


Opheliac

by Cysteine



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: F/F, F/M, Multi, Platonic BDSM, War Era
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-19
Updated: 2016-10-25
Packaged: 2018-08-23 09:59:38
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 21
Words: 47,552
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8323573
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Cysteine/pseuds/Cysteine
Summary: This is pretty dark, psychologically speaking. Hermione finds herself with her mind scrambled so that nobody can understand her and she's locked up as a mental patient under a strong disguise charm in St. Mungo's during The Dark Lord's reign.
How does she survive when muggle-borns are being hunted down and being given the Dementor's Kiss? How does Hermione cope with having a submissive streak that is unable to come out?
Idea inspired from Sucker Punch, title from Emilie Autumn song.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> "...I'm your Opheliac  
> I've been so disillusioned  
> I know you'd take me back  
> But still I feigned confusion  
> I couldn't be your friend  
> My world was too unstable  
> You might have seen the end
> 
> But you were never able  
> To keep me breathing  
> As the water rises up again  
> Before I slip away..."  
> Emilie Autumn, 'Opheliac'

I've become a ward of the Ministry. Locked up in long-term spell damage at St. Mungo's. They say that I don't remember my name, but I do. They say a lot of things that don't make sense.

I'm Hermione Jean Granger, but I cannot say it out loud to them. So I'm logged in as 'Jane Doe' here. I thought I was famous enough as Harry Potter's best friend that they would recognise me, but apparently not.

Apparently, it's easier to deal with inmates here if they keep their hair trimmed short. I hated it as the wand went over my head, dropping my bushy curls onto the ground. They even confiscated my wand, all as a part of protecting me from myself.

I've always taken great care of myself! Except for maybe that Troll in my first year. Or running off to find the Basilisk the next year. And abusing my time turner to help a convict and a creature marked for death escape dementors.  But I was good during my fourth year. Well, there was Viktor. But the things we did then that scared me don't scare me anymore. In fact, I've grown to miss it. But not like this.

I hate 'Healer Time'. I prefer being alone in my room, rather than strapped down to this bed while the Healers talk to each other like I'm not even in the room. 'She needs more Soulgament Potion', 'She needs less Soulgament Potion', 'She should undergo Pensieved Memory Regression'...

_I'm right here!_ I want to yell, but nothing ever comes out right. Something between my brain and my mouth got muddled, I can think fine but only speak gibberish.

"Nobody has come to identify her? It's a shame, she's such a pretty ginger. Maybe her family are muggles?" The male Healer Attendant, Scotty? I can't seem to hold onto their names. There's two Healers, and a team of five or so Healer Attendants. Scotty seems like the nicest one, even if he is a bit daft.

"I'm not a ginger, I'm a bushy brunette. My cat's a ginger." But it wouldn't do any good.

"Jane's doing it again." Healer O'Donnell said simply, not even trying to see if they can decode or unscramble what I'm saying.

Not the wand, please not the wand! But it was no good, and I knew I was being sedated again.

* * *

"Good Morning Jane." Healer O'Donnell said as I was revived. It's like I'm their fucking plaything.

I look down, and I'm tied to the chair. At least Viktor gave me a safeword when we used to play these games. He was also a decent kisser.

The Healer expected me to reply to her greeting, but I knew it wouldn't make any sense. Why bother replying to her with incoherent babbling? I'm sane and cognizant in my own head, and remembering that I'm sane within my brain is all I can hold onto.

I recall reading stories of children who were raised by animals and how they finally were integrated into society, but they always seemed developmentally challenged since they never learned to fully communicate with people. I wonder if the same thing can happen in reverse.

"Well, Jane, let's see what we can do today." She pulled a pensieve out from under her desk.

Memory regression. Great. The Healer had no idea how to find any particular memory since it was in my head, so she's resorted to rooting around in hopes to stumble upon the memory when I lost my ability to communicate and I was sent here as the war was about to truly begin.

Why haven't Harry and Ron come for me yet? They don't know I'm here, the insufferable know-it-all turned mute is practically roommates with the daft Lockhart, who keeps on marvelling at his ability to write in cursive, but doesn't know his name.

She pressed her wand to my temple, and I tried my hardest to push out the memory that I wanted to see. To remember what last happened when Hogwarts was attacked. It's a jumble, like I was hit with a modifying memory charm...

The wand plucked out a memory, and I immediately knew it was the wrong one. It wasn't just the wrong memory, but there were so many other details that were wrong. So much of it was altered in minute ways.

I was sitting in the Great Hall for breakfast, with my two best friends, Harry and Ron. I was reading a book as I munched on an apple, I think it was 'Hogwarts: A History'. The two boys were rolling their eyes at me as I read, and they wondered why I was so studious before eight in the morning.

But in the pensieve memory, I had straight red hair. We all were wearing Ravenclaw robes. Harry was Cho and Ronald was Luna. And they were quizzing me over the test we'd be taking later in History of Magic.

_ Why is this so wrong! _

"Well dear, that looks like a perfectly good morning, and you've had good friends in your House." The Healer said wistfully. I'm sure she's already gone to Professors McGonagall and Flitwick, asking to identify me using these clues from a previous session, and they were unable to ID me.

That's because this isn't me! I'm not a bloody Ginger! I hung my head in frustration, stomping my foot because it would be futile for me to tell her that this is all wrong.

"Let's try again; surely we will find the memory where you got affected. I really think we'll be able to reverse the damages once I know what we're dealing with." The Healer said good-naturedly.

"Yeah, let's try that again. Merlin knows how effective it's been so far." I said sarcastically, wondering how many weeks I've been here so far. I thought it was only 5 weeks, but I couldn't be sure. I've been knocked out so much that I may have lost days at a time.

I was in a dark corner of the library, keeping to myself. Viktor had sloughed off his gaggle of giggling girls, and pretended to read a book nearby me. I could tell he was working up the courage to do something, but I had no idea what. He wasn't about to attack me, but the sinful smile that he had as he held his wand up had me entranced.

"Miss Granger, I would be honored if you allowed me to take you to the Yule Ball." his accent was sharp, but his voice was rich. It wasn't until we locked eyes, and I felt his strength of personality that I realized that I had a crush on him. Something sparked within me, and as my mouth opened in a gasp, he knew I would say yes. I'd say yes to anything.

"What if I say no?" I replied coyly, realizing that I was flirting for the first time in my life. The words on the book below me were a jumble at this point, all of my focus was on him. Yet I didn't expect what he would do next.

He flicked his wand, and my wrists were pulled behind my back on the chair, tied together. My next sharp intake of air was followed by a tightening of my body. I was flushed, and soaking myself as his face and lips were centimeters away from me. My lip quivered, wanting to close the distance between us as a nervous thought of me being tied up in the library was chased away by the overwhelming arousal I felt under him.

"Then I may leave you like this until you do say yes." His knowing smirk told me that he knew that I was fully aroused at this, and he traced the back of his fingers up my thigh and to my skirt's hemline. I arched my back towards him, wondering why I was enjoying and wanting this.

"Do you tie up all of the girls you want?" I asked, only now realizing that my wand had been in my hand all along. He must have put it there when he tied me up.

"You're actually the first girl I've ever tried doing this with. I can't stand the girls who want me only because they think I'm famous and rich. You know you can untie yourself, right? You have your wand, and you could just ask me to untie you.

I didn't ask him to untie me. I was enjoying the moment too much, feeling his stubble graze my cheek as he whispered what he'd like to do with me after the Ball. I gulped, and worked at finding my voice.

"Yes, Viktor..." I shuddered as his wand ran over the curve of my breast, "I will go to the ball with you." He pulled back from having his lips at my ear to that painful closeness where I was about to beg for him to kiss me. I had never felt this overwhelmed by anyone before, but all he did was thank me and kiss my cheek.

It was the most erotic moment in my life, but the pensieve betrayed me yet again. The flawed reflection of my memory wasn't in the library. It wasn't Krum. And I was a Hufflepuff this time.

Karkaroff had me tied up, and it wasn't sexy. It was an interrogation. He wanted me to tell him what Cedric was planning to do for the first task. I had no idea, and he tried to obliviate the memory.

_ But this memory is a lie! _

"As I expected, you've been hit with a memory-modifying charm. Too bad the assailant died years ago, otherwise I could find out how he did that to you. But why didn't you turn up until now?"

"It wasn't him! He never touched me!" I shouted, wishing she could understand me.

"I know, Jane." She sighed, signaling her frustration. "He was a bad man, but he'll never hurt you again. Maybe Sprout will recognize you." Her voice betrayed her lack of confidence.

She summoned her assistant to take me back to my room. At least there I won't be treated like an victimized invalid. I won't be treated at all while I'm locked up and alone.

* * *

I knew that time had passed. Food was slipped under my door. Other patients got to be in a bed, got to walk around on the floor. I got this cell, and I couldn't remember why.

I think I was placed here on purpose. Was I seen as a threat? To myself, obviously. The scars on my arms weren't of my doing, though they looked very much like they were self-inflicted. They didn't feel right, though. They felt superficial.

I didn't feel right in my body. My breasts were smaller, I had short red hair, and I was admitted with too many cuts and bruises that I couldn't explain, even if I could talk coherently.

I thought that maybe I was being hidden and taken care of here as a way of protecting me from the war. But I figured out that the war couldn't have been going well since Albus died.

_Albus._ The name and his death just floated up in my head. Who is Albus? Why was his death so important? Was this a real memory surfacing? I wish I could read a Daily Prophet and find out who was controlling the Ministry. Fuck. I'd settle for a Quibbler.

It was when the Hospital was under an inspection that I realized what had happened. New people in charge for no reason. Every case file, which means people here, was reviewed. Someone is searching for something.

I'm searching for something myself. And the new Hospital Administrator looked familiar. She seemed like she should be locked up in here rather than me. Her dark hair seemed brittle and disheveled, but so was her stature.

_ She was there when Albus was killed. _

How did I know that? _Was I there? Did I kill this Albus?_

It felt like when I was alone in here, in the dark with my thoughts, that I could figure out what truly happened. Maybe if I could have my wand and a pensieve, I could extract and analyze the memory well enough to piece my mind back together.

All I knew though was that the Ministry was no longer safe, not if the scary people who killed Albus were taking charge.


	2. Chapter 2

The other Healer, Williams, was less polite. He simply thought that the right dose of potion would fix everything. I never met a more idiotic Healer in my life. I can't actually recall meeting many Healers, though.

"Alright, Jane, this should be a better dosage of Soulgament for you to sleep better and not cause as many disruptions."

"They aren't disruptions, I'm trying to talk to you!" He glared at me, almost angry with my tone.

"I know you're intelligent, and I know that you're not just faking this. But yelling at me in gibberish does us no good. So just be a good little girl and let us take care of you.

_ You are the dumbest Healer in all the land. _ My attitude had gotten sour and sarcastic, and it reminded me of someone I had looked up to before. But just like not being able to connect my mind to my voice right, my memory and my mind were suffering the same affliction.

I could remember The Order: McGonagall, Moody, Hagrid, Arthur, Molly, Lupin, Sirius, The Twins, the Thief, Kingsley, and...  _ And. _

"Who can't I remember!" I yelled, knowing there's a block in my mind.  _ Was The Order trying to protect Albus? _

I raged as I was strapped down to the table, and the Healer tried to dose me with potion. It smelled horrible, like it was made improperly. He would have taken points away for turning that swill in as a potion, and chastised you into the next week as to how poor you are at this.

_ He was the And. And him. He. Tall. Dark. And... _

The potion was funnelled into my mouth, and my nose was pinched shut. Bugger.

The sandy-colored Healer assistant,  _ Perseus, I think? _ Looked at me in pity as he helped me walk back to my room. He was probably the nicest one here, but there was something odd about him. He felt familiar. And he always seemed to feel guilty.

Maybe he was sweet on me, but knew he could never act on it? The potion was taking its effect on me, and I was going to pass out again within minutes. He unlocked my door, and I had a moment to do something rash. I missed being able to interact with people, and to truly discuss something. So I thanked him by kissing his cheek.

"Thank you." I said, not caring that he wouldn't understand.

"You're Welcome." His voice quivered as he said it, as if he wasn't used to saying that at all.

False sleep came to claim me yet again, and I didn't even register that he understood me.

* * *

 

The mind in its dream state must be when the subconscious is at its most powerful. It's trying to heal me as I sleep, but the spell is broken every morning when I wake up.

On top of the Astronomy Tower, Harry runs down in search for Madam Pomfrey. Albus wanted someone else though. Harry was always a stubborn prat.

I stood a level below them, Albus and the blonde boy. The creepy siblings. The furry child-eater. And the new Hospital Administrator. They all have names, and faces, but my mind can only hold one or the other. Albus is a blank figure, while the others are vividly real in my mind but have no names.

A dark, billowing robe went up past me. The robe held a wand. Albus said 'please' to it. A flash of green light, and Albus was dead.

The robe saw me, cursed, and looked at me. There was an emotion there, something raw and fragile. Not the eyes of a cold-blooded killer. Remorse. For what he did, and was about to do.

A yellow flash of light, followed by blue, then something was thrown at me. Instictively I caught it, when I should have ducked.

_ Fucking Portkey. _

And now I'm here. And the details get fuzzy.

And breakfast will be slid under my door, and the buggering process starts all over again.

* * *

Scotty was here, and smiling. Never a good thing.

"You've been behaving yourself, so I've been allowed to give you some time in our social area. Closely monitored, of course."

He handed me a glass of pumpkin juice and offered his arm to escort me, rather than the normal stupefy and levitation. Walking under my own will was exhilarating. Being allowed this breadcrumb of freedom shouldn't be so wonderful. I should be reminded of how little I have.

_ I can't talk, ask, or speak. But maybe I can write? _

I pointed at a nearby pen, hoping he would understand. He frowned, and decided something.

"Promise me, by nodding, that you're not going to hurt yourself with it." I nodded, wondering why he'd think I'd do that.

I looked around for paper, and he conjured me a sheet with his wand.

_ What to write? Can I do this? Make it short and concise. _

I took the pen, and quickly wrote: 'I am Hermione Jean Granger.'

**A Rajah Nominee Ginger Rem**

My face fell as I saw the words I wrote. I crumpled the paper in anger, and Scotty put his hands on mine in consolation.

"You're not stupid, nor are you crazy. You've just been... affected. Perhaps we can play a game?"

I sullenly nodded my head, glad to have this small bit of interaction to keep my wits about me. He pulled out a chessboard, and I smiled as I remembered when Ron taught me how to play.

"Ron taught me how to play chess." I said, just to pretend like this was a normal reality again.

He nodded, completely lost at what I said. He was going to simply appease me, but that in itself was a welcome distraction from the past few months. As he lead with his pawns and I opened with my knights, I realized that I had missed interaction.  _ If I behaved myself, maybe I could do this more often. _

"So, Jane, it seems like you can nod your head in response to yes-or-no questions just fine, so let's have a conversation. Let's see, are you single?"

The expression on my face must have said more than enough.

"I'll take that as a 'What the hell do you think? I'm locked away in St. Mungo's.' Am I right?"

He was pretty damn close to what I was thinking, so I nodded yes. Nobody knows or recognizes me, so I guess I am single. I wasn't still with Viktor, and Ronald never got the nerve to ask me out, though I thought that there was someone else I was attracted to. I shook my head, wishing I could get to the bottom of that mystery.

"Yes, you're single, but no." I waved him that I didn't meant that second part, but just shrugged my shoulders.

"I'm not asking for myself; there are rules against a Healer in training to get involved with their patients. It's just that Perseus caught a lot of flack for you kissing his cheek. Since you cannot consent to anything here, they worried that he was taking advantage of you."

_ Bollocks! I kissed him! _

"But don't worry, he won't hurt you. I mean, he's just a volunteer here, but he seems like a nice enough guy. You did mean to kiss his cheek, didn't you?"

I nodded my head, but not sure if he could understand my reasoning.

"Did you kiss him because you fancy him, or because you were just being nice? Wait, that wasn't a yes or no..." He rambled off.

I shrugged and held up two fingers in the air. I can do this,  _ I can communicate! _

"So, you don't fancy him? Sorry, he's offered to take a weekend shift for me if I could help him understand what happened. Now that we know we can communicate with you, that will make things much easier. It's a shame you can't even write, because if we could prove that you're mute we can arrange to get you out of here faster."

I smiled in appreciation, and then I saw the Hospital Administrator enter the social area, and approach us.  _ She was with the murderer!  _ Now was the time that I wish I could communicate. I wanted to get out of here, I needed to hide. She was bad.

"Intern, this is the Jane Doe patient who cannot speak, correct?"

"Yes, mum."

"Is she a mudblood?"

"No idea. But she's no threat to anyone as far as I can tell."

"Can she even do magic?" She asked, looking down her nose at me.

"She did some of the worst things to herself the first night we had her in a regular bed wandlessly. It's why she was put into a private cell."

_ Spontaneous random magic, like back when I was young and before I got my wand? _ My pulse raced in fear, and I knew what I could do to get out of here.

I went with their expectations, and yelled at the top of my lungs, letting my control over my magic collapse as the chessboard exploded in front of me, and the table instantly ignited.

_ I was always good with blue fire. _

Orderlies were there in a second, and I was bound by ropes and taken back to my cell. The Administrator decided that I wouldn't have to be taken into questioning before the Commission, whatever that was.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Trigger Warning: Abuse of Power.

"Hello Jane, I'm here with a change of clothes for you." Scotty, the Healer Attendant said to me. It was such a relief that they knew I wasn't insane and could understand them, and that I could respond non-verbally.

_ Maybe that's why toddlers are so grumpy; they understand what they want but cannot convey it. _ There is such a frustration there that cannot be resolved until they can express themselves.

Healer Williams stopped outside of my cell. "Scotty, how is Jane Doe today?"

_ Please let him know I can communicate, I'm responsive, I just can't talk or write! _

"No progress so far. Trying to get her to change her clothes, but she doesn't seem to understand."

"Alright, just be careful. She blew up a table and set it on fire right in front of our new boss. You're authorized to use magic on her if she gets to be too disruptive." The Healer said, muttering about different potions to neutralize me.

"BUT I CAN UNDERSTAND YOU!" I yelled, and Scotty only grinned at that. He now had a reason to silence me. Oh god no.

"Jane, I have a change of clothes for you. Will we do this the easy way or  **the hard way?** I'm the only person who knows you can respond to someone, so it's like you're on a desert island and I'm the only other person there.  _ Now get naked for me. _ "

A chill ran through me. He just needed me to change my clothes, he had clean ones there. It made sense. But he wasn't about to turn his back to me. He was going to watch, on purpose.

"You fucking pervert." I spat, not caring that he wouldn't understand, or at least not care. He raised his wand at me, but I didn't want to give him the satisfaction. I began undoing my hospital gown.

"Oh, good girl, you're learning how to play the game. Make me happy, and you'll not suffer. Muggles call it 'Stockholm Syndrome'. I just think it's how you will rationalize the only options you will have around me. Now, take off your robe. I want to see you starkers."

I dropped the last scrap of fabric, the humiliation he put me in wasn't the exciting kind. With Viktor, he cheered me up after Ronald sent me away, crying. I wonder how that memory would get distorted in the pensieve.

"Hands behind your back, you little cunt. Don't cover yourself up, I want to look at you. Huh. Barely any tits."

_ This isn't my body, this isn't my hair, and I swear, if I ever get my voice back I will repay you for this. _

"You seem angry at me for now. Don't worry, it will pass. I'll break you and you'll be mine in time." He threw the new hospital gown at me, vanishing the old one. "I'll have you begging for my attention and offering me all of your holes like a filthy whore before I'm done with you."

I fumed, but knew all I could do was bide my time and hope to get out of here, or get him fired. I didn't realize that my last stunt was going to have me locked away without any contact for the next week.

* * *

Healers O'Donnell and Williams both seemed to avoid me for the first two days. I knew it was two days because I took the plastic forks with each meal slipped under my door and broke a prong off of it for each meal.  _ Three meals a day, one prong each, two days with six prongs. _

Sirius said I was the brightest witch of my age, and look at me now.  _ Counting. Waiting. _ Nothing to do, or read, or talk to. I can't even write anything down for myself to look at.

_ I'm a prisoner inside my own head. _

Let's review the facts. I'm Hermione Jean Granger. I'm a muggle-born. The Ministry has more than likely fallen to Voldemort's forces. I'm a prisoner in long-term confinement for spell damage. They don't know who I am, and my body and hair aren't right. I've effectively been taken out of the war effort. Either side could have done this to me, for their own reasoning. I'm beginning to believe it wasn't the Death Eaters, since they'd just rape, torture, or kill me. Or put me under the Imperious Curse. But why would The Order do this to me? Would Minerva and Molly go this far to protect me? Are Ron and Harry locked away like this too, because we're simply 'too young'?

Another tray came under the door. Soup and a sandwich. No fork. No tines to count.

_ But if I don't have a tine, how will I remember the time? Does it really matter anymore? _

I don't even have access to daylight to help me, and my circadian rhythm could be completely shot. I wish Healer O'Donnell were here with the Pensieve, it at least alleviates the boredom. Even a visit from Perseus. I haven't seen him since I kissed his cheek.

_ Yeah, because you're a seventeen year old virgin and a mental ward patient. That will make him want you. _

But he was sweet, I think. I want him to talk to me, let me know why he feels so sad.

Hours pass. I lie down, but cannot sleep. I can't even seem to go through my memories and daydream. Another meal, and the water tastes off.  _ Is it the third day since I've seen anyone? _

My eyelids get heavy, and I know I was drugged.

The Yule Ball wasn't over, but it was for Harry and Ron. He is such an idiot! I stormed away from them, wondering why boys my age were so immature. Honestly, Viktor is the enemy? And Harry just stood there, not defending me for wanting to date and be treated nicely. He was the first person to ever look at me like that, and it was nice. What he did to me was amazing as well.

He saw my tears, and frowned. "Weasley was rude to you, no?" He asked, his sharp accent seemingly softer. I nodded, and he wiped my tears away with his handkerchief. I smiled my thanks, and he offered me a glass of punch.

"Why are boys so daft?" I asked, and he only shrugged his response. "He has many siblings, and is treated like the baby of the family. He has much to grow up from. I have 4 brothers, and was oldest. I helped take care of them and grew up faster. Come, let us go outside and I will cheer you up."

I smiled at that, but saw Snape and Karkaroff arguing. "They will stop us from... well, whatever it is people would do out here." Viktor smiled back. "I won't lay a finger on you, My Hermione." The way he said that, My Hermione, sent a thrill down my spine and tightened in my quim. I didn't understand why, but it turned me on. I wanted to belong to him, to do whatever he asked, and to be told that I was a good girl.

As if he knew what I wanted, he lead us off to the greenhouses. He pulled out his wand, saw nobody there, and darkened the area for more privacy. "Hermione, you know how beautiful you look tonight. I wanted to ask you something." I nodded.

"Do you trust me?" I nodded again. "Will you obey me?" My breath hitched, and my thighs clenched together as I nodded for a third time.

"I want a memento of this evening, of dancing with you, and when I kiss you goodnight." He had better kiss me goodnight! "Give me your knickers."

I gulped, as if cold water were thrown on me. "But I need them when I go back to my room." Actually, my dress was floor-length. Nobody would know but the two of us. And the idea of that, of me going back through the Ball and up to Gryffindor Tower put a surge through me. "I thought you'd just tie me up and snog me good and proper." Where's my sodding courage now?

I stood slowly, visibly shaking. Viktor put his arms around me, and my eyes looked into his hungrily. My heart was beating wildly, and I found my fingers inside my dress and lowering my undergarments for him. His smile was less than inches away from my lips, and I was about to be in a frenzy if something didn't happen.

He held my panties in his hands, and could tell that I was exceedingly wet. He pocketed them, and sat in front of me. "You've been a really good girl, and I have a reward for you now." Bugger, please just tell me!

"I know there are protection wards here so that we would get caught if we tried to fool around." In the distance, I could hear Professor Snape chastise a couple for snogging. "We can bypass them ourselves. I want to see you touch yourself and orgasm for me." He wants to watch me frig myself? I'm so wound up right now, I don't care!

"Yes, Sir." I panted, working my skirt up and licking my fingers. I was ready to doff my entire dress and let him take me right here, but this seemed all the more erotic. Naughty, even. My two fingers slid inside without any resistance; I sorely needed this release. I pumped in and out, breath shuddering as our eyes stayed locked on each other.

He pulled my hand way, and my hips shuddered, giving way to a full body spasm. I was betrayed by my own libido. As I began to beg to continue, he put my fingers into his mouth, and he savored my flavor. The look on his face told me all I needed to know. He desired all of me, he found me savory, and as he let go of my hand, he ordered me to use three fingers.

Three of my fingers were pumping inside me now. I felt a bit more full than before, but it was amazing. "Hermione, I'm slightly larger than your three fingers. I look forward to proving that to you someday. And thank you for obeying me and calling me Sir, I very much appreciate it." My hand was pumping into me wildly, and my other hand clenched my breast as I felt waves of pleasure start to peak within me.

"Sir, please just fuck me! Fuck me, fuck me, fuck..." My waves began to crest, and I was undone. I forgot to cast a silencing charm and I was going to come loudly. His lips took mine, and as I screamed out my orgasm, his mouth was there, taking it in. As I pulsed into small shudders of pleasure, and my thighs were quivering as if possessed, I slipped my fingers out of myself and and gave myself over to the kiss.

As we straightened ourselves and returned to the party, I found my footing again as he bade me a goodnight and placed a chaste kiss upon my lips. He never laid a finger upon me.

I woke up from the dream, frustrated and bothered. Do they monitor us? Do I really care anymore if they see me do this? I ran my fingers over my quim, noting my heat and need.

Feeling ashamed and dirty, I delved into my folds and sought release.

* * *

I woke up, with a tray of food waiting for me. No fork again. I think it's been four.. no, five?... days since the explosion incident.

There are four padded walls around me. I can count the buttons on the wall, or the number of lights I can see from my door, but the numbers start to lose meaning. The pile of tines I had lost meaning. So much of what I am was slipping away.  _ I'm drowning in absolute nothingness. _

Another sleepless day. Or night. I think they were drugging me to sleep every other meal, so that I had no idea how many days have passed. Three meals a day, sleeping every other meal, so if I slept 3 times, it was only three days, right?  _ Maybe it was more. Maybe less? _

My name is Hermione Jean Granger. I'm not a redhead. And this isn't my body. Maybe it is, and I was hit with a disguise charm? I have a better figure than this, I have a healthy weight and not a sickly look. I'm not a cocaine-addled muggle model.

_ But I don't know what I'm here for. Or when I'll get out. Or my purpose. _

I think I had a dream about wielding a wand, doing magic.  _ But that's just nonsense, right? Did I just wake up from a long dream of fantasy? _

Another plate slid under the door. Existing for another day. Locked away alone.

Maybe magic does exist, food keeps coming through the gap in the door.

It has to come from somewhere. I got a fork again, but couldn't recall why it was so important to me. I put the fork back on the empty tray when I was done eating, and flushed the rest of the tines I had away.

_ There was something else, outside this room. It was important. Maybe. _

* * *

I had a new game. I didn't eat the food that the gap at the bottom of the door gave me.

_ Fuck the door, it's an asshole. _

But I was thirsty. And I couldn't trust the water. Avoiding it was harder, because I got dizzy after some time. I wasn't able to stand, but there wasn't much where to walk to. So I crawled on my knees.

New tray of food. Soup. That has water in it. Water has to be safe. I was betrayed by my growling stomach, the headache, and crawling slowly was difficult now with the dizziness.

"FUCK YOU DOOR!" I yelled as I threw the soup against the door, then realized that I could have eaten it.

I slammed my fist into the door, and it hurt.  _ Pain clears head. pain good. _

I had a headache. So I slammed my head into the door. Still hurt. Again. Head clear now.

_ I'm dehydrated. I need fluids. Drink the water. _

Bad water. Bad... stuff in it.

I'm losing myself, and need myself to stay together.

_ My name is Hermione Jane Granger, but everyone calls me Jane. _

My mouth hurts, so dry. Tired. Must drink water before I pass out.

I take the cup and gulp it down, surrendering. I collapsed into oblivion.

* * *

I opened my eyes to bright lights. I'm on a bed. Strapped down. Sandy blond hair was looking down at me. Sad eyes, but glad to see I'm still here.

"Healer Williams! Jane's awake!"

"Yeah, you don't have to shout." I said.  _ Fucking futile, but please not so loud. _

He glanced down, curious. "Sorry. I... was a bit loud, wasn't I? You were passed out for two days. I..." He grimaced. "Had to clean you due to being knocked out. But you're okay now, the Healers will take care of you." His talking was wrong; he was faking nervousness.

_ His eyes were dark and old, they didn't match his face. He was a lie, like me. _

Healer Williams came to me, nudging the volunteer assistant aside. "Thank you, Perseus. Think about it, one more week of community service, and you'll be done here. Stay out of trouble, okay?"

The boy nodded shamefully. "No more pranks." He promised.

"Jane, you gave us quite the scare. You malnourished and dehydrated yourself pretty severely. We're giving you restorative potions and putting you on a high-calorie diet, you're way too skinny." He seemed genuinely scared. Maybe he wasn't so bad.

"Scotty, she's going to need a change, get cleaned, and strapped back down after dinner tonight. She's not to be given any solid foods for the time being, so she won't be able to hurt herself with the utensils." The Healer Attendant smiled vindictively.

_ Something is bad with him. He's a bad man. _

Why was he bad? Come back, memory!  _ He... is scary. Don't anger him. _

Scotty put a milkshake in front of me, putting the rim to my lips.

"You're going to behave yourself tonight, aren't you, Jane?" He said cruelly.

I froze, my eyes looking into his. I nodded, horror filling me. He knows I can understand him, and that I can respond. But he's hiding that fact from everyone else for his own sick games.

"Open your mouth and start swallowing." He said sweetly, and it was the cruelest thing ever, "You're going to learn to enjoy this. A lot."

* * *

I have a small world.

Only 5 people have seen me here. One is a killer. One doesn't care if she helps me. One sees me as a puzzle for potion-dosing. One rarely speaks to me. And the other gives me more attention than the rest. He is cruel, but doesn't hurt me. Not really. He is the only one who knows I can respond since the Healers barely notice me and think I'm non-responsive.

I should try and get their attention.  _ Would sign language work? _

It's the one book I never got around to reading. Drinking my lunch today was pretty much an exercise in knowing how sadistic he would be with me. He let it get into my nose as I gagged and it poured down my chin.  _ Apparently this was his sick idea of foreplay, since I was supposed to become 'his little cumslut'. _

I think Healer O'Donnell will try Memory Regression tomorrow with me. I just have to get through tonight's dinner with the asshole.

"Hey Jane." He said with a fake sincerity, the smile all for show. "You ready for dinner? Like a fucking baby, aren't you. We can't give you as much as a biscuit or maybe you'll try to choke yourself to death on it."

I glared at him as he waved his wand and the bed I was strapped down to turned into something that resembled me somewhat sitting up.

"Hey, since I know you can understand me and all, how about I make you a little deal? If you show me how well you can suck tonight, I'll authorize you to have the privilege of using a straw from now on." He brought the liquefied dinner to my face too quickly and the steaming broth scalded its way down my chin and chest.

_ Fuck, it burns!  _ But I didn't dare open my mouth. The bastard was taunting me, and I wouldn't stoop to his level.

"Open your mouth bitch and take it like the little slut you are. You know, if you pull that little stunt like you did before with wild magic, the Healers may decide to lobotomize you so you can't access your magic. You'd be a walking vegetable then, and much less fun as my personal cum-dumpster. I'd much rather have you submit to me."

I kept my jaw clenched shut, furious that the Ministry even did something as barbaric as lobotomies.  _ He's not going to make me submit! He's never going to be any kind of Dominant with me! _

"Jane, behave yourself or I'll make it look like you're out of control with your magic. What would you prefer? Doing as I say, or losing what little control you have left of yourself? You think you're a prisoner now, unable to communicate to others? Wait until you lose the ability to even think like you are now. I've seen Dementor victims, you'd be just a shade more aware than them."

My anger gave way to fear, and I opened my mouth for the scalding broth to burn its way down my esophagus.

* * *

After I was done with the soup, Scotty released my restraints and put me in a full body-bind hex. "Time to get you changed, Jane."

I was moved into a shower area. Water! I missed warm showers, to feel cleansed by cascading water rather than just a cleaning charm that always feels a bit abrasive. He saw me eye it, but then I lowered my head and resigned myself to what he would do next.

_ Just get it over with, Scotty _ . I'm not going to let him win, but I'm not going to give him reason to have me lose what's left of my mind. I'm going to survive this, with as much dignity as I can retain.

"Look, I'm sorry. Jane, you don't know what's been going on lately. My... family was under investigation for blood purity. You-Know-Who hasn't been seen, but it feels like his side has won. Our new Hospital Administrator keeps better tabs on the blood status of our intakes over the actual rate of treatment and healing. She's really not happy with you being listed as 'unknown', but it's better that than muggleborn.

"You know, you're really easy to talk to. And I've just been under so much stress, and felt the need to be seen acting how they would want me to. You have no idea how lucky you are that you can't communicate and that you are truly safer here like this than anywhere else. I mean, even accidentally saying the V-name undoes all protective spells and lands you on a one-way ticket to Azkaban. And the Dementors aren't working there anymore. They're in the Ministry itself as a part of the interrogations of those that turn themselves in or are brought in under force."

Scotty looked relieved to be able to say all that.  _ He did have family and concerns; perhaps he wasn't as cruel as I had originally thought. _ My small smile to him must have been heartening.

"I'm going to let you have a shower before you get your clean set of robes. I'll also get you authorized to use a straw and see to it that you're quickly removed from the 'danger of self-harm' list. You're not going to hurt yourself, are you?" He asked.

I shook my head emphatically.  _ I'm going to get control over my meals with a straw, and get a shower tonight! _

He released the full body bind and instead had my ankles shackled together. "Just in case you try to make a run for it. I'm sorry, but we're going to have to slowly build our trust." He turned on the water, and spelled it to be just a bit hotter than body temperature. "Jane, hold out your hand. Is it warm enough for you?"

I nodded my head gratefully, and he provided me some soap, shampoo, and conditioner. Another flick of his wand and I was disrobed, naked in front of him. He held a towel for me, waiting for me to shower and be done. There was something in his blue eyes I hadn't seen before, like he understood what it was like to be a prisoner of unforeseen circumstances.

I took the opportunity before me and reveled in the shower. He could rake his eyes all over me for all I cared at that point, I had warm water beating relaxation into my back. I had my hair, what was left of it, soaked and feeling wondrous. The mint soap tingled as I lathered myself down, oblivious to the world surrounding me and just soaking up the sensation of warmth and cleanliness.

Lathering my hair, I breathed a sigh of contentedness as I realized that I was a bit excited at being exposed like this. It reminded me of being with Viktor, and I took a moment as my conditioner was soaking in to pinch my nipples roughly as I had always dreamed of him doing to me. It was sharp yet good, and I had to stop and rinse off as my body begged for more. I stepped away from the water to signal that I was done, and he turned off the water and brought me the towel.

I thought it was the products I used on myself, but then realized that it was his scent that was hitting my senses. It was rich and inviting, and as he slowly put the towel around me, I leaned into his embrace. My cheek rested next to his, the distance between our lips becoming ever increasingly difficult to ignore.

_ Why am I feeling this way about him now? _ I thought he was cruel and malevolent, but instead I'm finding his kinder, gentler side and it feels refreshing.

"I... don't want to get into trouble, Jane." He whispered, his body pressing against mine in that almost painfully aroused way. His lips grazed the back of my neck as his firmness was pressed against the curve of my bum. It's like my body is betraying me.

He backed away from me, and dried me with a charm. He handed me my new robes, and let me dress on my own. I was clean, warm, and horribly frustrated. I was craving a sharp hair tug on hair I no longer have, to be dropped to my knees by the sexy, silky voice. To hear myself beg, vocally, as I get filled and pounded mercilessly. I looked over Scotty's dark hair and blue eyes, and found myself lusting for something, anything.

He could tell what was going through me. "Let me get you back to your bed. You'll be strapped down for tonight, but we can see about changing that soon."

As I was escorted back to my bed and strapped down, he leaned over me and bade me goodnight. As I found myself falling asleep, the silky tones of Severus Snape was in my head, making my body ache with need. I really need to get shagged soon.


	4. Chapter 4

My mind was awash in chaos and confusing memories, things that I wasn't sure was right.

It didn't seem like it should have been in my mind this way, yet it felt oddly familiar. Perhaps I am indeed going mad; the pensieve has made a mockery of my most treasured memories that now I'm starting to believe in complete fiction as being another possibility of truth.

I was in what appeared to be detention with Professor Snape. But I wasn't mucking out cauldrons or writing lines. I was kneeling, hands clasped behind my back, and head lowered deferentially to him. I knew I wasn't in trouble, but rather the unyielding warmth and pressure within me was building as I knelt there. I needed his touch, his contact, but I knew it wouldn't come. He was being proper, while fulfilling what I so desperately needed.

"You know that these sessions won't be allowed to continue. My role as Spy for The Order will, undoubtedly, take me away from the comforts of mentoring you and guaranteeing my supposed loyalty to The Dark Lord." He looked down upon her, his mouth pressed into a tight frown. "I cannot risk divulging any more to you, yet I fear that I have said too much."

"I understand, Sir." I replied, knowing not to delve. But I was curious about so much; how much did he enjoy being my mentor? How could he appear to betray The Order and gain so much standing among the Death Eaters? The only reason Voldemort hadn't risked open war yet was because of Dumbledore... "May I ask you a question, Sir?" He nodded.

"Headmaster Dumbledore's injured hand has seemed to worsen. It appears that whatever affected it has spread to his entire arm. Are there curses that are terminal? If it were a matter of poison, I'm sure you would have cured him by now." Severus paused, and nodded his agreement.

"Indeed, there are a few Dark Spells that, if not reversed or even contained in time, guarantee the death of its target. Such deaths would be drawn out and quite painful." It dawned upon me that Dumbledore would prefer a clean death, one that served a purpose. I had been kneeling for almost twenty minutes when the pieces fell into place, and I felt like the ground was taken out from under my feet.

"Sir, you're to kill Albus Dumbledore, aren't you?" I asked, wishing I didn't have to ask those words. Wishing I could forget what I realized. Wanting to undo it all, to rewind to a time when Professor Snape and I first began my training. He turned away from me rather than respond. It was a few minutes before he did anything, but I didn't expect his response. He kissed the top of my head, and asked me to forgive him.

I startled awake, forgetting that I was strapped down to the bed. Dark eyes peered down at me, its look unfathomable. If they know I can communicate, or even respond, I'm going to be forced to testify as to the status of my blood.

"You okay, Jane? We've got an appointment with Healer O'Donnell today, so let's' get your breakfast taken care of and get you ready for that." He sat me up, and held a glass of pumpkin juice and a straw for me.

"Thank you." I mumbled politely as I drank my breakfast. I could tell that there were nutritional additives, but thankfully it didn't affect the flavor much.

"You're welcome, Jane." I stopped drinking for a second, wondering if Perseus understood me, or just assumed that I was thanking him. I looked around, and saw we were alone for now. Could I trust him?

"Jane, I really wish I could know what was going on in your mind. At least what you were thinking when you pecked my cheek." He asked, taking a napkin and wiping my mouth clean.

"You were being nice." I said, looking into his eyes and looking for understanding.

His eyes met mine, and I could tell that he did. He blinked once, slowly.

"You can understand me, can't you?"  _ He can understand me! Please respond! I'm not crazy! _

He turned away abruptly, as if ignoring my outburst. "Don't get yourself into any more trouble with the outbursts, please."

"Perseus, please... Please." He must have understood me.  _ I'm not alone here _ . He knew what I was saying.

"Jane, the Healer will be with you soon."

* * *

"Good afternoon, Jane. We're going to continue our memory regression therapy, and I'm happy to say that I've been charting your memories and I think we'll soon come across the triggering memory that will help us find out what happened to your ability to communicate."

She didn't even wait for a response from me, but it was nice that she talked to me and let me keep my dignity as a witch. Before she put the wand-tip to my head to extract the memory, she noticed something on me.  _ Had whatever disguise charm failed momentarily? _

"Curious. Has Jane been exhibiting any unusual behavior?" I thought about it, and shook my head. Healer O'Donnell wasn't looking my way when I did.

Perseus answered. "Not that I could tell, mum. Well, she's actually... less violent. But I thought she finally acclimated to this place. Why do you ask?"

The Healer did a series of complicated diagnostic spells, but finally resorted to getting a sample of my blood. "Get me a copper pot, and bring me a sample of vial #13 from my desk."

Perseus looked worried at that. "What's in the vial?" I asked, forgetting that they wouldn't understand me.

"What poison are you testing for in her blood? I thought you could tell well enough by diagnostic spells."  _ They think I was poisoned?! _

The Healer pointed out some very pale blue freckles, which apparently is indicative of early signs of potion toxicity. "She's been getting this slipped into her for a while now. Not sure what potion it is, but it needs to stop."

"Could be Healer Williams' accidental doing. I'll go get her dosing record." Perseus ran off, panicked.

"Don't worry, Jane, you're not in any immediate danger. Even if you were, I keep a spare bezoar on me at all times." I visibly relaxed at the news, and she noticed.

"You... can understand me. Merlin! Why hasn't anyone told me you're capable of understanding speech?"

"Because none of you have been able to understand mine." I replied hotly.

Perseus returned with my records, and witnessed the exchange. "I can only guess that since nobody could understand her, we all assumed she couldn't understand us. It's definitely not a mental break, but some sort of spell damage that is blocking her from communicating."

She put the blood into the cauldron, followed by her vial. She stirred it with a wooden rod a few times, and saw the pale pink steam emerge from it. "Bring me vial #21." The Healer noted on my file that I was to undergo a detoxification program immediately, and that I'd be under no potions for the next week.

"What's wrong?" I asked, scared.

Perseus returned with the second vial, and Healer O'Donnell took no time in adding it to the cauldron when dark smoke rose from the cauldron. "Confirmed. She's been slipped lust potions since she got here; it's weakened her self-control which explains her outbursts. And possibly her kissing your cheek, Mister Evans."

Perseus breathed a sigh of relief, glad to have an explanation.

I pointed back towards the pensieve, and Healer O'Donnell understood my request. "You wish to continue trying to find the trigger, aren't you?" I nodded. "You can respond. You're muggleborn, aren't you? I won't turn you in, not like this. Not to these people. Bellatrix Lestrange in charge of St. Mungo's, when we all know she's responsible for the Longbottoms?"

I was relieved. The Healer was on my side, and we now know that I've been getting a lust potion in all of my food and other potions. But I'm going to get treatment and get my body filtered out.

"There shouldn't be any danger for memory regression while having some lust potion in you. Let's keep digging."

The explosion a few floors below me could be felt under my feet, and I frantically shared the vial of Felix Felicis with Ron, Luna, and Ginny. "Harry is with Dumbledore, and he wants us to patrol and protect the school. I have the map, so we can watch where Draco is."

As we all examined the map and couldn't find Draco, we knew he was in the Room of Requirement. My eyes were fixed on the dungeons, where The Dark Robes were at. It was pacing in the Slytherin Head of House office, labeled as Severus Snape.

He told me he was sorry, and asked me to forgive him. And he wiped my memory of the situation, only to return when the situation was most dire. "You all go up there and keep him from leaving that room. I've got somewhere else to go."

Ron looked at me with concern; his eyes were resigned in understanding. "He can take care of himself. But I understand. Take care of yourself, 'Mione." I nodded, and ran down the staircase towards the dungeons.

I flew into his office, but stopped short of running into his arms. I wanted to, so much, but he had forbade it. "Sir, we believe that whatever Draco is up to, it's happening tonight." I replied, hearing deep bells clanging overhead. It was like churchbells ringing darkly.

"Death Eaters have breached the wards of Hogwarts." He whispered, almost fearfully. The bells were drowned out by a series of three deep clangs in slow succession. The sound was ominous, and Snape used his wand to seal the Slytherin Dungeons with an echoing squelch. "That one means Fenrir. Coded that one with his blood myself over a decade ago. Hermione, you're not safe. And your mind is about to get really crowded. You need to go into hiding with Potter. You need to find and destroy The Dark Lord's Horcruxes."

I was panicked; I was going to have to leave all this behind? And leave him? "Sir, I can't! There has to be a better way..." He's got to go kill Albus Dumbledore to assure his loyalty. My eyes widened at the memories unfolding within me, gulping as I feel like I'm drowning in myself.

"Go! We each have our missions to fulfill for this war." Severus, the one who was mentoring me, my Severus, was to leave me. I wanted to follow him, but knew I needed to find Harry and do my job. Looking out the window, I saw green light from The Dark Mark floating over the castle. Someone has died. I told my wand to point me, and I followed it up to the Astronomy Tower.

Draco Malfoy, the blond ferret, had his wand trained on Albus Dumbledore. Fenrir, Bellatrix, and the Carrows were there for the assassination. But nothing happened until Severus Snape, the one whom I pledged myself to, pulled out his wand and killed the Headmaster. I stood frozen, a floor beneath them, watching through the slats between the floors.

Severus saw me, re-enabled the modified memory charm, disguised me, and threw a portkey directly at me. He gave me my escape, my life, and my ability to live free. He needed me to not betray his secret, and in modifying my memory again, he scrambled my ability to communicate it in any form. But the spell misfired; I wasn't able to speak or write out about Snape's role and his murder of Dumbledore as a ploy by Albus, but instead was effectively made mute over everything. His dark eyes conveyed his guilt and sorrow.

Coming out of the pensieve, the memory the Healer saw was correct. The pensieve didn't lie. I was Hermione Jane Granger in the memory. I am Hermione Jane Granger. I looked up to see if Healer O'Donnell finally understood my real identity, but my eyes were locked into those same dark eyes of guilt and sorrow. Healer O'Donnell was stunned and slumped over in her seat.

"Jane, you're not safe here anymore. Someone was drugging you with a nearly untraceable potion to make you go wild enough to be lobotomized and get you out of the picture." Perseus Evans stated, his posture more like an Auror during a mission rather than a wayward kid doing community service.

"You know who I am. You've always been able to understand me. Why have I been here!" I demanded, shouting.

"Because you have been safer here than on the run, and I was able to keep an eye on you here, Miss Granger. Time for one more prank for Perseus Evans." He raised his wand, shooting out sparks and triggering the fire-suppression systems for the entire hospital.

He put his arms around me, and apparated us away.


	5. Chapter 5

I landed in a comfortable chair, and the sandy-haired boy started doing complicated protection charms, as well as sealing me within the confines of this house.

"Let me guess, you helped me escape a prison only to be in a nicer one."

He turned to me, his face full of frustration. "No, you silly girl, I took you out of a compromised pseudo safe house into one that is indeed safe!"

"I knew you always understood me." I said coldly, my head starting to throb. "I can only assume you were the one who scrambled my ability to communicate to everyone else. Why did you do that?"

He handed me a glass of black liquid. "I'd like to give you a pain relieving potion for the headache you're about to endure to go with your hidden memories unfolding, but the Healer was right. You need to be detoxified of the lust potion. Here, drink it."

I glared at him. "Why should I trust you? Why drink this?"

"It will help detoxify you in hours rather than days. It's muggle chemistry, if you must know. Activated Charcoal." He cupped my cheek with his hand, tracing a finger over the edge of my earlobe with maddening slowness. His hand went through my hair and he grabbed a fistful and gave a small tug. My body traitorously reacted to it, and my thighs were quivering in an instant need.

"Miss Granger, the potion wasn't keyed to anyone in particular, which makes your would-be poisoner/rapist all the more difficult to identify. Now, drink what I gave you or within the next few moments you'll be begging for my cock." His smirk looked forced. "Unless that's what you want."

I downed it quickly; it was disgusting. But I could trust muggle chemistry, and knew what Activated Charcoal was. And what it was used for. He backed away from me, and my body was craving him to do the opposite.

"Where are Harry and Ron?" I asked. He handed me a copy of The Quibbler.

**_Harry Potter Invades Ministry, Frees Muggle-Borns_ **

"Still an idiot." I chastised, realizing that they needed me. "What are you going to do with me? Keep me a prisoner?"

My head exploded as the details of Dumbledore's murder came clear. My head was in my hands as vertigo struck, and my stomach churned as everything started to fall into place.

"No; you're supposed to be with Harry and Ron, destroying the Horcruxes. I'm going to keep a tracker and a communication knut on you in case... well, when you need saving." He put a knut with a permanent sticking charm behind my right ear. "I'll be wearing one as well, and make it transparent so as not to attract attention. It will receive all the time, and transmit only when you touch it."

"WHO ARE YOU?!" I screamed, knowing that our bodies, faces, and hair were all lies.

"It is I." He responded, taking the glamour charms off of both of us. "I am sorry I made you look so much like a malnourished ginger. You are truly, too recognizable, Hermione." I looked back at the same eyes I've seen before, the ones I've always seen. Now framed with sleek, black hair to his shoulders. It was Severus Snape.

_ Perseus Evans. Severus Snape. _

"No wonder I trusted you, Perseus!" I howled, throwing my empty cup at him.

"I couldn't go in there as 'Save Pureness', now could I?!" Severus shouted back. "I was under orders to protect you students, the school, and Draco from killing Albus. I was told, by Albus himself, that I'd have to kill him and keep my true loyalty a secret."

Severus sat on a chair across the room from me. "You weren't supposed to be there; I had few choices at my disposal. So I hid you someplace where I could keep tabs on you. At least until my betrayal of The Order looked complete!"

I thought of the Hospital, what little I got to see of it. "Where's my wand?" I asked, needing to feel some sense of power within myself.

"Hermione..." He started, about to tell me something I wouldn't like.

"Don't call me that. My name is Jane." I glared at him, challengingly.

He sighed. "Jane, you dropped your wand in the tower when you took possession of the portkey. It was too easily traceable to you, so I destroyed it. You know how detailed Ollivander’s notes were. He could identify the witch or wizard from a glance of the wand."

"I'll need a new wand, won't I?" I snapped, glad that I could be angry at him. He produced a wand from the mantle of his fireplace.

"Nine inches, Holly. Unicorn hair. Owned by a woman who wanted nothing more than to see The Dark Lord taken down." I looked at him, confused.

"Won't she need it?" I asked.

"Not since she got the kiss for mating with a muggle. It was my mother's." It struck me that his boss, Voldemort, had ordered it.

"I'm sorry."

"I've got few clues as to where your boys are. If I can manage to find them, I will happily send you back there to help them. But know this; the Ministry has fallen, and you are Undesirable #2. The only person above you on the most wanted list is Harry. You should get some rest; the memory charm's breaking is going to make the next few hours... well, disturbing. I can't give you anything for it, and I suggest you leave this wand inaccessible for the time being."

"Want to strap me down to a table again? Throw me into a padded cell where I count the broken tines to my forks as a calendar?!" I screamed, my voice cracking. "I was... it was abuse. Abuse, Severus! And why am I calling you by your given name? What were we to each other?" My mind is blocking something from being accepted, why?

"I was your Mentor, Hermione."

"JANE!" I shrieked, throwing the wand at him. He took it and locked it in a box, putting it up on a high shelf.

"You came to me, frustrated and disheveled after Viktor left. You said he did things with you that you wouldn't be able to explain to anyone. I saw it in your mind, and in your body. You were in, what the community calls, sub-frenzy. You needed someone to exert their Dominance over you, someone you could trust, and that's why you came to me. I never took advantage of you; I simply gave you what you needed."

"Liar. I... had enough abuse in that hospital. Locked away in my own head, thanks to you."

"I'm terribly sorry for that; I simply did the best I could of a completely buggered situation."

I curled up in a small ball on the sofa, pulling a nearby blanket over me for comfort. "What happened to the Healers?"  _ Where's Scotty?  _ I thought to myself.

"Stunned but fine. O'Donnell really was trying to help you. Williams... he was under investigation before the regime change for authorizing the use of restricted potions on people. He seemed to favor narcotics, and even took bribes to prescribe it. He was supposed to answer to the Wizengamot for Brimstone abuse.

"After I had you in there was when I found out about the other business that was going on. Apparently some of the prettier patients were being rented out as sex slaves; I was relieved that I made you appear anemic and you kept being placed in isolation. It was one of the Healer Assistants, I'm sure."

My mind went back to how Scotty treated me.  _ His family was under investigation _ . He was, in the end, good to me.  _ I should go back to him. _

"Don't worry, you won't have go back there. You're safe here." he said, leaving the room.

"I'd rather not be locked up here, if it's all the same you."

Severus frowned at the doorway. He wanted to say something, but closed the door instead.

I was alone in here.  _ Alone is good. Alone means away from the bad stuff. _

Alone also means I can focus on the memories merging back into my mind.

* * *

The vertigo came back with a vengeance, and I fell out of the sofa with a resounding thud.

Severus ran into the room, concerned. "Hermione, you alright?" He asked, standing over me.

_ The pain and rage needed somewhere to go. He promised to help me, he had me on my knees, had me flying on waves of pleasure under his control for so long. He made me feel so safe until he betrayed it and locked me away within my mind, under the eyes of Bellatrix Lestrange. _

_ I had handed him the assigned 500 word essay explaining why I wanted to be his submissive, fully understanding that it would be a sexual D/s relationship. He already had my list of interests, knew my desires, and that I wanted it to be him who took my virginity. And I saw that he was going to decline my offer. _

_ The explosion of pain within my skull translated into the wooden chair he had been sitting in earlier exploding into pieces, the rubble burning with blue fire. _

He pulled out his wand to extinguish the flames, muttering about the state of his house.

_ Yeah, because that's what's important to you. Physical possessions. _

"Get out, Severus." I warned him.

"Don't burn my house down, Granger." He replied coldly. I staggered to my feet, stepping over a burning armrest.

"You can't tell me what to do." I spat, baring my teeth at him as my body fought to double over.

"I have never raised my hand in anger, but you are making quite the case for it." He threatened, his silky voice warming my inner parts. My body was still betraying me.

I took the moment and slapped him across the face. "Jane won't let you hurt her anymore."

Severus stood there and took the pain, his jaw clenched. He extinguished the fire, then sent ropes out to tie me up against the wall like The Vitruvian Man.

"Once you're clean of the residual potion in you, and you quit trying to destroy my house, I'll let you down. Until then, you can remain tied up while you throw your tantrum, Jane."

Severus left the room, and instantly the walls changed. They became padded, just as when I was in the hospital cell. It was comforting, and I relaxed as the ropes let go of me and I slumped onto the floor.

* * *

My mind was alert enough to realize that Severus came back in and put a blanket on me and put a pillow under my head. But I was unable to respond; I had worn myself to exhaustion and wanted to succumb to the darkness.

I was kneeling, hands clasped behind my back in his office. He strode past me, his robes billowing inches away from me. His scent was warm and masculine; I wanted to bury my face in him and drown in his smell. He conjured a student desk and directed me to sit in it.

I sat down, and he placed a stack of parchment in front of me. "Miss Granger, before you lie a set of documents used in the BDSM community. The first set is a survey to see where your proclivities lie; what experience you may have with them, how willing you are to try certain things, and if said activity is something that you intend to only engage in with your current partner."

My eyes scanned the list; anal sex, asphyxiation play, body restraints, breast bondage, caging/confinement... it went on for three pages. Some of the listed activities were italicized and in a lighter ink. "This is much longer list than I expected, Sir." I responded, conjuring myself a pencil to mark my inexperience to nearly everything on there.

"This list is quite exhaustive, Miss Granger. Items that are written lighter are activities that either are on my hard limit list, or that I do not feel comfortable doing with you due to the nature of our situation. If I were your Dominant rather than your Mentor, that list would show more possibilities as acceptable. I thought you'd like to see what all is possible in such lists, and that you are allowed to mark things as a hard limit that you will never agree to. Most novices in this community make the mistake of allowing more to happen than they are ready for, and then feel guilt over giving their tacit agreement for what had occurred. In your instances with Viktor, you do not seem to feel any sort of guilt or shame for what you did with him."

"Why should I? We were both single and consenting. I could have refused his requests, but I wanted..." I replied, feeling a bit indignant. "Miss Granger, I am glad that you don't feel guilt or shame. Such thoughts of 'buyer's remorse' is usually a sign of a person not being ready to consent to being in a BDSM relationship, or in having the wrong person. If I may, when we are having discussions like this, you should feel like we are equals while we are negotiating our limits. May we call each other by our given names, Hermione?" I nodded, wondering how his name would sound on my lips. The list divulged a few things that I had experience with: Exhibition, Masturbation, and Forced Eye Contact. I smiled slightly as I marked those down for Severus.

"Severus, I have a question; how will I know if I enjoy certain things on the list if I have never experienced them? Hair pulling seems painful, and hot wax seems... barbaric." Severus closed the distance between us, taking the pencil out of my hand and lifting my chin up to lock his eyes on me. "Hermione, may I demonstrate how hair pulling can indeed be sensual?" He asked, his sotto voice resonating as the slightest quiver in my thighs.

"Yes, Sir." I replied, forgetting that he wanted me to call him Severus. Or is this one of those 'scenes' and we're not actually negotiating right now?

"Hmm. Good Girl." He swept his hand, fingernails tracing my jawline, and clamped his hand to the back of my head. My curls were laced through his strong fingers, and as he clenched and pulled back, I was undone. The quick tug sent a bolt of pleasure through me, and my feet slid forward under the desk until lost contact with the ground. In this moment, I was his. My knees were apart and slack; I was no longer focused on decorum, manners, or anything. The moment of pleasure was all that existed for me. He let go as quickly as he had tugged me into this ecstasy.

My eyes were half-lidded, and I had slipped halfway down my seat. Regaining my composure took more effort than I had expected, but the look on Severus' face was a whole new reward. He didn't enjoy beating and whipping girls for his own pleasure, but rather enjoyed seeing their pleasure as he brought it to them. "I... Thank you, Severus." I said almost breathlessly. His voice was rich and conveyed the promise for more. "You are most welcome, Hermione. Once you finish this list, beneath it is a contract. These are used between two consenting adults who wish to formalize their arrangement. It lists what safewords, or safe-actions, will be used to cease all activity at a given time. Though it carries no legal standing, many find such documents useful, and that is why I have left a sample copy for you."

I turned to that page, and nearly burst out laughing. "Your safeword is 'Umbridge'? I suppose I'd lose all interest in spankings when her name gets invoked." I looked back up to find him, but he was lost in grading a stack of essays. I returned to the lengthy list and finished filling it out, noticing his limits in a new way. He has put me in the most arousing situations, had me frig myself both in his office and again when I got back to my bed, but he wouldn't be having any sexual contact with me.

I realized at that moment, by knowing that he would refuse to have me in that way, that I desired him all the more. And that I would work to become his submissive.

I woke up, realizing that it was always me; that my overachieving Gryffindor-ness, having to know it all and understand it all, was what had gotten me into so much trouble. But is also repaid me with the best rewards.

* * *

Severus slowly approached me, with a bowl and a glass of water.

"Dobby makes the best stews I've ever sampled, but I thought it prudent that I deliver it rather than him. I'd hate to see my employee be harmed for something that wasn't his fault."

The guinness stew hit my nostrils and my mouth was watering. The headache I was feeling had receded slightly, but I knew that it was going to come back with a throbbing vengeance. "Why do you have Dobby here?" I asked, curious.

"Before you assume that I have a penchant for withholding people against their will, I properly hired Dobby away from Hogwarts after his presence was seen as too much of a commotion for him to work around other House-Elves. Dobby enjoyed the added incentives that I had offered, since I wasn't about to make the mistake of offering more money to him."

I delved into the steaming soup, grateful for the rich flavor. "What did you offer him?" I asked, trying to piece together the cold man I once knew with the warmer one that is emerging from my memories.

"An education. He wanted to learn how to read and write. Your attempt at raising the quality of life for House-Elves was commendable, but their enslavement is only compounded by the fact that they do not know any life other than that of servitude. They have to have their eyes opened slowly, and Dobby, the fluke that he is, must pioneer alone for now."

"You said something similar to that to me before." I replied, not sure about when or how. The water was indeed, and mercifully, only water.

"Indeed. It was when you came to me after Viktor. You needed something that you had never put words to. You had only known romance from how your parents treated each other, and sex was something that, from the descriptions of your fellow classmates, was something that you didn't desire. 'Inept boys with their fumbling hands reaching for that which they had no clue nor authority to deal with.' Your words, I recall. That you used the word  _ authority  _ perplexed me. You were at the height of frustration; you had no idea of the concept of Domination or submission, though you had indeed experienced it.

"You knew of no other kind of life. You had expected a boring romance, and hoped that whichever partner you married would be sexually satisfactory to you. However Viktor showed you passion in a way that you had never known or experienced before, and you knew that this form of personal involvement was for you. Though Viktor might write, he couldn't come visit as he was too busy with his Quidditch career and you were still in school. I never knew why you decided to come to me about this, but I was able to read it in your eyes and your body, and did what I could in order to quench your needs."

Severus looked solemn as he informed me of our past. His emotionless mask was on, and I didn't want to poke at it. I nodded my thanks as I finished the soup, and took the water over to the couch. It was my spot, warm and soft. I pulled the blanket over me protectively, and huddled in my spot.  _ Mine _ .

"Thank you for the soup." I replied, my skin feeling itchy and jumpy at our closeness. I took another sip of the water, and calmed myself as best as I could.

Severus took the long way around the sofa, and sat on the opposite end. "Are you feeling better? The potions should be wearing off by now."

I nodded, though I felt even more jumpy around him. I was his prisoner for now, but with the promise of being released to go back to my friends. "I can feel the headache wanting to come back, but I'm really eager to get out of here and back to Harry and Ron." My body was rocking slightly, knowing that it was nerves and not a chemical dependency.

Severus placed a bottle on the table in front of us. "Went to a muggle chemist. These pain-relievers should work effectively and not react to the lingering potions within you. If you wish to leave in a few hours, I will not stop you."

"Thank you." I said, trying to understand him. _ My jailer is releasing me, just like that? Does he really understand what I've been going through? _

"Severus, tell me. Honestly. Were we... romantically involved?" I asked, scared to know his answer.

"I cannot claim that, seeing as I was still your professor and  **_never_ ** touched you in such a way. However, there was an emotional connection between us as I mentored you. I had hoped, that after graduation and perhaps after the war, that we could progress in our arrangement. You were adamant that you would become my submissive before then." Severus' stoic face betrayed regret ever so slightly.

"Then how could you do those things to me? Wipe my memory, change my face and body, cage me within my own mind?!" I sobbed, pulling the blanket protectively over me.

"Hermione, I did what I could to keep you safe!"

"You made me  **_GINGER_ ** !" I shrieked, knowing that wasn't the main issue I had with him. At some point, I longed for the isolation that the hospital gave me. I wasn't around him as much. I didn't know I was betrayed horrifically.

I gathered my resolve, cast off the blanket, and reached for the box that held my new wand. "Jane wants to leave now. Give her the wand, and she'll find her friends on her own."

Severus hesitated, but unlocked the box. "You're referring to yourself in the third person, Jane. I never meant to inflict this kind of harm upon you. I will do what I can to protect you, but be careful, and do not speak his name. It has been jinxed to undo magical protections, as a way to find Harry Potter."

He lowered the wards on the room, and walked away. "You can apparate away from my back porch and avoid being seen or detected." He said over his shoulder. He muttered, "May Salazar protect your path."


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Trigger Warning: Disassociation. Mental instability.

I stood as I gathered my resolve.  _ I can leave right now, and be free of this. I can go. _

I knew I'd need a plan, provisions, and a disguise. Taking my wand... her wand. I suppose it's mine now, it feels like it wants to belong to someone who will fight. Passing through the doorway felt cramped, as if confining bands were squeezing around me in apparition. Dobby approached me with a knapsack, happy to be of assistance to a 'friend of Mister Potter'.

"Miss Granger, here are provisions for you; food, tent, supplies, potions, and a few products from the Weasley company."

I nodded my thanks, slipping the sack over my shoulders. I transfigured my robes into something that would appear to be a muggle backpacking, and went in search of Snape's back porch. Dobby seemed to understand, and lead the way.

"If you ever need Dobby's help, call on Dobby, and he will help you, friend of Harry Potter."

Something about his loyalty made me smile, and wonder how someone could be so dedicated to another. I thought I was dedicated to Severus, but now I couldn't understand why I had been in the first place. Going past the doorway, I looked back at Severus' home before disapparating away. The last thing I saw was his dark eyes, full of the sorrow I remembered seeing in St. Mungo's.

* * *

Diagon Alley was a wreck. Most of the shops had closed down, and there were street vendors who were selling quack remedies to ward off werewolves, or to disguise yourself 100 different ways. Stepping into an alleyway, I reverted myself to the wan redhead, but gave myself a bit more length, but kept it straight and limp for manageability.

I can't do anything about the eyes, though. I thought, leaving the enclosed space and running into a wall coated in fliers bearing my face as well as Harry Potter's. He had a 10,000 Galleon bounty whereas mine was only half that. Mudbloods aren't as valuable, it seems. I pulled out a cloak from my pack and pulled it on, surprised to see that it disillusioned me. It wasn't a cloak of complete invisibility like Harry's, but it would suffice if I stuck to the walls.

As I saw the ruined remains of Ollivander's, I could tell that it was ransacked. Wands would be in short supply now, and those without wands would be absolutely powerless. Rounding the corner, I ran into a haggard woman who was begging for money. I ignored her pleas, since she couldn't see me and I didn't have much money either. Not like I could go into Gringott's and ask to go into my vault. The sound of stinging hexes caught my attention, but I kept my head down as I turned to see what happened. Lucius and another man were hexing the woman for sport, muttering something about the infestation of the 'wandless', as she begged to be heard that she was at least half-blood.

"Turn yourself in to the Muggleborn Registration Commission and plead your case to Madam Umbridge. They will sort your kind out." Lucius spat at the wailing woman as she crawled away to relative safety.

The man alongside Lucius snickered. "Or you'll get the Kiss. Either way, good riddance to bad blood. Should we call the snatchers to come do a sweep again?"

"Good idea, Goyle. We should do all that we can to maintain purity in our country." The two of them walked past me, and I hugged the wall as the cloak flapped in the breeze they made past me.

_ oh god oh god please keep walking... _

As Lucius passed me, he stopped and turned his head back, taking a sniff. "Also order Diagon Alley to be scourgified as well. The Mudbloods and the wandless filth seems to be leaving a stench."

I paced over to The Leaky Cauldron, realizing that I'd probably be safer in the Muggle world at this point. Tom was still there, but he looked much worse for the wear. His place was empty, save for the three death eaters sitting openly at a table in their robes and left their masks on the table. They were hushed in conversation, while Tom was serving them drinks and food.

I took the opportunity and went upstairs to the rooms he would rent out, and snuck down to the end of the hallway to his office. His floo was open, so I took a fistful of powder and took the network to Saint Mungo's.

_ I have to know that Scotty and his family is safe. _

* * *

As I entered the Hospital, it also seemed a bit more scant, with posters emblazoned on the walls with official Ministry of Magic seals on them.

**REPORT MUDBLOODS**

The security teams here seemed to be stationed at the entrances and in the reception area; but they looked unprofessional. They are snatchers, looking out for non-purebloods coming in for treatments.

By the elevators was a listing of the top Undesirables... Harry Potter, myself, Rubeus Hagrid, Lupin Moony...  _ The ministry was hunting down the Order of the Phoenix. _

The elevator doors opened, and a haggard looking Healer stepped out, pulling out a pipe to smoke in the atrium. I quickly jumped into the empty car, and pressed the button for the fourth floor. A voice came over the elevator as I went up.

_ "First Floor - Creature-Induced Injuries... Second Floor - Magical Bugs and Diseases... Third Floor - Potions and Plant Poisoning... Fourth Floor - Spell Damage." _

The elevator dinged as it stopped, and I got out, hoping that I could find Scotty and make sure that he and his family were alright.

He wasn't here, it seems, so I needed to wait around until his shift began. This ward looked so much better in the main room, rather than the padded cell that I was in for the majority of my time here. But it did seem too bright, and this cloak wasn't making me entirely invisible.

So I snuck back to where I was detained, in the hallway just outside of my cell. My cruel hell,  _ my home. _

It would be so easy just to walk back into the room and close the door, locking myself back in here.

I shook my head; it's not the same. I got out of here, this was a bad place.

_ But Jane knows that this is her home. Jane was born here. _

My name is Hermione Jane Granger.

_ No, it's not! You're just Jane now! _

The battle within my head was too loud, and I slumped in the corner as I waited for it to calm down.

A Healer's Assistant went to the first door at the end of the hallway and checked on the patient in there.  _ How had I not taken the time to know the other patients here? _

_ Because you don't care about them, they are diseased and there's nothing you can do for them. Focus on protecting yourself! _

"Good afternoon, Luna." The Assistant said, checking off the clipboard on the door, "no escape attempts from you, right?" He asked, then his voice dropped to a mutter, "Or Bellatrix will authorize Dementors to patrol the hospital.."

The weak voice on the other side of the door cracked, and I knew it wasn't a good sign. "No escaping, sir. I'll be good." Luna Lovegood was a broken shell, and my heart hurt to hear it.

"Looks like once you're healed from the exposure of the Cruciatus Curse, you'll be remanded to Lucius Malfoy. Your body's convulsions should subside in the next hour or so." He looked downward, rubbing his nose with his wrist as he held back his guilt. "Try... to not anger them. I don't know if we'll get to heal you in time if this happens again."

She's here to be healed up and shipped back out to the Malfoys.  _ You can't stop it. You can't handle it. Let Jane take care of you. _

The Assistant slipped a meal through the bottom part of the door, noted it on the clipboard, and walked away.

_ Jane remembers the tines on the forks, and the door being an asshole. Doesn't she? _

I nodded, curled up and realizing that this place was the only place where I belong. She just sat there in the corner and waited for Scotty to come rescue her.

_ Jane can't be seen under this cloak. _

She nodded, pulling the cloak off, wrapping it around the knapsack and putting it behind her for padding as she waited for Scotty to come find her.

_ Jane's not supposed to have that wand. _

She nodded again, slipping the wand into the bundle and waited for Scotty to let her come back home.

* * *

"She's all yours for the next half-hour. You can't leave any visible marks, and I'll obliviate her when you're done. Where's the Galleons?" The voice sounded familiar, and Jane was slowly waking up in the corner.

"Shame you lost that last girl, I was willing to pay more for a Ginger Mudblood. But I bet Lovegood here will live up to her name." The portly man handed a small sack of Galleons to the Healer Assistant, and entered the small cell.

"Enjoy." Scotty said, turning and seeing her.

"Jane?" He asked in a panic.

_ Jane is more valuable here; Jane is wanted. Jane wants to stay here with Scotty. _

"Scotty?" came the reply. Jane stood up and ran to him, throwing her arms around him in a tight embrace.

"You came back..." He wondered, almost apprehensive.

_ He's upset at you; Jane doesn't want to make him mad! _

"Jane missed home." Jane replied, squeezing him in a firm embrace. "Jane came back to Scotty."

Scotty seemed to understand what Jane meant, and opened up the door to her cell. "Back you go, Jane. It'll be okay; I just need to figure out what to do, alright?"

_ Something nagged at the back of her... my? head. Family. _

"Scotty, is your family okay?" Jane asked.

Scotty smiled to her, closing the door to the padded cell. "They are, thank you." His eyes seemed to frown;  _ Jane is confusing him. Jane is making him nervous. _

_ Quit thinking. It leads to bad stuff. _

_ Jane is home now, and happy. Back to the darkness and isolation. _


	7. Chapter 7

Muted in the distance, a pair of voices could almost be heard. But it had no meaning.

"We were in so much trouble when she left, how are we going to just up and say she's back?"

"Doesn't matter; she's a valuable commodity. We'll just say she was walking around the hospital for the past day or so. We didn't really lose her if she didn't leave St. Mungo's, and there's no proof of her going out any of the exits."

"Ugh, Scotty... you're a decent businessman, but you know bollocks all when it comes to the nuts and bolts of how a hospital works! Think Healer O'Donnell will be able to cure her and send her off before we can rent her out?"

"The bint's gone all third person with her fake name... I don't think that there's anything left of who she was in there. So much the better; she'll be much more compliant."

"I can't believe I got into this with you."

"You're getting forty percent, so shut the fuck up and be glad that this is bloody foolproof!"

Jane curled up in her corner, her eyes looking to where she used to collect plastic fork tines. It seems silly now, and she giggled at it.

_ Isn't it nicer in here when you don't think? _

Jane really likes it here when she doesn't have to think. Jane gets food and clean water when she behaves.

Jane curled herself up in the corner, wished that she had the pillow and blanket that the Dark Cloak gave her. Instead, her mind wandered as her eyes went dark.

* * *

 

"You will sit in your chair, legs folded as if you were sitting on the ground. Hands behind the back of your chair; I will take care of the rest." Severus' voice was husky, and it happened when he was quite pleased.

The wrists were bound with leather cuffs that were linked with metal clips, forcing my posture to change and pushing my breasts out more. His eyes running over me didn't scare me as much as it excited me. "Now, I'm going to remove your knickers..." And with a flash from his wand, they were gone. I was in my Gryffindor Robes, complete with Prefect Pin.

I could feel the cold draft of the dungeon slowly chill my quim, and places within me tightened as my hips urged for attention. Severus presented me with a small box, and opened it to show me two glass marbles, each containing a blue flower within them. Using his wand, he cast a cleansing charm and levitated them in front of my eyes.

"Miss Granger, I am going to put these inside you and you are to hold onto them. This is a kegel exercise, and if you are successful in holding them inside yourself, I shall reward you greatly." As he moved his wand, the two marbles began to push their way inside of me. They were deceptively small, for they felt much larger as they resided inside my channel. I was unable to do anything but clamp down on them and hold them inside me, and the forced tightness, mixed with the absolute naughtiness of doing this while still in my school robes, bought a wave of heat to my neck and chest.

I wasn't sure of how much time passed, since he didn't have a clock within sight and his office was entirely silent. But I closed my eyes, took a few steadying breaths, and found myself centered on the moment. I was there, experiencing it and just letting it take over me.

"Good Girl, Hermione." He said, as my eyes opened to see his latched onto my gaze. His lips were less than an inch from mine, and as I raised my chin to close the distance, the restraints at my wrists caught me from moving. My jaw trembled as I bit down on the urge to beg from him. My thighs were starting to tremble as he lowered his wand to my skirt's hemline and flipped the fabric up, exposing my soaking labia.

The tip of his wand was touching my clitoris, and I took a gasp in shock. "Sir...?" I couldn't make the question, or a sentence, or even a full thought. "Time for your reward, my little slut." He murmured a word and his wand began to vibrate, and I was unable to silence my shuddering. I couldn't move, couldn't stop it, all I could do was bear down on the glass marbles within me and it made the sensations feel even more intense.

* * *

 

"Hermione!" A panicked voice cut through, disturbing the dream.

My head was thrown back, lips parted to scream as I clenched my eyes and my jaw shut. He is a cruel, cruel, wonderful man.

"GRANGER! WHAT HAVE YOU DONE!"

_ Jane startled awake. Where is the voice coming from? _

_ Ignore that voice, you're home now. _

_ Jane is home. But Jane wants to see people, and the sunlight. Where is Scotty? _

_ He's not coming back until you behave. No more listening to that voice. _

"Hermione, I'm coming to get you. Just sit tight." The voice was behind me, and my fingers traced to a small bump behind my ear.

"There's no Hermione. Only Jane."

"Shite, Granger... I'll be there shortly." The voice behind my ear stopped.

_ That voice isn't supposed to be talking to Jane. Only this one. _

Jane nodded, as the sound of footfalls approached the door.


	8. Sanctified

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This Chapter is written from Severus' POV. His song, of course, is NIN's Sanctified.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's still getting worse after everything I've tried.  
> What if I found a way to wash it all aside.  
> What if she touches with those fingertips,  
> As the words spill out like fire from her lips?
> 
> [Chorus:]  
> And if she says come inside I'll come inside for her.  
> If she says give it all I'll give everything to her.  
> I am justified. I am purified. I am sanctified. Inside you
> 
> Heaven's just a rumor she'll dispel.  
> As she walks me through the nicest parts of hell (bitch).  
> I still dream of lips I never should have kissed.  
> Well she knows exactly what I can't resist
> 
> [Chorus]
> 
> I'm still caught up in another of her spells.  
> Well she's turning me into someone else.  
> Everyday I hope and pray this will end.  
> But when I can I do it all again
> 
> [Chorus]
> 
> As surely as the blade's course is run.  
> Maybe my kingdom's finally come.

Hermione was in trouble. She somehow got herself picked back up in St. Mungo's, and I could hear that damned Assistant Scotty haggling over the price of renting out Luna Lovegood to some sick Pureblood. I needed a plan, to be somebody above reproach and could simply march in and demand answers.

Dobby was sitting in the child-sized desk, his feet swinging happily as he was working on a workbook to practice on his writing. Seeing him gave me an idea, which simmered into a plan.

"Dobby, can you get into Malfoy Manor?" He seemed shocked at the idea, but nodded slightly.

"I wouldn't ask if it weren't important. I need some of his blond hairs from his brush. I am going to impersonate him in order to get into St. Mungo's and rescue Hermione Granger. There are some bad people who are selling the witches like they are... a form of House-Elf."

Dobby shook his head in disgust. "No person or elf should be owned or sold off. I will help you."

Dobby stood, snapped his fingers, and disappeared for almost five seconds. He returned with the hair, smiling. "Master Malfoy doesn't change his wards at all, and has no new elf. Sad state his room is in." Dobby chuckled.

"This means that we will need to dress like Lucius Malfoy and an enslaved house elf. Think you could pretend for a bit?"

Dobby nodded as he ran back to his room to change into a stained pillowcase. I went down to my laboratory and found my vials of unfinished Polyjuice. Adding the hairs, I took the foul potion and transfigured my dark robes into something a bit more dashing and colorful, fitting for the Malfoy Patriarch.

The look on Dobby's face when he saw me told me well enough that the potion was effective.

"Ready, Dobby?" He nodded, and he popped us to St. Mungo's apparition entrance. I sneered as I wiped my hand clean from touching him for the full Malfoy effect, and strode my way to the elevators.

The nurse at the reception desk looked at me in shock. "Good Afternoon, Lord Malfoy. Your patient is on the fourth floor." I didn't stop to reply, and used the replica cane that I conjured to hit the call button.

Dobby's eyes were scanning the entire place, glad to put his latest skill to work. "Report Mudbloods... Usurpurs of the Pureblood's Birthright... Muggles and the Danger they Pose to a Pureblood Society..."

We entered the empty lift, and Dobby pressed the button marked 4. "Thank you Dobby, how did you know Miss Granger is there?"

"Sir, I'm an elf. Those words I saw on the walls down there, they are lies, aren't they? Master Malfoy kept mentioning such things yet Miss Granger proves them wrong."

I nodded slowly. "And people who are so stubborn to believe such lies would rather see Muggle-borns killed than to be disproven. Though I have noticed a pattern of Squibs being born into Pureblood families that are vehemently Anti-Muggleborn."

The elevator dinged and the doors opened, and I strode into the lead while making Dobby cower behind me as the enslaved House Elves are wont to do.

"Lord Malfoy! You are early; Miss Lovegood isn't ready... yet." This assistant never worked on the same shift as I had, but he knew Lucius. And apparently he was expecting to hand over Luna soon.

"I will see her now." I stated, full of the confidence that Lucius would be wielding since he now as good as owns the Wizarding World.

He cowed, bowing slightly as he lead me to the darkened area of the Spell Damage ward, where the padded cells never received any light. As he lead me into the hallway, I noticed my disillusionment cloak in the corner was covering Hermione's backpack and the wand I gave her. I passed up the assistant and stopped between him and the corner, and Dobby was able to see the items as well, collecting them in his arms as I provided the distraction.

"Hey, Scotty! Lord Malfoy is here for his... Lovegood." The wet, sloppy noises followed by gagging coming from the room let me know exactly what he was doing to her. My face had to look bored and impassive rather than livid.

"Yes, Scotty, be done with her already and make sure that you Scourgify her." My grip on the cane handle was white with rage as my face looked relaxed. There was a white flash of light from the Obliviate spell hitting hits mark.

The Assistant looked at me guiltily, and felt the need to apologize. "We were simply told to heal her up and send her back to you, but MacNair offered us a bit of gold for a turn with her, and we couldn't exactly deny him. It sort of turned into a business."

I looked at him without any remorse or anger. "I'm not about to pay for the right to cavort with my property. However, I have heard that you might be holding a ginger? Shame it's not that Weasley girl, but..."

He nodded quickly, guiding me over to the final cell. "She's a bit of a feisty one; she had given us the slip for a day but then she just up and returned to her 'home'. Our basic rules are that you can't do any lasting damage that can't be fixed with a quick charm. Ten Galleons an hour."

I opened my purse and handed him the gold. "Elf, take the Lovegood girl back to my home. I will see you in an hour, and make sure that dinner is ready." I sneered as I ordered him around, effecting the best Malfoy I could.

The Assistant opened the door, and my eyes fell upon the scrawny ginger, her head and eyes askew and focused on a point that didn't exist. "We don't know her name, but she responds to Jane all the same. When she can respond." Her hair was longer than I had made it, and it was sticking out at odd angles. She wasn't taking care of herself at all; something had cracked and I wasn't sure it could be repaired.

"She will do, thank you." As the Assistant closed the door and began to cast a silencing charm, Scotty was livid at his partner's sale.

"I was going to bugger her first! We don't even know what she'll do..." The voices faded, and I pulled out my wand and cast lumos.

"Miss Granger, Jane!" Her name is Hermione Jean Granger, but she's referring to herself only as Jane now. Her eyes raised slowly, taking me in.

"Sir?" Her eyes were glazed over, and she wouldn't recognize me even if I weren't polyjuiced. She looked around the padded cell, and craned her neck back to face me in an unnaturally slow fashion. "Am I to please you?"

She knelt, sitting on her feet and put her hands behind her back. She was assuming the submissive's kneeling position that I had taught her, and it wasn't as sexually enticing as it once was. It was horrific, the look of resignation as she opened her mouth slightly and mentally retreated within herself. This wasn't the young woman who had offered herself freely weeks ago. I remembered our last session before it all fell apart.

* * *

 

_ I had unclipped her wrists from each other, letting her move her arms freely after making her scream through an orgasm at wand-point. The pair of marbles were still inside her, and I had forgotten about her previous lunges towards me when I had wound her up with sexual frustration. Her needs were satisfied, so I hadn't expected it. _

_ Leather cuffs hit either side of my head, as her hands clamped onto my head and pulled me in for a kiss, one so passionate it conveyed more than mere thanks for making her orgasm once again. _

_ I was startled into inaction for the first time in my life. I was simply her trainer; I wasn't to ever cross this line with her. But I savored the kiss as my libido and my feelings for her betrayed my better judgment. _

_ That's when she said the words that would be my undoing. When I should have stopped everything, called my safeword, and sent her away. Instead I completely gave myself over to her. _

_ "Thank you, Master." I kissed her with a fierceness, my body and my emotions all for claiming her as mine. My own hands ran over her skin and embraced her as she was still in the chair where I placed her. My arms wrapped around her as her legs wrapped around me and I carried her away from the chair and laid her out on my desk. Her arms frantically shoved everything off, arching her back with need as she began to frantically undo her tie and unbutton her blouse. _

_ As I lay over her prone body upon my desk, my face buried into her now exposed breasts... I found myself, and my self-control. And her whimpering was matched by my aching erection wanting to be let free. _

_ "I'm sorry, Hermione. I'm not supposed to lose control like that. Please see yourself to your room. I will contact you shortly." _

_ But I hadn't. She came back to me, with the news about Draco. When the alarms went off. When the school was invaded by Death Eaters. When I had to go kill Albus Dumbledore. _

* * *

This wasn't what I made her into, and my blood burned with rage for what happened to her while she was here. I sharpened Hermione's need, supported her and watched her excel as a submissive. She was glorious in her submission, whereas this is a horrid mockery of everything we once had.

**_I will kill them all for this._ ** I swore, my palm bleeding on a sharp point of the cane's head.

"No, Hermione. It is I. Severus." Her eyes had a faint flash of... something. "Stand up, Miss Granger."

She stood. "Good girl. We need a way out; I doubt I can flood the hospital again."

Her mouth tried to move, but she was too catatonic. Almost silently, the name could be heard escaping her lips. "Sir, call Dobby."

Dobby arrived instantly, and took our hands in his. "Master Malfoy just arrived on the bottom floor, looking for his Luna. We must go." And we were popped through the nothingness and back at my home.

Luna was sitting at the table, sipping a cup of tea as if nothing was wrong. "Good Afternoon, Headmaster. Would you like some tea?"

Hermione fell back down into the submissive kneeling position, but with her mouth closed this time. "Scotty and Healer Williams really did a number on her; I overheard them arguing over her dosages."

I looked at her incredulously, knowing that my Polyjuice Potion had worked perfectly. "How did you know, Luna?"

"Severus Snape is the only person alive who has hired Dobby. Most witches and wizards don't notice other creatures like I do. More's the pity."

I nodded, understanding her for once in her blasted life. "Hermione has been under a lot of stress, and had her memory modified extensively. But I believe we can restore her by introducing her back to those who love her." She looked at me with a level of understanding that scared me. "Try talking to her, sir. Maybe we can get Dobby to bring Harry and Ron here... but not let them know that this is your place, or about you at all. They are convinced that you're evil, despite how much you've done to protect the students this year at Hogwarts from the Carrows."

I went down to my knees in front of her, locking eyes on her. Hesitantly, I looked inside gently as I called her name, invoking Legilimency.

"Hermione Jean Granger, it is I. Your Master Snape." I didn't bother to look at Luna's reaction to that; it wasn't important. Her hand was on my shoulder, consolingly.

"She's in there, Headmaster Snape. Let me try." She took Hermione's hand in her own. "Hey, it's me, Luna Lovegood. Can you come out and talk?"

Hermione's eyes traveled slowly towards the Ravenclaw, as if being dragged there. "Jane wants Snape gone. He hurt her. He's a bad man."

"I'm sorry, but he rescued you from Scotty and Healer Williams."

"I want Scotty. Where is Scotty?" Hermione's throat was flat and hollow.

Luna looked at me with pity. "Go back to Hogwarts; Dobby will bring Harry and Ronald here, under my request, and we'll take care of her, and be off shortly. Thank you for saving us, Headmaster Snape."

I had to give up on her for now. I never should have taken her under my tutelage, never should have kissed her, and I'd never feel this bad for all that I have done for her.

I nodded, turned away, and left my home for the hell that was Hogwarts.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Writing this one chapter from Snape's POV was really helpful... I had no idea how I'd have written that from the perspective of someone who completely retreated inside their own mind to avoid facing the reality of the situation. This is why the next piece is taking so long to refine and put out there, since I don't want to have to try and write from Luna's perspective, or (Salazar help me) Ron's.


	9. Chapter 9

The blond was talking to Jane like they were friends, and the large-eyed creature disappeared just after Snape did.

"Hermione? It's Luna. Luna Lovegood. Can I get you to come sit down on the sofa?" the blond asked.

"no hermione now, just jane." Jane replied, her voice weak and hollow.

"Okay, Jane, will you please stand and come with me to sit on the sofa? It's much more comfortable." Jane nodded and followed the blond Luna. The seat was soft and comfortable.

The large-eyed creature returned with a shaggy, brown-haired boy and a ginger boy. Jane used to own a ginger cat. His name was Crookshanks. The pair of boys exploded in smiles, and threw their arms open as they ran towards Jane.

"HERMIONE! You're alive!" They shouted, intent on hugging her fiercely.

Jane panicked, and lunged for her cloak and wand. She went to her corner, throwing the disillusionment cloak over herself and cast a shield charm to repel the scary boys coming at her.

The pair of boys stopped short of the invisible barrier, knowing for certain that she was huddled in the corner, under the cloak that they couldn't see. Luna approached them, speaking gently.

"She wants to be called Jane now; I think she was mistreated when we were at St. Mungo's." Luna moved around the pair, and knelt near Jane. "Jane, we are your friends. Do you remember our names?"

Jane nodded, but she remembered that they couldn't see that. She pulled back the cloak, and nodded again. "You're Luna. Harry's hair looks like an untidy mop. Ron's the ginger, like my cat, Crookshanks. Where is he?"

"Deputy Headmistress McGonagall has him at Hogwarts. He's safe there, charmed to look like a calico and has been temporarily renamed Menelaus. He seems okay, but misses you." Luna replied, holding her hand out out to Jane, palm upward. "We all are concerned for you. Dobby, would you please make her some food?"

Dobby nodded, running off to make a giant meal.

"I'd like a little as well, Dobby." Ron called out, and Jane giggled a little at that. Jane lowered her defenses and put her hand into Luna's, accepting her help to stand up.

"So, Harry, I'd like to hear what you've been up to these past few months." Luna asked politely, walking them to the dining room and serving them butterbeers from the icebox.

"Oh, um, just... fighting Vold... you-know-who. Can't really talk about it... well, Dumbledore told me not to, but he seemed big on keeping secrets, including from me. We're looking for special items, ones that would have been seen as valuable to him. We think he's done some horrific magic to make himself nearly immortal by slicing up his soul and effectively pinning parts of it on this side of existence." Harry rambled.

"Sounds like you're looking for a Horcrux." Luna stated simply. 

"uh...yeah. But more than one. There was that Diary that Ginny had in our second year that opened the Chamber of Secrets, and Dumbledore destroyed a ring. We have this locket here, liberated from Umbridge in the Ministry... but no idea how to destroy it." Ron added, gratefully gulping down his drink.

Jane took her bottle and sipped.  _ This feels familiar, you've got a job to do with these boys. _

"Luna, Jane's supposed to do something. Jane wants to see her cat. And Scotty." Jane added meekly. Harry and Ron looked at Jane sadly, but Jane didn't understand why. Luna's face turned red and slammed her hand down, whipping her wand out at Jane.

"Scotty was a bad man! He hurt us while we were there, and the Healers didn't know or care that we were being poisoned! Repeat after me: Scotty was a bad man!" Luna said in fury.

"Scotty's not bad; he never hurt Jane.  _ Jane was good _ , Snape was the bad man who stole me away from Scotty." Jane answered, starting to rock in her seat.

Harry and Ron stood in shock, unsure how to step in.

"Jane. Did Scotty hurt Hermione? Let Hermione answer, not Jane." Luna asked forcefully.

"Jane protects Hermione. Hermione was betrayed, hurt, scrambled, and wiped. Hermione was fixed and forced to remember, but doesn't want to. Jane is here."

"Who hurt Hermione, Hermione?" Luna asked again.

_ Don't answer her, let Jane protect you. _ No, this has to come out. The bottle was seized and gulped quickly.

"Snape hurt me. I... found out, before it had to happen. I saw it happen when Harry left for Pomfrey when Albus asked for Snape." The dam broke, and my eyes let forth the deluge that was repressed for so long. 

"Snape was ordered to kill Albus, and I was too brilliant not to see through the ruse. I loved him, and he knew we couldn't be together and keep his role under You-Know-Who. I saw him kill Albus, so he hid my memories away from me, disguised me, and scrambled my ability to communicate so I wouldn't accidentally reveal the plan. I was named 'Jane Doe' in the hospital, and I... let Jane take over. I'm so sorry." A massive weight was pulled off of my chest, but I wasn't able to stop crying.

"Healer Williams had all of his potions spiked with lust potions, and your self-imposed vacation from eating and reality gave Healer O'Donnell the evidence that something was up. Scotty... was renting out the prettier, or more popular, girls that were there. Scotty sucks at obliviation, and I didn't want him to try any harder and really mess up my mind. I just pretended that I forgot what horrors I went through with the Carrows, and the other Purebloods who wanted a piece of Looney." Luna stated stoically.

I shook my head at that. "Scotty was never that way with me... he threatened me once, but apologized because of his family was being questioned as to blood status." I replied. Dobby set food and plates on the table, and the boys lunged into action.

Luna’s gaze made me freeze in place. "He  **_lied_ ** ; Ministry employees were the first to be purged if they had a single mudblood in their history. If he was working there, he was a Pureblood."

"You saying Snape's on our side, and hid Hermione to protect his cover?" Ron asked, his mouth partially full with food.

Luna nodded. "He assigned Ginny detention with Hagrid in the Forbidden Forest instead of target practice with the Cruciatus Curse with the Carrows at the start of term, before I was kidnapped by Malfoy. He's done nothing but protect us, and he visited St. Mungo's once Jane showed up. You looked horrible, by the way. But it was a great disguise, and you couldn't admit you weren't a pureblood.”

Harry looked about the house, and his eyes turned to Dobby. "This is Snape's home, isn't it?"

I nodded. "He rescued me from St. Mungo's twice. I was foolish enough to go back for Scotty. I didn't know he was hurting the other girls; he seemed like the nicest guy there."

"They usually do. Now, eat up, Jane. You'll need your strength." Luna advised, and I complied.

* * *

As I delved into and enjoyed the food, Jane was listening to Luna and Harry talking in the kitchen.

"Why is Hermione calling herself Jane?" He asked, "Is she going to be okay?"

"She disassociated from herself to cope with the extreme isolation she had; if her ability to communicate was scrambled, she was alone in her own head. You get to talk to Ron everyday, even about the most inane things. Even if you didn't talk for an entire day, you know that you could talk to him. She didn't even have that.

"Not to mention, we were getting dosed with lust potions, and though she didn't get rented out like I did... her body was begging for release and there was no way to get it through. I thought I had it bad, getting beaten and my body betraying me as I yearned for Nott to do his three minutes of unsavory thrusting. I at least understood what was going on and knew who I was, and could call Scotty a fucking bastard before he tried to obliviate me." Luna replied. Her voice sounded flat, and truthful.

I had not been paying attention to Ronald at the table. Jane seems to still be taking over.  _ Am I supposed to know about Jane? Is Jane not ready to let go of me? _

"Hey, Hermione..." Ron asked again.

"I... yeah. I'm here. Sorry, I was... thinking." I replied, but Ron seemed to know better. There was something else in his eyes as he saw me now.

"We're having no luck on how to destroy a Horcrux, since we can't just seem to run into any spare basilisks for their venom. Hey, do you really think Snape is on our side? Do you think he'll let us sneak in and get some of the venom down in the Chamber of Secrets?" Ron asked, stuffed yet looking at the dessert.

"Um... I wish we could ask Albus how he destroyed that ring, without getting cursed that made his arm wither away. And yes, I do... but we can't be seen at Hogwarts. We can't be seen anywhere. How have you two survived not getting caught so far?" I wondered.

"We barely escaped Bill and Fleur's wedding, and Dad sent me a patronus to go to ground, and that he found out that the Ministry jinxed You-Know-Who's name, specifically to find Harry and others who do use the V-name. It breaks down every protective enchantment and places a beacon on the site where the word was uttered.

"We had a theory, that in order to jinx one name to do all that, another had to have been chosen to do the exact opposite. So far, we haven't figured out a name that might work that way, so we just threw together every spell listed in Hogwarts, A History." Ron blushed as he said it, letting me know that he actually finally read it.

I smiled at his craftiness; he finally started taking studying seriously. Harry and Luna came back to the dining room, and I was struck with inspiration.

"Harry, what was the names of Tom's parents?" I asked.

"Tom Riddle and Merope Gaunt." He replied, and a crackle of magical energy pushed outwards, sealing and securing the house.

"Dobby," I began, my voice shaky after the protective barriers went up, "inform Severus where his house exists, and that we have secured it as a Safe House." As Dobby popped away, I explained.

"The house is more than likely invisible to everyone not here, and a fidelius charm would have been added as well." Ron and Harry nodded.

"Glad to have you back, ‘Jane’. I've gotta tell Molly and Ginny about this!" Harry said excitedly, jumping to find a piece of parchment and a quill.

"Harry, you can't. They aren't looking for Snape's house, and they'll notice if a home that is under surveillance instantly disappears! This is an advantage we can't share or else we'll tip our hand, and they'll change the name!"

"But they're like family!" Harry exclaimed, "Maybe you forgot what it's like for the Weasleys! They are blood traitors and are actively being sought after by the Auror department!"

"'Mione, they are  **_my_ ** family. I don't want to see them dead and their house burned down like your parents were!" Ron's outburst earned him a slap in the back of the head by Harry.

_ My parents? _ A cold stab went through my heart.  _ You're not ready to take over, let Jane be here for you. _

They did all they could to support me, and brought me into the magical world. And my intelligence and my friendships cost them their lives.

"Jane? Oh, Merlin, you didn't know." Luna said softly.

My eyes went distant, and tried to capture the image of my family in my mind before it was gone again.  _ Jane can handle this, Hermione.  _ Her head tilted, and her mind resigned herself back to the hell she had found comfort and solace in.  _ Jane could handle this better. Let her take over. _

"Okay." She said out loud to Jane, and let emptiness take over. The three people in front of her didn't know how to react, but knew that something had happened.  _ It didn't matter anymore _ . The friend of theirs that they came to save was hidden once again, safe away from the horrible reality that threatened to exist around her.


	10. Chapter 10

"Jane, I want you to take this potion. It's a calming draught, and it's perfectly safe." Luna said to her, but Jane kept her lips shut tightly.

"Look, she doesn't want it. We'll just have to slip it in the next time she wants some water or something." Ron suggested, shrugging his shoulders.

Jane and Luna glared daggers at the ginger boy, waiting for him to apologize.

"What? I'm just saying, she's not going to want to take it willingly, we're just going to have to make sure she takes it." Ron didn't understand, and even Harry understood enough to look at him in horror.

"Ron, that's all that these girls have dealt with for the past few weeks! Being forced to ingest stuff against their will, not letting them have any choice. Jane, you've suffered a lot of trauma, and then we added on top of it by not breaking the news about your family to you gently. The Draught will help, and it was made properly by Snape..."

Jane shook her head, quickly and violently.  _ No Snape. _

"Oh, Merlin." Harry sighed, "Luna, her eyes seem... distant."

Luna nodded sadly. "And she's quit talking again. What do you want to do with her?"

"Keep her with us, naturally. Something tells me that if we get ambushed, she'll still remember how to defend herself and us with her wand. Jane, do you still want to help us in finding the Horcruxes and destroy You-Know-Who?"

Jane nodded, lifting her eyes to look at the other people finally.

"That's a good girl." Luna said proudly, beaming at her.

Jane smiled back, remembering better times when she was told that.  _ When her hair was tugged till her breathing went ragged, when her red, raw skin tingled with pleasure time after time. When she would kiss the leather strap before it struck her bum and quim as she begged for release by her Master's hands... _

"Jane wants to be your good girl, Sir." Jane replied, almost automatically to Luna. She realized that something was off, as Luna's face didn't smile warmly as she recalled in her memories.

"Jane doesn't belong to you, does she?" Jane asked, sad to see Luna shaking her head solemnly.

"What? Nobody owns you, Hermione!" Ron exclaimed, bewildered at this.

"Ron, shut up. I read a book about this sort of lifestyle arrangement. If the girl we once knew had 'belonged' to someone, it was entirely consensual on her half."

"But she said 'Sir'! And she was spending a lot of time with..." he paused for some reason, "...that bat of the dungeons, you know?" Harry seemed to understand the nickname. Jane didn't.

"Jane, you don't belong to me, but I'll take care of you until we find your Sir." Luna offered, and she nodded happily.

"I'll be good to you, and you'll let him know I was good. I can't recall his face though. Very rich and sexy voice, though. He has my collar; couldn’t keep it. Mustn’t tell." Reaching for her wand, Jane produced a simple black leather chevroned collar. She ran her left hand over it. "I've felt naked without it. This is better, for now."

Jane didn't know that the collar she conjured had a medallion on it, engraved with the initials SS.

* * *

Luna looked at the Golden Trio, and understood that they were missing the brains behind the operation.

"What would your friend be doing right now, Harry?" She asked, pulling out a muggle pen and a small notebook.

"She'd be making a list... planning out what we have to do and when we can do it." Harry said wistfully.

Luna nodded, and started to do just that. "Alright, Horcruxes. Plural. We need to figure out how many, what they are, and how to destroy them. What do we have?"

"Harry believes what Dumbledore told him; You-Know-Who split his soul seven ways. The ring that Albus destroyed, the diary that Harry stabbed are two that we know of. This locket is one. The working theory is that each one will have a connection to the four houses. Which leaves something of Gryffindor's, Ravenclaw's, and Hufflepuff's. And the seventh bit of his soul is still in Tom's body." Ron stated plainly.

"The only thing of Gryffindor that we know if is his sword, and if the Headmaster used that to destroy the ring horcrux, then she sword itself cannot be another Horcrux. As for Hufflepuff, we're thinking that's Helga Hufflepuff's Cup. No idea where it is now, though. Oh, and that snake of his, Nagini." Harry added, smiling a little as he watched Luna copy it all down.

_ Completed: Ring, Diary _ _   
_ _ Ready to destroy: Locket _ _   
_ _ Still to find: Hufflepuff's Cup, Nagini _ _   
_ __ Unknown: Something of Ravenclaw's (Diadem?) or Gryffindor's.

"So how were the ring and the diary destroyed?" Luna asked, "These things have to be harder to destroy, considering it's inanimate and has to house a soul shard."

"I used a basilisk fang on the diary, Albus used Gryffindor's sword on the ring." Harry replied, "But we don't have either of those."

Luna nodded, and added 'Sword of Gryffindor' to the 'Still to find' list. "Actually, that sword was made by a Goblin, and it killed the Basilisk. That sword has the venom impregnated into the very metal itself."

"That doesn't help, Luna! We still don't have any leads!" Ron yelled, stomping away from the table.

"Ronald!" Harry yelled, sighing as he knew that this argument was repeating itself again. "Luna, he does this. A lot. Bloody coward, he knew what he was signing up for."

Ronald ran back in, his wand drawn at Harry. "What. Did. You. Say." His face was closed, his mouth in a threatening sneer.

_ Jane needs to stop this.  _ Jane stood and placed herself between them, pulling her own wand out to put up any kind of barrier if needed.

"Harry, Ron, both of you, stop!" Jane shouted, not sure whom she could turn her back towards.

Luna tried speaking up. "Ron, take off the locket, this isn't you."

Harry drew his wand. "What did you expect Ron? Fine dining and finding a Horcrux every night? Go back to your mummy then and just 'recover' from spattergroit!"

**"HOW DARE YOU MENTION MY FAMILY! THEY ARE UNDER INVESTIGATION!"** Ron spat, red sparks coming out of his wand.

"Oh, they are in such a worse state than  _ having been killed sixteen years ago! _ " Harry said, livid at the ginger's audacity.

**"DROP THE LOCKET, RON!"** Jane yelled, her eyes burning with a fierce anger that they hadn't seen in years. Jane put up a protective wall, effectively shutting Ronald away from the rest of them.

"And you," Ron's voice dropped to a dangerous whisper, "the nutter who needs to be owned like a mongrel. Did you call Snape your 'Master'? Kneel at his feet and beg for him to love you, even though I've been trying to get you to see that I've loved you all this time?!"

_ He needs to know the truth. _

"Ronald, Hermione would never love you, not that way. Jane doesn't think much better of you right now, either. Drop the locket and lower your wand." Jane replied with an evenness she didn't know she had.

Ron ripped the locket off from around his neck, stomped off to the back door, and a sharp crack let us know that he had Apparated away.

Luna put her hand consolingly, as well as cautiously, around Jane's wand-wrist. "Are you okay, Jane?"

I nodded. "I think we're okay. Hermione's a bit sad, but Jane's here. Jane's always here."

* * *

The three of them sat in the silence, unable to know how to continue. Harry looked over the list Luna made, and his eyebrows furrowed. "What's a Diadem?"

But Luna was busy trying to communicate with her. Me.  _ I'm not sure who I am anymore. _

"Jane. Come on back to me. We need to get you to bed." Luna urged.

"Why did Ronald say that to me? Why would he...?" Jane replied, her throat feeling raw from all of her tears.

"He loved you. Sometimes it doesn't have to make sense, you just have to... accept it." Luna consoled.

"Why would he love Jane?" She said, surprised at feeling a tear run down her own cheek.

"He loved someone else. Who you once were, the 'insufferable know-it-all'. Say your name. The true one."

"Hermione." I replied, wanting to banish her away.

"Your full name."

"Hermione Jane Granger." I shuddered at the sound of it, the feeling of a vice threatened to clamp over my heart, and my hands went to my chest to subdue the pain.

"This might take a radical approach. I'm sorry." Luna apologized, and slipped her hand through the chevron-shaped collar at my neck. "Look at me, Granger." Her eyes met mine, and it was carrying a level of authority that started to unlock something within me.

"I'm Hermione Jane Granger..." I sobbed, and I felt her eyes and her mind enter mine.

* * *

We were in a dungeon, if that's what you could call it. It looked familiar, yet barren. The furniture was odd, yet missing pieces. The only thing that I could think was a coat rack was devoid of coats hanging from the hooks. And then there was the closet. It was in a corner of the torch-lit dungeon where no light would touch it, and the paneling wasn't the same.

Luna stood before me in the room, and as she went past each piece of furniture, it became finished. The odd bench had places for restraints, the coat rack sported different hanging floggers, and the closet...

"No... please don't go in there!" I begged, dropping to my knees. I knew I was doing this wrong, but I urged her to stop.  _ Nothing good can come of this. I'd rather not go there, and know that, and see what's going on. _

"Hermione, you were hurt, and your mind was forced to forget certain things, and after all that, you decided that there was something worse that was done to you. I'm here to help you, and you have to face your demons." Luna whipped out her wand, and ropes wrapped around my limbs, tying me to an x-shaped cross that was in front of the door.

"Don't be afraid of the past, and it cannot hurt you anymore. Do you understand?" She asked, and I shook my head. I clenched my eyes, and forced myself to not listen to her anymore. I don't want to face my fears, I don't want to know what I wanted... _needed to forget!_

Luna reached for and opened the door. Jane looked, and witnessed Hermione kneeling before her Severus, her eyes tearing up as she heard him speak to her.

"Hermione Jean Granger, I must, with much regret, decline your offer of submission at this time. It is not because you are not worthy, nay, I would be the happiest man alive to do so. But the war is coming to a head, and I must play my part." Severus said tenderly.

"I can keep this secret! DON'T TURN YOUR BACK ON US, SEVERUS!" Hermione yelled, straining to keep her submissive's kneeling position when it was obvious she wanted to reach for him and make him see reason. "I love you, and want you to be my Master." She pleaded, her eyes streaming tears. "I figured out what you must do, and I don't care! I'll be in love with the pariah of the Wizarding World! I belong to you, just as much as you wish for me! There is a balance between the Master and the submissive, and we love each other equally. Don't do this."

Severus' head dropped. "That is exactly why I must; it will be a liability for the Greater Good should our affair be known to either side. You must have a clear and level head after I kill Albus Dumbledore..." Between the two of them lay the dead and broken corpse of the Headmaster, having appeared when mentioned. Hermione must have been thinking about it. "How will everyone on your side react if you profess your love, and the nature of our relationship, to them?" Circling the kneeling Hermione were all of the members of The Order, and her own family, looking in horror and shame at her. They murmured about kicking her out, knowing that she could no longer be trusted. Severus was circled by the Death Eaters, as Nagini was slowly crushing him to death.

"I won't say a word!" She cried, and the apparitions dissolved to only the original couple, the submissive Hermione and her Trainer Snape.

He raised his wand to her, and apologized. "It's the only way. Obliviate."

Jane screamed as the memory was unlocked, throwing Luna out of her mind.

* * *

"Your name. Now." Luna said firmly.

"Hermione Jean Granger."  _ Jane is no longer needed? _

"Good girl. Let me go tuck you into bed." Luna offered, leading me to a spare bedroom.

I complied, knowing that Miss Lovegood would take care of me.  _ I had to trust her now. I have been damaged, but I now know why. I know why. _

"I don't know if I can forgive Severus for this, Miss." I said as she transfigured my clothing into a nightgown.

"In due time, dear. Now go to sleep."

* * *

 

I woke up feeling hollow, in a room that didn't feel familiar. My fingers traced a collar that wasn't a gift from Severus, but rather one I made for myself.  _ It was comfortable, and I knew that I wouldn't want to be without it. _

Severus was right; we couldn't be together until after the war, but he didn't have to do that to me. He had no right to conceal parts of my memory from myself, nor to imprison me as a nutter 'for my own protection'.

I understood that he loved me; I loved him more than anything else in the world, too. My arms tightened their hold on the warm body against mine, and my eyes flew open in shock. Luna had fallen asleep, reading a book to me. Tales of Beetle the Bard

She had taken care of me, and used Legilimency to make me face my past, and to break through the trauma that I was trying to hide from myself. I hadn't meant for this to happen, but I needed it and she had been here to help.

She stirred a bit, and I removed my arm from around her.

"Oh, good morning. Name?" She asked nicely, but the authority was still there. _ Is Luna a Domme? _

"I am Hermione Jean Granger, Miss. Thank you for last night." I replied, feeling a bit odd in responding as a submissive while lying on my side in bed with her.

Luna got up from the bed, and I noticed that she fell asleep in her clothes. She stripped out of them and changed into fresh clothing that was in a nearby dresser. I averted my eyes, not used to seeing a girl get undressed before me.

"I had Dobby bring my entire wardrobe from my father's home. I believe that we are close to the same size, so you don't have to be wearing the same thing." Her efficiency and logic was a salve to my fried emotions. I think she knew that, too.

"Thank you, Miss." I sat up, and noticed I was in a nightgown. "Did you undress me last night?" I asked.

"No, merely transfigured what you had been wearing. The spell should break in a few hours. Now get changed, and I'll go make a good breakfast for us while you go do our laundry. While we eat, we're going to compare notes and figure out the next step in our hunt for the Horcruxes."  _ Simple tasks, I can do that _ . Doing something to keep my mind off of Ron leaving...

_ "And you," Ron's voice dropped to a dangerous whisper, "the nutter who needs to be owned like a mongrel. Did you call Snape your 'Master'? Kneel at his feet and beg for him to love you, even though I've been trying to get you to see that I've loved you all this time?!" _

_ Why did he have to do that? _ I thought, wondering if he was jealous or appalled at my relationship with Severus.

"Hermione, stop that. Right now." Luna leaned over the bed, pulled me to sit upright, and forced eye contact with her. I swallowed hard, knowing that I need to focus on the tasks at hand. "Do not make me have to punish you. You would rather not know how creative an intelligent, sadistic Ravenclaw I am."

"Yes Miss. Sorry." I bowed my head deferentially, as a knock came at the door.

"You two up? Looks like Snape got a subscription to The Prophet... but there's not much good in it. You-Know-Who's running the Ministry and therefore the press as well." Harry asked through the door.

Luna looked at me, and my eyes met hers. I had thought that I would only obey Severus, because of his domineering personality and his voice. Now I knew better, and understood that I could work with other Dominants, provided that I respected them and that they weren't trying to harm me.

"Hermione, focus on your morning duties, okay? I'm going to go have some coffee with Harry as you take care of yourself." I nodded, and was rewarded with a smile from her. "We'll get you and Severus back together as soon as this war is over, I promise."

Luna left the room, and I could hear her telling Harry that I would be doing laundry shortly.

"So, she's just going to be like Molly for now?" He asked.

"She needs a task ahead of her; she always had her studying and examinations to design a life regimen around. Today is household chores, followed by planning how to defeat You-Know-Who. Tomorrow we'll be dueling, working out, and making sure we survive this war. She can't be allowed to focus on Ron's leaving or his declaration to her." Luna's even voice was soothing as I used cleaning charms on myself and changed into a jumper and pair of denims that fit quite well.

As I met them in the dining room for breakfast, Harry was cooking and Luna was making coffee. "I thought you were going to be cooking, Miss." Harry looked at me, and his small smile seemed to be hiding something.

"I used to have to cook for my aunt and uncle all the time, 'Mione. It's been awhile since I got to do this. Besides, I'm not sure how to use that device." He gestured to Luna with a French Press.

"Don't tell Snape, but making a perfect cup of coffee is much like Potions. Extracting a beverage from a bean and enhancing it with flavoring agents can indeed be an exacting art." She smiled as she poured a cup and set it on the table. The scent was heavenly. "I will be writing Severus and asking for his permission to make ourselves some medical kits; basic pain-reliever potions, bandages, essence of dittany... it cannot hurt to be prepared."

I nodded as I sat and sipped the coffee and looked over her notes. She had already scheduled today to be a day of planning and tomorrow to be a day of action and exercise. The coffee was sublime, and the back of my knuckles were rapped by a wooden spoon by Luna.

"Set up the laundry first. Coffee shouldn't go into an empty stomach." She chided politely.

"Of course, Miss." I got up from the table, summoned our dirty clothing, and set them to be cleaned and to hang once dried. It was a basic 'housewitch' spell, but the timing was key. Once I had that set up, I came back to a table that was set and Harry was serving the food.

As we ate breakfast, Luna told us about the lost Diadem of Ravenclaw, and Harry explained how Tom Riddle's first and only job was to find rare artifacts for Borgin and Burke's.

I was recovering, and I was healing. But I was also in the house of a man that I couldn't trust, no matter how much I loved him. And he had apparated into his kitchen, and helped himself to Luna's coffee.


	11. Chapter 11

His eyes were fixed on me, and I lowered my eyes away from him.

_ I can't talk to him, not yet, not now _ . Luna had noticed the change in my posture, and sprung to my defense. Harry's hand was cautiously holding his wand, while he tried eating a bit of egg with his left hand.

"If I hadn't already eaten, I would love to have joined you for breakfast. However, this coffee is superb. How are you all doing?" Severus asked, his eyes sweeping over the others.

Luna took his arm gently and directed him towards another room room. "Headmaster, allow us to talk in private." Severus assessed the situation, and nodded, following her.

"Let us adjourn to my study, Miss Lovegood."

Harry passed me the paper, and I saw that it was a Saturday. And he was right, there was little that passed for actual news besides that Harry and I were on the Ministry's Most Wanted list.

"We have to find the sword. Any chance we can borrow the sorting hat and I can just try reaching into it?" Harry asked flippantly.

"At least we can ask Severus to raid the Chamber for us." I offered, shrugging. His eyes widened at my use of his given name.

"You do love him, don't you? It's not just your need to..." He trailed off, not sure how to say it.

"Submit to him? No, if I need to serve someone, I could find a capable Dominant. Maybe even a Domme, Luna's been good to me in that way. A part of me wants to be with him, sincerely... but we can't be for now, and he's got a lot to make up for. I want to forgive him, but..." I felt myself wanting to shut down, but forced myself to stay here.  _ I am Hermione Jean Granger. _

Luna came back to us, and spoke to Harry. "Headmaster Snape needs to know how to get into the Chamber, and will attempt to deliver us the sword if he can. He's a Slytherin, so he may not be able to. Magical possession of an artifact seems to be an intricate problem."

As Harry went to talk to Severus, Luna sat next to me. "He is allowing us to use his private lab to brew potions to help us seek the Horcruxes, with one exception. His words, 'keep that blasted boy out of the lab if you value your own lives'. I think that was the closest he'd ever come to complementing our abilities in Potion Making, allowing us to use his own lab here."

I laughed softly, and heard Harry walking back towards us. "Don't worry, he left. Luna here seemed to explain to him the importance in him keeping his distance for now. He loves and missed you, Hermione. And he's remorseful for what he did, but has to focus on the mission for now. You were right, and he can be trusted. He... had me do Legilimency on him, and he shoved so many memories into me that Dumbledore told him to give me." He sighed, and crumpled up the Prophet in front of me. "He's a bastard, and now I know why Snape loathed him so much.  _ He ordered his own death _ , and used  **_my parent's death..._ ** "

Harry took a calming breath, and visibly centered himself. "Work on the mission.  **_Best idea ever._ ** So, what have you two figured out?"

"We can't rely on getting the sword, but we should be able to get the venom. No goblin-made metal in order to weaponize it, though." I said, making a note on Luna's paper.

"Harry, how did you even know that the Locket was on Umbridge in the Ministry?" Luna asked.

"Kreacher, the house-elf for the Black family. The fake locket was signed by RAB, Sirius' brother. Only person who was able to raid the house and fence it off was Mundungus, so I had him tailed and when he was captured I just asked him." Harry recited, proud of his work.

"Yeah, I get that, but how did you pull off a raid at the Ministry?" I asked, knowing how often his plans fall apart and I'm there to help him.

"I had the cloak, and nicked a bit of Polyjuice and sent Ron in as a maintenance worker. They are granted access everywhere, except that it was his day off and his wife was being interrogated by Umbridge due to her being a muggle-born. It was horrid, hearing her being accused of 'stealing magic'. It was worse than I had ever imagined. The courtroom was swarming with Dementors, I couldn't let them suffer. I don't regret breaking them out and leaving the stunned Ministry officials to the mercy of the Dementors. If anyone deserves the Kiss, it's Umbridge. And the Death Eaters masquerading as Ministry officials." Harry's recounting was almost bitter.

"Well, killing Nagini will be easier than an inanimate horcrux, except that she'll be attached to You-Know-Who. If the Diadem is indeed a horcrux, that's going to be locked up as tight as anything, same thing with Hufflepuff's cup. Where would you store something?" I asked.

"Gringott's, naturally." Luna replied, "They have vaults in there near the bottom, under multiple layers of goblin-made protection and magic."

Harry nodded, regretfully. "We can't just march in there and search every vault. We'll need to know where to go. And who to be. I've been thinking... our next step forward needs to be a step back. I want to see my parent's grave."

Luna and I nodded sadly. "It seems like a good idea, but you have to know that it's going to be a trap."

Harry picked up a book he had,  _ The Life and Lies of Albus Dumbledore _ . He used to live in Godric's Hollow, nearly neighbors with my parents. And there's a famous historian there, still. I want to ask her about my past, and Albus'. I need to know the truth about him, and his personal history with Grindelwald."

I shot up straight in my seat. "He defeated Gringelwald! It's in all of the history books. What do you mean, personal history?"

Luna frowned and answered my question. "There was evidence of constant correspondence between them, and Albus' father died in Azkaban for attacking muggles. It was rumored that the two of them were... involved. It's why Albus refused to kill him in the duel, and made it such an amazing duel, because Dark Magic was flying from both sides, but only one of them was attempting actually lethal magic. Witnesses stated that Albus was asking for Grindelwald's forgiveness, rather than having a righteous fury when he defeated the Dark Wizard. In fact, Albus Dumbledore won Grindelwald's wand in that duel, and has used it ever since as some sort of threat to whomever aspired to be the next Great Evil."

"Look, I'll just go by myself, under the cloak." Harry suggested.

"No way, Harry. Godric's Hollow could be overrun with snatchers, Dementors, and Merlin knows what else. We're going with you, after we've built a plan, perfected disilllusionment charms, and have first-aid medical kits just in case. And a lot of exploding potions, just in case." I replied.

"How about some of those Weasley products? Shield-cloaks, decoy detonators, and those sweets that make people really sick?" Luna asked, and Harry came back with a knapsack.

"I was their secret financier, remember my Galleon award from the Triwizard Tournament? They gave me lots of their prototypes ages ago." Harry smirked, letting us see everything he had.

"Brilliant. Well, Luna and I are going to do some brewing in Snape's lab today, but tomorrow we'll work on our spellwork and if we're ready, we'll go find Miss Bagshot." I replied, and Luna waved her wand, making our dishes go and wash themselves in the kitchen.

* * *

The potions were made easily enough, and Luna's firm yet compassionate nature kept me together as we packed together the first-aid kits. Every time my mind wandered onto Ronald's departure, or the impossibility of finding horcruxes, or that I was a wanted fugitive of a corrupt Ministry, Luna was there to get me to focus again.

As we had dinner, I was asked to assist with doing the dishes and in service, I was able to keep myself together. But my body was aching for...  _ more. _ I realized it as my right leg was bouncing up and down on its toes, twitching as I was eating. I was wound up, and needed to melt in that moment of sub-space aftercare.

The tap, tap, tap of my foot was loud enough for Harry to look at me with concern.

"Hermione." He asked gently, trying to get my attention. My eyes were lowered deferentially.

Luna had taken another approach. It was why I listened to her; she knew that I needed this firm direction. " **Granger** . Eyes on me." Her voice had a resonance that wasn't like his, but held a strength of character that I knew I could trust.

I turned my eyes to look at her, and knew that my jaw was quivering.

"What do you need from me?" She asked, her eyes demanding a response.

"I need pain, Miss." I responded, slumping my shoulders in shame. I knew I should be stronger than this, that I shouldn't need her like I do. I turned my face back to my plate, realizing that I was no longer hungry. Harry excused himself from the table, unsure if he should remain here. He took our plates off to the kitchen and started cleaning them.

My eyes were still centered on where my plate was, and I knew I was trying to shut down as I had before. A hand weaved through my hair, clenching sharply, and forced my face back to hers. A tear escaped my left eye, as I apologized for my weakness in needing her.

"It is not your fault for needing me. It's symbiotic; I've wanted to know how I could help you out ever since I saw your sub side come out. Now, Hermione..." She gently placed her fingers underneath my chin.

"What do you want me to do about this?" She asked firmly.

"Flog me, Miss." I asked, smiling slightly as the act of speaking up flooded me with relief.

* * *

Luna slipped her finger through the ring of my collar and pulled me to my feet.

"Follow me, Granger." She let go of the collar and turned away, leading us down to the bedroom we shared. She had transfigured a leather belt she owned into moderate-length flogger with about two dozen falls. She slapped her hand with it, and smiled appreciatively. She closed the door, and created two tie-down points on the inside of the door frame.

I was too impressed with her transfiguration abilities that I had missed her command. She had changed into a long-sleeved, midnight blue blouse with a high, mandarin-styled collar and a black pencil skirt. But when I noticed the cuban-heeled stockings and the elegantly sexy yet manageable heels, I felt oddly under-dressed. As she put her hair up in a bun, she repeated her command for me. 

"Strip. And stand in front of the doorway."

I wasn't sure how to react to this; I knew that I couldn't get flogged on my back and bum with my bra clasp in the way, and that I'd rather not be wearing denims for this. But seeing her as a sexy librarian made me feel like I should also be dressed up, as if I had to be just as stunning as her.  _ Am I being jealous or attracted to her? _

I began to take off my jumper and denims, and Luna charmed my hair up into a clip. My body froze, feeling nervous about this new level that I was taking with her. She undid my bra and slowly took the straps off over my shoulders, and the sensuality of the moment, the gentle sensation of her cool fingertips trailing on my skin, gave me enough courage to follow through.

I shrugged off the bra, wanting to cover myself with my hands. Luna's wand was already transfiguring my pants into something that was black and lacy.

"Hermione, I don't want you to be uncomfortable being undressed around me. You should know that you are quite beautiful and have almost a full cup size over me." She traced her fingers on my jaw, and I realized that I was craning my head into the sensation. I saw her eyes drop and take in my body, a small smile gracing her face.

"Headmaster Snape is such a lucky man. Now, please say 'yellow' if I'm going too hard, and 'red' if you need me to stop." She slipped a pair of leather cuffs and clipped them up to the restraint points on the door frame. She also cast a silencing charm on the room for our privacy.

My breathing went ragged as I pulled and felt the restraints keep my arms in place. They weren't held above my head, so I was able to lean towards the door slightly as I heard her turn on a wizarding wireless. It had a great rhythm, and as I recognized the song from a muggle band, some light slaps started to hit my back to the beat of the song.

The singer's voice was just deep enough, almost a tenor, and was about a guy who was attracted to a girl in school. But his attraction was stronger than he had expected, and she felt like she could identify with that.

Luna's strikes with the flogger were more of a thud than a stingy sensation, and she kept with the beat perfectly even as she increased the intensity of each hit.

_ I want to hold you close _ _   
_ _ Skin pressed against me tight _ _   
_ _ Lie still, and close your eyes girl _ _   
_ _ So lovely, it feels so right _ _   
_ _ I want to hold you close _ _   
_ _ Soft breath, beating heart _ _   
_ _ As I whisper in your ear _ _   
_ __ I want to fucking tear you apart

As the song ended, my pulse was racing and her hands were massaging my now sore back. I was nearly flying on the endorphins, and she set up a new song to play.

"You doing alright so far, Hermione?" She asked sweetly.

"Yes, Miss. I want more, though, please." I begged. I could swear she was smiling as she duplicated the flogger she had in one hand, and I could see her practicing her ability to use both in tandem.

"I believe this one will be quite therapeutic for you."

The song started slow, and so did Luna.

_ Don't, disturb, the beast, the temperamental _ _   
_ _ Goat, the snail, while he's feeding on the _ _   
_ _ Rose, stay frozen, compromise what _ _   
_ __ I will, I am

This was a song I had heard before, but never understood it nor accepted it as much as an anthem for my life until now. With each beat of the song came a flogger, and my endorphins made the song all the more alive to me.

As he sang that he would no longer lay down, play dead, or play your doe, I knew that I would no longer allow myself to fall victim to another. As the mood of the song shifted, Luna switched to both floggers simultaneously and began to flog me Florentine style.

I was nearly undone by the impacts and the sensation on my back. I was arching into it, shifting my weight as my bum and back were accepting the merging of pain and pleasure, and as the song finished, I felt undone. She unhooked me from the door frame, and pulled me into her arms, guiding us back to the bed and pulled a blanket over us.

I wasn't cold, but I felt like I was shivering with her arms around me. I was fulfilled and trembling, happy and relieved.

"Thank you, Miss." I whispered, savoring the feeling of being held possessively by another. What she and I had here wasn't as true as what I had with Severus, but she hasn't broken my trust. And I had no idea how to continue with him if I couldn't.


	12. Chapter 12

I woke to a gentle knocking at the door. Panicking, I reached for the bed sheet that was already covering me. Luna's arm was already covering me protectively. She was lying next to me, above the sheets, and still wearing the sexy librarian outfit.

"It's okay Harry, you can come in." She called out, and he opened the door. He saw us in the bed, shrugged it off once he saw Luna was clothed, and handed me a letter. As my arm came out to take the paper, he realized that I was topless underneath and covered his eyes, apologizing profusely. He is definitely the brother that I never had.

"Harry, it's fine. Who sent this letter?" I asked, trying to unroll it with only one hand. Luna tapped it with her wand, making it stiff-straight and easy to wield. "Oh, thank you, Miss."

Harry lowered his hand and sat on the bed, unsure if he would be allowed to. His brow furrowed at hearing the title I had for Luna now. "Um, it could only come from Snape or Ron." He offered.

_ Hermione, _

_ Ronald has come to stay with Fleur and I here at Shell Cottage. We asked him to send this letter to you since your location is secured with a Fidelius Charm. Smart thinking there. But there seems to have been some sort of falling out between the two of you, and he won't go into it, beyond saying that there's some other git in the way. _

_ I'm trying to get it through his thick skull that there are more important matters than whom you may or may not fancy, but seeing as you, him, and Harry have always been together since you all started at Hogwarts, well... I suppose that he thought you two would always wind up together. All that being said, don't feel like you aren't part of our family. We wish you and Harry all the best, and maybe by the time this war is over, our first baby can be your flower girl or ring bearer. _

_ Bill _

"Ron's with Bill, and his family might be under the impression that we're in love." I was unsure of how to feel about all this, but Harry's attempt at restraining laughter brought a smile to my face.

"Oh, that's... wow, Hermione. I love you, but like a sister. I suppose it's the only thing that they can guess considering..." He trailed off, not wanting to mention Severus.

"At least we know that Ronald's okay, though." Luna stated plainly.  _ Thank goodness for that, at least. _

"So, 'Mione, can I ask, um, about this?" Harry hedged uncertainly.

"I suppose. What about this?" I asked.

"You're... what did she do? Why are you doing this?"

"Yeah, I'm just wearing my pants. Luna used a pair of floggers on me; it helps me to have someone here I can trust to to help take care of me. I need structure in my life, and sometimes I need the clutter in my head to be cleared out." I replied to him, passing him one of the floggers that Miss had used on me.

"Was Snape your first? Was he beating you like this?"

I shook my head, blushing slightly. "Actually, it was Viktor. He restrained my wrists, put my wand in my hand, and asked me out to the Yule Ball. It was horribly macho yet sweet, since I could have untied myself at any time. But I liked it, and let him be in charge. As for Severus, he noticed that I was getting... twitchy like I was last night. He got me to admit what Viktor did to me, and gave me what I needed. Never even laid a finger on me, even though I wanted him to."

"Is it sexual?" He asked, his eyes trailing on how Luna and I were spooning on the bed. Luna pursed her lips, and tried to extricate herself.

"No, Miss. Please stay." I asked, clasping my hand over hers. "It doesn't have to be sexual per se. It was, in a way, with Viktor. Same with Severus, but he literally never even laid a finger upon me. It may have been because we were at Hogwarts. Luna is making sure that I'm okay after the flogging; there is a need to physically calm someone down after the endorphin rush after some kinds of heavy play. It's comforting, really."

Luna felt very still under my hand, as if she was hesitant over how I was going to reply concerning her.

"So, she's just doing all of this to take care of you and help you? What is she getting out of this?" Harry asked, as if he noticed a look on Luna's face. I tried to crane my neck around to look at her, but was directed by her to keep my eyes forward.

"Sorry Miss." I apologized, and wondered what I should be apologizing for.  _ Am I taking her for granted? _

"Actually, Harry," Luna interjected, "as much as Hermione needs to give up control to someone and to be given what she needs, a Dominant needs the submissive to trust them and let them have the control. It's a two-way road, in a way. Anyways, I should get up and design an obstacle course for us to practice our dueling in." Luna got off of the bed, smoothed out her blouse and skirt, and left the room.

My eyes lingered on the seams that went up her calves, and I felt very confused about our situation. Harry's eyes were on me, and I didn't like his frown.

"I think I'm going to write Bill back, and clear up this misunderstanding. I won't mention Snape, just that you and I aren't involved like that."

As Harry left the room, I realized that this was the first time I was alone in a room without anything to do. It reminded me too much of my hospital cell.

* * *

 

Harry came back in with a quill and paper, and was relieved to see me dressed again.

"Honestly Harry, does the thought that you might see me topless bother you that much? You're like the only guy that it wouldn't bother me if you did see me like that." I smiled at his silly, chivalrous manner.

"Well, I'd have to go back and tell Ginny. She might not be as understanding. Speaking of, I really want her to know that we're not dating or anything. But they're going to want to know who this git is, and none of us can say it's Snape." Harry frowned, unsure on how to start the letter.

"Bugger, I need to protect the truth with a lie. And make sure Ron doesn't let it slip." Then it hit me. "I can hex the parchment so when Ron gets it, he'll tongue-tie himself if he tries to tell them. I did it for the D.A. sign-up sheet. As for 'the git', I can just say Ron is overreacting to having seen Luna and I share a bed here."

Harry looked at me, frowning. "We can do that, but I don't think it's fair to Luna."

I let out a frustrated sigh, shrugging. "I don't have a better plan, Harry. Besides, we've got a war to fight, which is more important than to assuage an immature little ginger."

"I know Hermione, but Luna's been investing a lot of herself with you. And from what I can tell about you being a submissive, it's a lot like a relationship. You know why you and Ron never worked out? He never communicated his feelings to you. Luna's been there to listen to you pour your heart out like any boyfriend should. What's more is that she's apparently doing the right thing in helping you deal with this." Harry explained.

"Yeah, but it's not like she's into girls." Harry raised his eyebrows at me. "At least I don't think so."

"And yet she's being the perfect boyfriend to you, isn't she?"

I tried to think of a response, but Luna was standing at the door. "The room is set up for tomorrow, so are the first aid kits and water bottles. I'm going to go take a shower. Hermione, you and Harry go ahead and write Ron back. We can't let Severus' true loyalty get out. We'll be starting early, so don't stay up too late." She grabbed a towel and a bathrobe from her dresser and walked over to the shower. "And go ahead and say that Ron's overreacting, his family will buy that before thinking that Hermione's in love with Snape."

Harry began to write, obviously trying to avoid the situation.

"Miss? Are you okay with saying that Ron's overreacting to seeing us in bed together?" I asked uncertainly.

Luna nodded, "Want me to read another story from the Beedle book tonight?"

"I would, Miss."

* * *

Luna came out of the shower, wearing a Heather blue bathrobe and charmed her hair dry with her wand.  _ Her eyes are amazing _ , I thought as she braided her hair up.

I had already changed into my own pajamas, and was flipping through the book, choosing a story. Luna closed the bedroom door and slipped off her bathrobe, hanging it and went over to her dresser. My eyes darted over her, raising the book to hide my glances. She was thinner than I was, but she was also a prisoner of Malfoy Manor. She was right, I was a cup size larger than her. And she has really fair skin, along with cute dimples just above her bum.

_ Am I checking her out?  _ No, it's just comparison. She saw me in only my pants, it's only fair for me to see the same. Yeah.

"Hermione, see something you like?" Luna said, pulling her top on.

Harry was right, she's flirting with me! I gulped harshly,  _ I wasn't sure how to reply to her. _

"Uh... Miss?" I asked as Luna slipped into the bed next to me.

She extended her hands, gesturing for the book. "Which story tonight? I'm thinking The Fountain of Fair Fortune."

"Oh. That would be fine, Miss." I replied, relieved yet still confused.

As she began to read the story to me, I curled myself up on her side, resting my head on her shoulder. Luna has been such a stable rock for me lately, and she's done nothing but give of herself to me. As the three witches join up with the muggle knight, Luna put down the book and checked to see if I had fallen asleep. "Hermione, you still awake?"

I yawned, but nodded. "Yes Miss."

"Ah, okay. I wanted to ask if there was something on your mind." Shit, she knows.

"Miss, may I ask you a question?" She nodded sweetly. "What are you wanting from me? You've been... well, Harry says that I may have been taking you for granted." I tentatively put my arm around her, and she put down the book and held my arm.

"You've been in need for far too long, and I wasn't about to take advantage of you dear. Too many people have been taking advantage of us." She replied, kissing my forehead. It wasn't sexual, just... nice. Comforting.

"Miss, are you attracted to me?" I asked, unsure if I wanted to know. Actually, I knew that I didn't want to know her response. "No, don't tell me."

"Any Dominant should have some sort of emotional attachment with their submissive." She replied.

"I... thank you, Miss." She picked up the book and resumed the story as I fell asleep curled up with her.

_ Maybe this is as good as it can get. _


	13. Chapter 13

"Alright, Hermione, Harry... do you remember what Snape taught us in Defense Class?" Luna asked, the three of us standing in a room that must have been expanded with extension charms. In fact, the whole area resembled the large rock formation at Hogwarts where I had punched out Draco in our third year.

"That we should dodge rather that waste our magic and our focus on defensive blocking, Miss." I replied automatically.

"Correct, Hermione, but you do not have to call me 'Miss' during this session." I nodded to her statement, but calling her Miss is almost a second nature to me now. "Now, we're not about to do a full duel that will have us fighting for our lives today, so we shouldn't have to worry about our wands changing allegiance." Harry and I looked at her curiously, but shrugged it off.

"But what we will be doing is learning not only strategies to duel, but spellwork that you wouldn't normally use in a duel that will work. Look at the area, and see what you can do here to change the environment to increase your chances for survival. I'll try not to hurt you too much, but that's also why you have the first aid kits. You two have three minutes to get ready." Luna skipped off, and we lost her behind the tree line near the large stones.

"Blimey Hermione, do you think she's going to hurt us?" Harry asked.

"I really think she might. You haven't seen her with a flogger." I shrugged. Harry's eyes flicked to me in a questioning manner.

"Just tell me if you piss her off, because I don't know if I ever want to see her angry." Harry replied, attempting to disillusion himself. I corrected his incantation and we were disillusioned as a loud bang echoed through the room.

"That's our three minutes, Harry." In a quick succession, a half-dozen purple jets of light shot between Harry and myself. His quick Quidditch reflexes had him flat against the ground, crawling behind the nearest large rock for cover. As I tried to get myself behind cover, another spell grazed my shoulder and burned through my shirt, searing my skin slightly.

"FUCK!" I yelled, crawling behind a different stone, pulling out the dittany patch to slap onto my shoulder. Harry was about to run over to me but I waved him off.

"You okay, 'Mione?" Harry yelled out. The rock that Harry was behind exploded into rubble, and Harry had to run in order to not get pelted by the falling stones.

_ Shutup, Harry. She can hear us _ . I ducked my head around to try and find where Luna was casting from.

Harry sounded like he was trying to use the 'point me' spell, and was rewarded with a nearby tree falling near him. "Bugger, she's not trying to hit me with the spell, she's hitting the stuff around me!"

I cast Hominem Revelio and had a good guess at which area she was in. Harry started to run into the forest and Luna transfigured the hard-packed earth into a swamp, slowing him down and having to swim across. But I saw where she was casting from, and used the Banishing charm as strong as I could to throw the tree across the field where Luna was at.

There weren't any spells coming back at us.  _ No, please may she just be knocked out _ . I pleaded to myself as I ran towards her. Harry was finally getting out of the swamp after he conjured himself a rope to pull himself out, looking a bit furious as to the intensity of this mock duel.

"What the hell is her problem, Hermione?! She's trying to do snake-face a favor by killing me now!" He roared, trudging out of the water. His rope turned into a snake and bit him on the arm, and I used Sectumsempra to behead the snake before Harry tried pulling it off of him.

Finally reaching him, I pulled him to the ground and whispered in his ear, "She can hear us, so shut up! She has stealth on her side. That snake wasn't poisonous, by the way." Turning around, I uprooted a tree from the swamp, set it on fire, and sent it flying to where the first tree had landed.

"I always thought she was either brilliant or mental. Now I know that she can be just as brutal." Harry said, trying to find a way to get around her and surprise her from behind.

"Harry, this is a reproduction of the grounds of Hogwarts, right?" I asked, noting how familiar it was before Luna started blowing it up.

"Yeah, guess so. You think she's... over in Hagrid's Hut? I guess it does give her a good vantage point, and she's been able to see us before we see her."

Using the Hominem Revelio spell again suggested that she was definitely in that direction. "I learned that Transfiguration is a lot more powerful in duels than you'd think. I'm going to use that Pumpkin Patch to our favor."

_ How the hell will I do that? _ I thought. I could make it like devil's snare, and have it choke her out until we could get to her and disarm her.

"I need a way to block out the sun, Harry." I asked, not sure how we could do that.

Harry started torching all of the trees in the swamp, and the mixture of smoke and the evaporating water formed rain clouds thick enough to make the sky overcast.

"Brilliant." We snuck over towards Hagrid's Hut, and I had a clear line of sight to the Pumpkin Patch. Focusing harder than I ever had before, I transfigured the vines into Devil's Snare, and they shot out to capture Luna and began to restrain and choke her. "Okay Harry, you disarm her, and I'll release her from the Snare."

We rushed her, confident that we had finally beaten her in this duel. She tried to send a few more spells at us, but the vines made her spells miss. Harry disarmed her, and I changed the Devil's Snare into regular ropes that bound her still.

"Good job, you two," she said brightly, though her neck and arms had bruises and welts, "if you two work as a team and avoid obvious pitfalls like being too easily seen or heard, you just might survive the Death Eaters."

"Luna, it felt like you were really trying to kill us. Exploding the giant rocks, felling a tree on me, and making me get through a swamp? How are we supposed to counter that? Who duels like that?" Harry was exasperated, but he got his point across.

"Miss, you studied the duel between Albus and You-Know-Who, haven't you?" I asked Luna.

She nodded. "That duel, if any of us were a part of it, would have killed us instantly. They were creative and innovative in their destruction and defense. I'd never seen someone conjure a giant shield to take a curse in the middle of the duel; it takes great concentration to be able to do that in the middle of a fight. Also, I put up wards in this room so that none of us could get seriously injured."

"You failed to mention that to us, Luna." Harry grumbled.

"You'd have gone easy on me then. Finite Incatatem!" Luna replied, changing the room back to the training room that it originally was. "I'm thinking that after a shower, we'll make a plan of attack over lunch for Godric's Hollow."

Harry nodded, heading off to his room and shower. Luna and I went back to our room, and I wasn't sure if she wanted to go first or not.

"You can go first, Hermione." A wave of relief went over me.

"Thank you, Miss. Or did you want me to join you?" I asked tentatively.

"Where is this coming from?" Luna asked.

"I... don't know Miss." We were in the bedroom together, and I was already ashamed for having brought it up in the first place. "Forget I said any of that."

" _ Hermione Jean Granger, you will explain yourself right now _ . Sit on the chair over there, and tell me what's on your mind." I had never seen Luna get this assertive before. I felt both ashamed and aroused by it. I sat, and she bound my arms and legs to the chair.

"You're not getting up until you tell me what's been going on with you. You've been attempting to talk about something, then you drop it. Why are you asking if I'm attracted to you? Why did you just now offer to shower with me?" Luna demanded. My eyes started watering up, but I didn't care.

" _ Because I feel like I'm taking you for granted! _ I should be doing something, anything, to please you. And I've never had a female Domme before, and I don't know how!" I turned my head away from her, ashamed.

"How did you please Viktor? Or Severus? Seeing as you were at Hogwarts, you didn't have sex with them. And I'm not about to demand sex from you." She stated, which made me unsure if that comforted me or not.

"Do you want to, Miss? I knew Viktor and Severus did, but the situation wouldn't allow for it. And I was worked up for so long because of those lust potions that were slipped to me, and I'm really confused around you. Am I attracted to you, or just because you're my Domme now? I don't want to lose what we have, but is it more than just this?"

Luna, after a long pause, gave me an answer. "I have been known to be attracted to both men and women." After all this, and she's still being evasively vague.

"Can't you just...  _ order me…  _ to make love to you? Take the decision out of my hands? Just... get this resolved so I know once and for all if I'm a lesbian or not?" I was pleading, and Luna untied my hands and handed me a tissue.

"I won't order you to do that,  **ever.** And I'm not your Domme, I'm just taking care of you for the time being. Once you're able and mentally stable enough to decide for yourself, we may discuss that. As for your sexual orientation, only you can figure that out." Her voice went from gentle to almost venomous. "I won't be anyone's pity shag case again. Go take your shower." Luna freed me from the chair entirely, and left the room.

I had no idea what kind of scars she had from her own past, but I was starting to understand that we were helping each other out by this arrangement. After my shower, I found a change of clothes for me and Luna wasn't there. I changed and went to the kitchen, running into Harry.

"You pissed her off, didn't you?" He asked, showing me a brief note she left in his room.

_ Harry, need your cloak for a bit. Will be back for dinner. -LL _

"I tried offering... ugh. How do you blokes deal with women?" I asked.

"Now you see my problems with Cho." He offered. "So what did she last say to you?"

Dobby had made us tea and sandwiches, which we ate graciously. "It was obvious with Cho. She liked you but missed Cedric and was thinking of you both at the same time and felt guilty... oh. Maybe it's just obvious unless you're the other person. She said she didn't want another pity shag."

"'Mione, whatever you said to her for her to think that you meant that... was  _ entirely  _ the wrong way to approach it." He replied, sipping his tea. "You don't know if you like women, or if it's just her. That's really a moot point. Just apologize to her, and do what any bloke would do if he thinks he's interested in a witch." I looked at him incredulously. "Ask her out on a date. Just see if there's a romantic chemistry with her, outside of your Domme/submissive dynamic."

I set my forehead onto the dining table, dejectedly. "It's that simple, isn't it?"

Harry and I finished the sandwiches and tried to lay out a plan of attack for Godric's Hollow. We really needed better intel and a layout of the area.

"Any idea how we can get a map of the area?" Harry asked. I shook my head, and decided to figure out how to apologize and ask Luna out.

"Harry, we're going to need a layout of the area first; when Luna gets back, I'll borrow the cloak and do a quick survey of the area." I took a deep breath. "Where should I take Luna out? And how?"

Without missing a beat, Harry tossed me a sack of what sounded like coins. "Ron had the idea of raiding my vault for gold before the war made it too difficult, or if the bank shut down. Take forty quid and go to the Odeon in Camden Town. Maybe she'll like the muggle cinema. And don't worry about the money, consider it... repayment for missing your birthday when you were St. Mungo's. And take the cloak, just in case."

I tried to convey my thanks, and already had butterflies in my stomach over the plan. Now I know why Viktor was so nervous asking me to the Yule Ball. A sound of a crack permeated the silence. Luna had apparated back into the house, her body shivering and her eyes widened in horror. 

"I did a recon trip of Godric's Hollow to clear my mind. Lots of Dementors... I think they're breeding." She dropped a scroll onto the table, and walked off to her room. The scroll was a map of Godric's Hollow, but it was spattered with blood.

"Miss! You're hurt!" I exclaimed, rushing to her aid. I summoned one of our first-aid kits, and stopped her from going to our room. "Let me see your wound, please."

"I can take care of myself." She tossed the cloak to Harry and tried to make her way around me.

"Luna. Stop." I asked, using her name for the first time in a long while. "I'm sorry. I'm not good at expressing my feelings, and I'm not sure what I feel. But I know I want to figure this out. And to take care of you as well. I'm not the only one that was hurt." I stuck my hand out with a patch infused with dittany.

She extended her arm, and winced as I wiped the wound clean. "It stings. I slipped and cut my arm on some sharp rocks, and the Dementors swarmed on me." I blew gently over the wound, and she smiled appreciatively. "Thank you."

My eyes looked up at hers, and I smiled back.  _ Now or never, Granger. _ "Let's go see a movie tonight. Muggle London."

Luna actually blushed a bit. My heart was racing. "I'd love to."

* * *

I apparated us to an alley near the back of the theatre, and we took off the cloak and stowed it as we walked around the building to buy tickets. She and I had changed into nicer muggle clothing for tonight; she stuck with that perfect shade of blue jumper and a pair of dark trousers that made her bum look shapely.  _ Okay, that I'm checking out her bum is saying something. _ I had gone with a brown jumper whose neckline was just a bit too low for this weather with a matching skirt and leggings. I was surprised that Luna had such normal looking clothing, but grateful we had coats and shoes that could trudge through the snow.

"It's a good thing Harry knew about that chocolate remedy. I thought I'd never feel warm or happy again." Luna admitted. "Also, don't call me 'Miss' tonight. Let's just see if this is a vanilla attraction."

I furrowed my eyebrows, questioningly. "Vanilla?" I asked, feeling her hand reach out for mine. I held her hand as she squeezed mine contentedly.

"It's slang for 'not the kinky BDSM stuff'. If you only like me because I've Dommed you, maybe you're just hetero-flexible. Only a few girls will strike your fancy, and only because us 'rare exceptions' hold a quality that you really like." I frowned slightly.

"Is that okay?" She nodded. We got around towards the front of the theater, and it was surprisingly crowded. Families were there with children, couples were on dates, and friends were going out in groups.

"It's almost like the muggles don't know. That must be nice." Luna said wistfully. I paused, and Luna turned to face me, concern on her face.

"That's the first time you've said anything remotely like the Luna I knew at Hogwarts. Oddly optimistic, in a way that only makes sense to you. Except that I understood you now." I replied sadly.

"The war changes people, Hermione. Even Neville finally grew a spine and became a powerful wizard. Being a prisoner in Malfoy Manor just because your father believes in a free press showed me how cruel the world can be. But I also learned that you have to accept the good moments when you can find them." She kissed my cheek, and her soft lips surprised me with their gentleness.

I looked at the posters for the movies that are being shown. "So... love story over a ill-fated ship crossing the atlantic?" We agreed on it, and I noticed the people trying to not stare at us as we were in the cue for our tickets.

"People are staring at us, Luna." I warned her.

"Some things never change. I got used to it a long time ago." Her calm courage was heartening. We bought the tickets and I asked if she wanted coke and popcorn.

"I've never had that fizzy muggle drink. Does it hurt?" She asked. I tried not to laugh too loud.

"No, the fizzyness doesn't hurt, unless you get it in your nose." We got the snacks and found our seats.

"Thanks for this, Hermione. So have you ever found other girls attractive? That Kate Winslet girl on the poster looks quite pretty."

I thought about it. "She's actually British, I used to watch her on the BBC. Muggle television show. I can see why people see her as attractive." I shrugged. She reached for some of the popcorn, and muttered something about the gritty texture of butter.

As the movie began, I let my mind wander about myself. I hadn't found girls attractive until Luna, and even then it was only when she had Dominated me.

"This entire movie is a giant flashback? Well, it's not a surprise what happened to the Titanic, now is it?" Luna whispered to me. I chuckled as I reached for some popcorn, and my fingers grazed over hers. All I really felt was a comfortable sensation with her.

As the movie got underway, I was trying to not identify with Rose. But it was as if I was expected somehow to wind up with Ron, since I've already been accepted by the Weasleys as another daughter or expected daughter-in-law.

And then she was at the edge of the ship, and it reminded me of when I had lost control of myself and had shut down. When I accepted being called Jane, and could only try to escape from the pain I had felt. Luna took my hand consolingly, and was the one who brought me back from the edge.  _ Of course, Rose's family doesn't like him and isn't 'proper' for her. _ I couldn't help but cheer her on for partying in third class.

I turned my head to look at Luna. I don't know if she's ever seen a muggle movie before, but she's not being like Arthur Weasley would have been. There was something about her face that perplexed me; she had soft features but I could see the strength behind them. Then her eyebrows raised and she bit her lip suggestively. 

_ Lost track of time, Granger.  _ On the screen, Rose was getting naked for Jack to draw her. So that's what she looks like. Huh. I tilted my head slightly, trying to appreciate the female form. Luna seemed to appreciate it just fine. As the movie progressed, Rose and Jack made love. It was pretty expected, considering she was naked and he was a healthy bloke. And then came the iceberg.

"Well, that wasn't a surprise." I whispered to Luna, who chuckled quietly.

The fiancée finds out about Jack and frames him for stealing the jewelry, getting him handcuffed to a sinking ship. He even bribed his way onto his own life boat, and would only take Rose with him.

"I get that he's a prat. Are muggles always this greedy and two-dimensional?" Luna asked me, and I shook my head.

Jack and Rose were together at the top of the sinking ship, and Jack offered Rose a plank of wood only big enough for one of them. A group of girls in front of us were crying, asking why did they have to make the ship sink. Luna and I couldn't help but roll our eyes at it. The ending was supposed to be sad and heart-wrenching, but we just couldn't help but think that they were being over the top.

As the movie ended, Luna and I left the theater, mocking Rose's lines. I took Luna's hand in mine, and hammed it up like Lockhart used to. "I'll never let go Jack! I'll never let go... Oh crap, you're dead." And I let go of her hand, brushing her off like Malfoy would a House Elf. We each laughed ourselves into each other's arms.

Luna put a daft look on her face. "Oh my god, how could they make the ship sink? That was like, totally depressing." I laughed again, realizing how close our faces were to each other. I had always found myself drawn towards dark eyes, but Luna's blue eyes had captivated me.  _ She held me in her gaze, and it was just in that look that I knew I was hers. _

"So, did you figure yourself out?" She asked, her hands gently squeezing on my hips.

I smiled sadly. "Not so much. I'm not finding other girls attractive, but I'm still confused about you. I'm sorry."

"Don't be. But for now," She pulled my hands off of me, "Close your eyes, and clasp your hands behind your back."

"Um, Luna. There's a crowd here." A twinge of fear and excitement hit me.

"I'm going to un-confuse you. Do as I say." Her face was serious, and I complied. Pinning my hands behind my back, I closed my eyes. My breathing hitched as the anticipation built up within me. Her hand cradled my jaw tenderly, and her lips pressed against mine.

Luna was kissing me, and my heart was thumping as my arms twitched to hold her as I kissed her back. My body was tightening with desire, and her hand moved from my jaw to my hair, threatening to tug my hair and throw me into submission.

"Should I continue, Hermione?" She whispered, her voice husky and making my thighs clench.

"Not here, Miss. Please take me back to our room." We scrambled off to find a hidden alcove to apparate back to where Harry was up and waiting for us.

As we found ourselves back in the safehouse, Luna had me pinned against the wall, running her lips down my throat and sinking her teeth into me. I wasn't sure if I was grunting or moaning; I only knew that I didn't want her to stop.

Harry walked over to us, oblivious as to what was going on. "How was the movie? I... oh. You know what, we'll work on the plan for Godric's Hollow tomorrow. I'm... going to bed. Yeah."

"Okay, Harry. Thank you!" I called out as Luna slipped off her coat and was roughly pulling mine off as well.

"Hermione, say red if you want me to stop. Understood?" She asked, her voice almost broken with panting.

I nodded, and Luna took me by the hand and we went back to our bedroom. I wasn't about to say red tonight.


	14. Chapter 14

Inside the room, Luna had me pinned onto the bed, her lips claiming mine possessively. It was wonderfully overwhelming, like an irresistible tide taking over me.

I began to slide my fingers through her hair, cupping her head and keeping her so close to me. I was rewarded with having my wrists bound to the headboard of the canopy bed, and her hand clamping onto my jaw firmly.

Her eyes locked onto mine; there was something overwhelmingly erotic in the way she gazed at me. I was helpless underneath her as I felt a hand trace my knee and graze its way up my inner thigh. My teeth chattered at the lightest touches as I knew that her hand was under the skirt and tracing outward to my hips, hiking the skirt up and hooked her fingers around the leggings.

"You okay with this?" She asked me, and I nodded frantically.

"Yes, Miss." I kicked my shoes off and shifted my weight as she pulled it off of me. She left the pants on for now, and ran her fingers up my bare legs. The sensation left me quivering as I grew more and more wet with desire. She unbuttoned the skirt and undid the zipper, lowering it to my ankles and I kicked them off in a bout of passion and frustration.

"We'll get to that, dear. For now just enjoy every sensation that you can." My wrists were released and I was tugging the jumper off before she even had to ask.

_ But she had expected this from me, it seems. _ She had me flipped over and each of my limbs tied to a separate poster as I was spread out on all fours. I couldn't keep myself on my wrists, so I had to drop to my elbows as a bare hand smacked and stung my ass.

I took a sharp gasp as parts tightened within myself. She hit me again, and I found myself asking for her to strike me harder. She grazed her fingernails up the length of my bare back, and I had arched into it. Soft lips pressed at the nape of my neck and I needed more from her.

Gentle fingernails tracing down my back, I was wriggling as her hands were massaging my bum in preparation for the next strike. But she struck my upper thigh, the sting of it traveling to my quim as I could only pant while wanting her hand to slap my warmest parts.

She brought out something cold and flat, rubbing it against my bum as I realized that it was a leather paddle. With each strike, the sensation was harder and made a deeper, thud-like sound. I lost count after a few blows she landed on me as the sensations made me feel lightheaded; as if I could be floating while I was tied down to the bed.

"Your bum is getting nice and red, dear. I'm quite proud of it." Luna complimented me sweetly as her bare hand ground against my clit in firm, tight circles.

"Miss... Miss... please. Gods..." I was becoming incoherent as her fingers pulled away, and all I could do was whimper until her hand struck my quim. Shocks went through my entire being, and my legs trembled as I tried to stay upright. Her lips were next to my ear and her warm breath was making me heady with anticipation.

"You are absolutely soaking, and I intend to lap..." her fingers shifted my pants to one side. "...you..." two fingers ran up my drenched labia as they parted just enough. "...up." She slid them inside me, and a high-pitched moan escaped as I was penetrated for the first time. I thought I felt myself tighten against her fingers as she slowly pumped them in and out of me.

Her hand turned inside me, curling her fingers as a jolt hit me. "Miss!" I hissed, unsure of what she was doing to me.

"This is known as the Gräfenberg Spot; when manipulated properly, it can make you have a much more intense orgasm than by clitoral stimulation alone. Do you really want me to go into a dissertation on your body and how I intend to bring you, or may I simply take you screaming in pleasure?"

"Fuck me, Miss." I shuddered gruffly. My bra was unhooked while my wrists and ankles were again released.

"On your back, Granger." I complied frantically, my eyes conveying the need that had overtook me. She slid the last of my clothing off of me, and charmed her own clothing off. Her pale skin and pert, firm breasts struck me as gorgeous as she crawled onto the bed on top of me. Her boldness and self-assuredness kept me pinned to the bed, even without any restraints.

I lifted my head up to kiss her again as she drove three fingers into me, sliding it in and out with a reckless nature. Her legs straddled mine as the length of her naked flesh pressed against me. It barely registered to me that I was making love to another woman and was enjoying it.

Her lips pried away from mine, and I protested until her lips locked onto my breast.  _ How does she know to do these things to me?! _

My hips buckled as she kept pumping her fingers into me, curling the tips inside me as I lost all control and clamped my hands upon her, screaming my release as she kept the penetrating rhythm going long after I thought I was done.

My body was hot yet cold, panting and sweaty as my Miss slowed down inside me.

"You've done so well, and were amazingly tight against my fingers dear. Now, open your mouth."

I did as I was told, and tasted my own juices on her fingers. It was exciting, savory, and I needed to know how she tasted as well. She slowly lowered her mouth in a trail of kisses until she ran her tongue up my folds, pushing inside me. I hadn't known a tongue could feel like that, or even be able to penetrate me.

"Miss, I believe I am..." I swallowed, hard. "already done. Don't you wish for me to repay.... you?"

"I do, now pay attention. It's not like I can't get you to come again for me. You will begin by licking and sucking on the clitoris with your lips and tongue. Once I seem suitably aroused, you will moisten your thumb with your mouth and use that in firm circular motions, like this..." she demonstrated it to me, sliding those three fingers into me again. As I looked down the length of my body, my eyes met hers. I had never seen such a look of hunger and desire before on her, and I realized that this was what she needed. She had needed me as much as I had been needing her. She needed to be wanted and desired; to let someone open themselves up and freely give themselves to her.

As I took in her instructions and felt myself climaxing again, her lips were on mine as I needed to release the built up passion and fire that she had been stoking within me. I shuddered my orgasm into her mouth as she greedily drank it in. I tasted myself on her, and it was such a heady flavor. Luna collapsed and lay naked next to me, stroking my hair as I caught my breath again. I felt loose and relaxed, limp in joints that had never existed until now.

As our eyes locked, she didn't have to tell me a word. I rolled over and began exploring her body with my mouth and hands, perhaps a bit too fast since I was wanting to go back up and kiss every square inch that I may have missed. But the scent of her sex hit me, and I was too curious to go back now.

The blond hair I had expected wasn't there at all, and I was appreciative so that I could see her labia and clitoral hood. I had spent so many nights imagining the male member that I never appreciated the simple beauty of a woman. Tentatively, I stuck my tongue out and ran it up her slick folds. Her flavor was different yet amazing; I was rewarded by her moaning and wanted to hear more. I was scared that I'd hurt her, so I slid one finger ever so slowly into her.

"Another finger, and be a bit faster." Her voice was shaky, because of me.

"Yes, Miss." I replied, and gathered my courage as I worked the second finger in and began to press my thumb where she had directed me.

"Harder." She directed, running her fingers into my hair and claiming my head possessively.

I felt her tightening on my fingers as I pumped into her harder, enjoying the sounds she was making as I knew the power that I was holding over her. Her hips bucked wantonly as she was becoming undone beneath me.

"Fuck me... fuck me fuckme f..." Luna shuddered as her orgasm overtook her and she was nothing but grunting and and panting. She was beautiful when she let herself go, and I was special enough to witness it. I crawled up to her and she held me like you would clutch driftwood when out in the sea.

"Good girl... so good to me.." she mumbled as she kept kissing me.

"You're welcome, Miss." I replied, proud of my achievement.

I was naked and locked in an embrace with my Miss. I had served her, loved her, and brought her to orgasm. Because she has gone twice as far for me, because she cherished me.

_ Thank you, Miss... so much. _

* * *

I had woken up to delicately strong arms around me, and I threaded my fingers through my Miss' hand and relaxed in a way that I hadn't done in the longest time. I must have lost time, or fallen back asleep, because my eyes opened again and I realized that I was alone in the bed now. The spot where Luna had been was still warm, and my hand ran over it lovingly. She had been sweet, strong, and undemanding as I had feared my first time with a guy might have turned out.

My heart and my mind went to Severus. He was busy being besieged by both sides as the Headmaster, attempting to protect the students as best he could while not having his loyalty questioned by the Carrows. He probably doesn't have a tart up in his chambers. I thought, and a wash of jealousy went through me. I knew that I had no claim on Severus now, not with the way that he had treated me. And I wasn't ready to face him just yet. But someday they would have to speak again, and I hoped that I would be ready then.

As I rose to start my morning ablutions, I smelled bacon cooking, and smiled at the impromptu household that we had created. Luna had been my steadying rock for so long, and last night felt like I had finally broken free of much of the lingering torment and doubt that I had accrued from my detainment. I knew that I loved Severus, but the connection that I've felt with Luna is something that I've never had before and wasn't about to give up. This was a choice in my life that I didn't want to have to make.

As I rinsed and spat in the sink, Luna had come back into the room. I approached her and lowered my eyes respectfully at her. "Good morning, Miss."

"Kneel for me." She asked tenderly. I complied, and I heard an approving moan come from her. The sorest parts of me tightened at knowing that this simple act brought her pleasure.

"I wanted to return your collar to you." As she said that, I realized that my neck had indeed been naked all last night. I had taken it off before leaving for the movie and had forgotten about it all last night.  _ Did I need to wear it again? _ I wondered.

"Thank you, Miss." I replied, seeing it in her hand. The silver disc attached bore Severus' initials. She brought it down towards my neck, and dutifully said, "lift up your hair please."

I started to comply, but it felt odd. I wanted the collar, but she shouldn't be putting it on me with his initials. "May I make a request, Miss?" I asked. She stilled, but nodded. "Would you mind taking the silver disc off? I may harbor feelings of attachment and resentment towards the man, but I do not belong to him."

Luna nodded, and took the disc off. "Do you belong to anyone right now, Hermione?" The way she had said that almost seemed like a challenge.

"No miss, but I think I would like to." I replied honestly, and Luna pulled the collar back and set it on the bed.

"Then we will talk about this over breakfast. I've already written up a plan and calculated the arithmantic projections for our outcomes. Harry's waiting for us."

I nodded, getting up. We'll talk about owning me over breakfast. In front of Harry.  _ Can he handle this? _ I wondered.

I sat at the table, peering over the map and saw Harry's notations on how we could enter Godric's Hollow without being detected. Luna served me a plate of egg in the basket, and whispered in my ear.

"I want my coffee with a dollop of milk and one sugar, dear."

I blushed at the term of affection. "Yes, Miss." As I prepared her coffee, I made a cup for myself as well. I glanced over to Luna, not sure if I was allowed coffee myself. She nodded sweetly, the faint smile on her lips all the permission I needed. Harry watched the exchange as I ceased the stirring charm I had on our mugs of coffee, and sat myself down to eat.

"Such a good girl, Hermione. Thank you." Luna replied, tapping her wand to the map and displayed an alternate plan to infiltrate Harry's birthplace.

I feeling of pride and achievement swelled within my chest, and looked to her. "It pleases me to serve you, Miss."

"Likewise, Hermione. Now, Harry and I each have put up plans on getting to Bathilda Bagshot's home. I'd like for you to point out the best parts of each plan and make a better one."

Harry interrupted my planning. "I wanted to ask... well, not about last night, I think that's been settled... but I think I get it. Hermione's always been a hard worker and wanting something to do and to get rewarded for it. Even in her relationships, she wanted someone she could trust and... well, needed her. It's not all about leashes and pain, but about the trust and closeness you two can have. But what about Snape?"

I was about to correct him, but he wasn't our Professor anymore.  _ I didn't know what he was to me, either. _ "I don't know; I can't trust him for what he did. But I trust him now not to hand us over to You-Know-Who. I even know that if the war were over tomorrow, he'd take me back and be the happiest man alive. But snake-face is still out there, so I'm just seeking enough for now. Making do."

I looked to Luna in horror. "I'm sorry, I don't love you like I love him. Is that okay?" I couldn't make heads or tails of where I stood with Severus except that I loved him and this can't work right now.

Luna's eyes held sad understanding. "It's fine, but you don't have to be owned by someone to be a good submissive. And I'm not jealous; not really. I'm seeking enough as well for now."

I nodded my thanks, understanding our arrangement.

"What about Ron?" I asked Harry, seeing how the two plans could be merged. Luna didn't know we had an Invisibility Cloak.

"He's a prat, and won't ever want to understand it." He replied, finishing his coffee.

As the three of us discussed that it would be better to apparate outside the city where snatchers wouldn't hear us arrive, Luna was surprised to hear that we had both an Invisibility Cloak and a Disillusionment Cloak.

"So you and Harry will be under separate cloaks, and I'll have myself disillusioned and make a perimeter sweep around the target building as you two wait for my signal in the graveyard." Luna advised, merging the two plans beginning steps together.

"I should do it with the cloak." Harry suggested, his Gryffindor bravado showing.

"No Harry, if it's windy, or you snag the cloak on something, our cover is blown. Luna's great at that spell, so don't worry about her." I replied, knowing that the truth was something Harry would never admit to.  _ Luna's more expendable than you are. _ We hammered out the rest of the details, and even had backup plans in case we were found out, faced by Dementors, or overrun by Snatchers.

As we finished the plan, we all agreed to wait until nightfall before we implement it. After Harry seemed to gung-ho all this time, having to agree to wait for a few more hours seemed like nothing.

"I'm glad you're here, Luna. I think if it were just me and 'Mione, we'd have barged in the middle of the town without a plan and set off who knows how many detection spells." Harry thanked her.

"And I'd still think I was Jane." I confessed, knowing that my counterpart was still there, willing to take over should I lose control.

Luna smiled, and kissed me gently on the lips. "I'd still be in St. Mungo's, or worse, back with the Malfoys. I'm on your side, no matter what. Now, we all need some rest before tonight, so I suggest we all go take a nap." She paused for a moment, considering. "Harry, come join us? I'll read to you about the Tale of the Three Brothers."

"Aren't you worried that I might try something with the two of you?" He asked, shocked.

"You, Harry? No, I want to be be sure I get some rest and not try anything with Hermione." She chuckled as we all lay above the covers with Luna in the middle.

I was fast asleep with my arm around her as she read to us about the brothers at the bridge.


	15. Chapter 15

The three of us apparated outside of Godric's Hollow, and Luna helped me set up some perimeter spells as she showed Harry how to mask the snow trail behind us.

"How do you know spells like this?" Harry asked.

"It was in a book, naturally." Luna replied, disillusioning herself before our eyes. I could see the barest transparent shape of a human, but once in the snow she'd blend into her surroundings.

"Okay, I'll make a quick study of the perimeter, see if there are any security caterwauls, check out Bagshot's house, and meet you in the cemetery. Don't forget to put a warming charm on so that snow doesn't stick to the outside of your cloaks. No use being invisible if you're a walking snowflake." Luna dove forward and gave me a quick kiss, and I was startled at it. "Be careful, hon."

"Yes, Miss." I replied, leading Harry a longer route towards his parents' grave.

"You weren't expecting that, were you?" Harry asked. I shook my head, then realized he couldn't see it.

"No, I wasn't. But it's okay." As we got within the outskirts of the town, Harry cast muffliato so we could whisper if needed. I was able to hear Christmas carols in the distance.  _ Was it Christmas already? _

"You know she loves you." Harry had the worst timing.

"Yeah. It's as obvious as why she's checking the perimeter alone and I'm with you." I replied bitterly. I wasn't angry with Harry, not really. I was pissed off at the war, at everything that has happened, and losing friendships that may never get resolved in case we don't make it. And it's Christmas, and I don't have my family.

"What? I just thought it would be easier for her to do that alone." Harry really was too naive at times.

"She's  _ more expendable  _ than you. If the house is a trap and she doesn't send me the signal, I'm to get you out of here and back to Snape's house before I'm allowed to come rescue her." I replied dryly, hoping this wouldn't be what would happen.

"But that's mental! She always was a bit of a nutter, but leave her to possibly die just to keep me safe?" Harry asked in surprise.

"It's what Dumbledore tasked you when you two went for that locket, remember?" He nodded. "Besides, she's Ravenclaw. Logic dictates to her that I save you first and then come back for her. She's not courageous to the point of it being a flaw like us, and would want me to come look for her... but not at the risk of losing The Chosen One."

As we entered the gates to the cemetery, we saw a pair of snatchers patrolling the street. "Close one, 'mione." Harry whispered as I took us to the gravesite.

"Um, Harry... we're here." The tombstone had an unusual rune on it, and the quote seemed a bit disturbing for its placement. I conjured a wreath and let him put it down for them.

_ The last enemy that shall be destroyed is Death. I Corinthians 15:26. _

"I never knew the bible to sound so much like... well, You-Know-Who." Harry said in a silent shock. I was still trying to figure out the rune when Harry pointed out an elderly woman shuffling out to see us.

"Is that Bathilda? Luna's not back yet from her sweep." I asked, concernedly.

"I think she wants me to follow her." Harry replied.

"She can't see us though." I replied, remembering that she probably saw the wreath.

As Harry began to follow her, I kept looking for Luna in the distance. It wasn't until a warm flash from the collar told me that the building was clear.

"Luna just sent me the signal, the house is clear of any traps." But where is she?

Harry took it as a good sign and followed Bathilda into the home where he was beckoned to go upstairs with him.

"Harry, I don't like this." I said, something clawing at the back of my skull.

"I think she's under Dumbledore's orders only to speak to me. Maybe she has the sword and has to give it to me." As Harry went upstairs, the door opened behind me and I spun towards the draft, only to see Luna's eyes widen in panic.

"We were to meet at the grave! Don't panic me like that!" She chided in a hoarse whisper. "Where's Harry?"

"He's upstairs, Bathilda wanted to see him alone." I looked around, and saw the home in a state of disrepair. Something hit my senses and I started to take a deeper whiff.

"The food's gone spoiled. My father didn't take my mother's death well; I was allowed to floo home and help him deal with stuff during my first year when she passed away. He couldn't get himself to clean up the house and lose what was left of her."

I wanted to gag on the scent. "That's food? Bad food?" I asked.

"Partly, but also the smell of a corpse that needed to be taken out of the house. You won't forget that smell."

A crashing sound from upstairs alerted us that something was wrong, and we bolted up there as a loud crack alerted us of an apparition. Luna slashed her wand through the air and determined that only one person had shown up upstairs.

"Tom Riddle. Merope Gaunt." I said as a quick prayer, putting up the defensive spells in order to trap whatever snatcher showed up.

As Luna and I got upstairs, Harry had been knocked aside as the corpse of Bathilda had rotted apart and a giant snake had slithered out of the human shell.

**_Nagini._ **

A silver sword flashed through the air, as fast as the pair of fangs that lunged towards Severus Snape. As the metal hit flesh, he pulled back and used himself to guard Potter, the sword burning in his hands and making him drop it.

"Harry, take the sword. It won't let me use it!" Severus shouted, flicking hex after hex towards the Dark Lord's familiar. Luna had joined in the fray, but spells were bouncing off of its hide.

I focused my magic and released the blue fire from my wand, hitting the snake directly. Harry took the sword and beheaded the snake as it writhed in pain. 

"The Dark Lord has tasked me to hide this sword in the LeStrange vault in Gringotts. I handed over a fake, set to destroy itself when it comes near another Horcrux there. Like this sword, it was impregnanted with Basilisk Venom so it will kill any horcruxes there.

"Good luck finding the rest of them, Harry." He turned to disapparate, but found himself stuck behind the enchantments.

"We have to go, now. The Dark Lord will have felt that." Severus' urgency faltered as he saw me at the doorway. Luna had her arm around me as Severus' eyes pierced mine.

Harry scrambled over to us, clasping our hands together.

"Voldemort." He said loudly, breaking all of the protection spells so Snape could leave. "Let's get back to the house."

As Luna began to disapparate us, I called out to him. "Severus!" I couldn't say any more.

As the sensation of a jerk solidified behind my navel, I saw the look of hurt in his eyes. "I love you, too." He shouted as we were whisked away.

Though I found my feet in Snape's home with Luna and Harry beside me, I couldn't help but think that I left something important behind.

* * *

Back in Snape's house, I frantically checked myself and Harry for wounds.

"How was he? Did he get out safely? Is he okay?" I asked once I was sure Harry wasn't terribly harmed.

"He looked... tired. And sad. He has to keep his appearance up around the Death Eaters teaching in the castle." Luna replied, taking out her notebook.

"Hermione, I'm sorry. It was a trap... Nagini inside of that witches' body..." Harry said in shock.

"She's been dead for awhile. It's not your fault. Now we have a sword and we're down a horcrux." I replied, my mind making a connection I hadn't realized before. "You used this sword to kill the Basilisk, and Dumbledore used the sword on the ring. It's been infused with Basilisk venom!"

"That would be why it can destroy a Horcrux... Harry, where's the locket?" Luna asked.

Harry pulled the locket out of his pocket and handed me the sword. "I used to wear this all the time, until I realized You-Know-Who's magic was making Ron and I row all the time. 'Mione, I killed the Diary. Makes sense that you should take this one out."

Holding the sword in a double-handed grip, I resolved myself to swing and destroy the Dark Item that was holding a part of Voldemort's soul on this side of existence. As Harry laid it down on the dining table, he whispered something in parceltongue and it opened. A pair of red eyes faced me, and I shrank as the face around it melded into me.

_ "Oh look, you think you're ready to stand up for yourself? All the facts and books in the world cannot help you know, Hermione. You never should have been sorted in Gryffindor, you don't have the strength to even be yourself. _

_ "Let Jane take over. Crawl back inside to the recesses of your mind, curl up with a book. Give up like you always will." The voice from the locket was mockingly similar to mine, and I could feel myself shutting down again as the weight of the sword was wearing my arms down. _

_ "That's right, put down the sword. Escape this right now, run away like the little scared girl that we both know you are. It's why Ronald couldn't stand to be around you. You were weak and wanted to belong to someone stronger, someone to make every decision for you. It's why Snape hasn't come back for you; he's disgusted by the fact you have to have 'Jane' take over. Your brain is addled to the point where you've fractured yourself, split yourself into two. You're no better than You-Know-Who." _

"Hermione! Destroy it!" Harry urged, but I wasn't sure I could.

I raised the sword in my hands, and the face morphed into Severus'. 

_ "I could never desire damaged goods such as you, 'Jane'. I'd prefer a more pliant, coherent submissive who can think for herself and not need me to wipe her arse on a daily basis. I recall how you weren't even trusted nor allowed to bathe without assistance." _

I faltered, lowering the sword and I felt hot tears seep from my eyes.  _ I'm strong enough, Hermione! Let me take over! _

"No, Jane. I'm Hermione... Hermione!" I cried, clenching my jaw tight as I sniffled. The words still hurt, especially since I saw them come from Snape's lips.

A tug tightened around my neck, and my vision was filled with a pair of blue eyes.  _ Luna's eyes. _

"Hermione, you need to take that sword and destroy that Horcrux. You have to do this. Do you understand me?" Luna's voice conveyed the absolute certainty that I needed to have in my life. I nodded, and tightened my grip on the sword.

"Yes, Miss." I replied.  _ I knew that I had to do this now. _ Her lips touched mine, and I took a sharp inhale as she moved away and I planted the blade into the metal. The expectant clang was more of a meaty thud, and the locket bled a grisly gray. The red eyes faded and the fear within me dissipated; the part of me that was Jane had slunk away to hide deep within me.

"Thank you." I said to the pair of them.

Harry embraced me in his arms, glad to be rid of the Damned locket. "I'm glad to have you back. There's just one more left, and I think You-Know-Who knows that Nagini is dead." Harry let go of me, and his eyes distanced as if in a trance.

"He's worried for his Horcruxes now. There's a cup in Gringott's, locket in a cave, diary in Malfoy's care, ring under the rubble that was the Gaunt House, and a crown-thingy in Hogwarts." Harry spoke painfully.

"That has to be Roweena Ravenclaw's lost Diadem!" Luna said. "We have to get there and find it!"

Harry nodded quickly. "But we'll need a plan. We can go to Aberforth Dumbledore at The Hog's Head."

I looked at them both, panicking at how fast we were nearing the final battle.  _ Only one Horcrux left.  _

Then we kill Voldemort.


	16. Chapter 16

"I really think we should have a plan first." Luna commented, restocking our first aid kits. Her lips were trying to hide a frown, but I wasn't sure I wanted to ask.

"Yeah, see...  _ I'm Harry Potter. _ Not only do things never go according to plan, but I've come to learn that 'winging it' seems to work for me. Besides, Hermione usually can think up of one on the fly." Harry replied, conjuring a sheath for the sword.

I nodded in agreement, and pulled out my disillusionment cloak. The charm seemed to be fading somewhat, and Luna helpfully strengthened it. I nodded a silent thanks, and Harry noticed the strange energy between us.

"Luna, what's wrong?" Harry asked, pulling his Invisibility Cloak on but leaving the hood down, making himself look like a floating head.

"It's nothing; I think I can apparate the three of us directly inside the pub, but the sound will attract some attention." Luna replied, muttering something under her breath about silencing charms.

Harry saw that I wasn't going to pick at the problem, and realized that she and I both knew something and weren't about to mention it. "Hermione, this is when you usually speak up and tell me what I'm missing." He grasped my wrist gently in order to pause my pointless shuffling through my knapsack.

"The Horcrux made me face my biggest fears; losing my sense of self and losing the man I love. It was worse than a boggart." My voice wavered, and a quick glance to Luna showed me a pair of red eyes.

"Harry, please let it go. We have a mission ahead of us." Luna wiped at her eyes with the back of her left hand, and cast a glamour charm on herself. It looked like she hadn't been about to cry anymore.

"You're upset because the locket didn't take your form." Harry stated to Luna, soft with understanding.

"Look, I get it. It's always going to be  **him** . Ronald and I can start ourselves a support group once the war is over." Luna said bitterly, thrusting her hand out to me. "Do you want to apparate the three of us there or should I?"

"That's not it at all, Miss... I just... I don't know." I replied, feeling like shite. "You were here and supporting me all this time and he wasn't. If I waited any longer, maybe it would have..."

"Shutup and apparate us. I'm no good to do that right now." Luna snapped uncharacteristically.

I took her hand in one of mine, and Harry's in the other, and turned on the spot for The Hog's Head. The apparition wasn't as loud as we thought it would be. But the alarms that went off told us that Snatchers were in the area. Aberforth had his wand pointed wildly in his pub, then lowered his wand when he didn't see anyone. A sharp knock on his door made him jump slightly, and I heard his stage-whisper.

"Only idiot dumb enough to do that must be Harry Potter. Stay under your cloak." As he went to the door, he barely opened it a crack.

"What do 'ya want?" He sneered.

"Apparating after curfew's against the rules. You know that. We want to take a look-see and see if you're harboring any Undesirables." It was Yaxley, the Death Eater.

"I'll do as I please in me own pub! Besides, I just got back from Knockturn Alley knocking shop. It's just me in here." Aberforth opened his door further, and Yaxley peered over the barkeep's shoulder.

"I didn't know you could bugger goats there." He sneered.

"It was a witch! You want me to stop you guys from using this place to trade poisons and the like?" Aberforth's threat sounded genuine enough. Yaxley just laughed it off.

"I'm not going to get between the private affairs of the remaining Dumbledore and the whore goat he rented." Yaxley slammed the door shut, and Aberforth looked visibly relieved.

"I took the fall for Ariana's one accidental spell while Albus was off being famous and I get saddled with the reputation for bestiality. Now, Potter, why in blazes are you here?"

Harry pulled back his hood. "You used to be a part of the Order. I need to get into Hogwarts."

"Never took you for an idiot, boy. The Order is gone. The war is over. Haven't you seen the papers? Even the Quibbler is printing the same rubbish as the Daily Prophet is now."

Luna's gasp startled Aberforth. "Oh, of course, you wouldn't be here alone. That must be Granger."

I lowered my hood. "I'm over here. Now, can you get us in or not?" Luna canceled her disillusionment charm.

"They got to father. Must have told them I was still a prisoner in Malfoy Manor." Luna fidgeted, probably wondering hot to get word to him.

"What do you have to do in Hogwarts? Go get yourself killed by Snape?" Aberforth snapped.

"Yeah, something like that. Except I plan on killing Voldemort!" Harry yelled back.

"NO!" we all yelled in unison.

"Tom Riddle and Merope Gaunt!" I cried out, knowing that it wouldn't hold up too long once the Death Eaters started apparating to Hogsmeade.

Aberforth grabbed Harry and shoved him over to the painting of Arianna. "On your head be it!" The portrait swung open and the three of us walked down the corridor that took us to the Room of Requirement.

* * *

As we took the corridor, we realized we could hear voices laughing that we hadn't heard in ages.

"...who wouldn't want a nice little holiday after all the hard work he's been putting in? Point is, people, don't get lulled into a false sense of security, thinking he's out of the country. Maybe he is, maybe he isn't, but the fact remains that he can move faster than Severus Snape confronted with shampoo when he wants to." Fred's voice was mixed with a bit of static, and Harry had to whisper 'it's a wireless program' to me.

"Oi! Who's there?" Neville had his wand out and lit, seeming ready to duel whomever was approaching. He looked like he had been roughed up on a regular basis, but seemed to have been made a stronger wizard for it.

"It's Harry, Hermione, and Luna!" I called out.

"Prove it!" He replied.

"I put a full body-bind curse on you in our first year for being a cowardly prat!" I said, smiling at the memory.

"Um... okay." He replied, "Come on in!"

As the three of us walked into the large room, I could tell it was the Room of Requirement. It was an impromptu version of the Gryffindor Common room, but it was covered in the colors of Gryffindor, Hufflepuff, and Ravenclaw, and had bunk beds scattered throughout the room.

Another pair of bunk beds materialized, and immediately I could see the top bunk was designed for Harry while the bottom bunk was a mix of silver, green, and blue.

"That's the first time we've had Slytherin colors here..." Padma replied, "But this room knows what we need."

Cho Chang approached cautiously, unsure how to react around Harry. "How come it only made two beds for the three of you?"

Ginny made it through the crowd and was wrapping herself around Harry like there was no tomorrow. It was a horribly personal moment, and I fought the urge to hold Luna's hand. Luna walked over and sat on the bottom bunk, running her fingers over the blue and emerald comforter. 

"It knows we've been sharing a bed, and that she still wants to."

Everyone looked at Luna like she wasn't all there, but shrugged it off as they always did in the past.

"...this just in from Dumbledore's Army, safely tucked in under the rather large nose of Headmaster and Murderer Severus Snape... HARRY POTTER IS THERE! Sounds like we're gearing up to finally be rid of ol' Snakeface!" Fred said over the wireless.

"How did he know?" I asked frantically. Neville sheepishly raised his hand, holding the contact galleon that I had made years ago.

"You're here to rally the troops and fight, right?" Neville asked.

"I'm here for... um... Dumbledore's orders. Albus Dumbledore's orders. I need to get... something."

"There's a statue of Roweena Ravenclaw in her common room." Luna supplied, opening up her First-Aid kit and passing out the contents.

"I can take you there!" Cho offered, a bit too cheerfully. Ginny glared at her furiously.

"That's okay, Cho. Pretty sure it's a trap. Besides, that's only a statue I need to find wherever it got..." Harry's voice trailed off to the barest whisper. "...stashed."

"I've gotta say, this is amazing news, Rapier! Not only did the Lestrange vault in Gringott's suffer the wrath of Godric Gryffindor when Rudolphus tried to stash his sword away, but Harry's finally surfaced and we're all going to amass there for the battle of the ages! If you've ever wanted to fight You-No-Poo..." George said excitedly.

"...honestly, that joke is old now..." Fred countered.

"...and if you want to support Harry, get yourself over to Hogwarts! Our contacts say that you can apparate in through either The Hog's Head or the Shrieking Shack. We're signing off now, and telling you all to grab your wands..." George's enthusiasm only grew at this point.

"...grab your courage..."

"...and maybe grab yourself if you have no wand or courage..."

"...and join in the fight! For Harry Potter!" Both twins finished together.

"You Gryffindor lot are barking mad, did you know that?" Luna asked, smiling sweetly. I sat next to her on the bed, blushing.

"It's our best quality." I replied, noticing a doorway being created nearby. Harry pulled his cloak back on, whipped out his wand, and opened the door slightly.

"I seriously love this room!" Harry said, flipping back the hood. "Hey, Hermione, Luna... I think it's in here!" Harry pulled out the sword of Gryffindor from his scabbard, and we heard the rest of the room gasp in surprise.

"You really are the Chosen One." Neville said.

Luna and I took out our wands and began to follow Harry.

"Hey, need some help?" Neville asked.

"Nope, but McGonagall will, seeing as you just told everybody to come here to fight You-Know-Who. We're going to need to have our forces directed and the castle made ready for battle." I replied, closing the door behind us.

The room was filled with piles of junk; this seemed to be a place where even the House-Elves refused to clean. Or they didn't know it existed.

"Accio Diadem!" Harry cried out, and wasn't surprised when nothing happened.

"Evil thing with its own consciousness for self-preservation won't be that easy." I said sadly.

"Wait a minute... it could look like a crown, right? It was near where I stashed my book!" Harry asked. Luna nodded.

"Accio Snape's Potions Textbook!" He called out, hearing a thunderous crash. "IMPEDIMENTA!" The book was frozen in mid-air, above the rest of the piles of junk.

"Brilliant, Harry!" I said as we raced over to the disturbed pile.

"There's the Diadem, still on top of the ugly mannequin head." Harry was almost in disbelief. He held the sword out to Luna. "Want a stab at it?" He quipped.

"The sword won't let me, remember Snape?" She replied.

"If you can't wield the sword, wield the tiara from hell." I suggested. "We can hold the sword still for you."

Luna looked at the Diadem apprehensively. Taking a deep breath, she picked it up in her fist and brought it towards the blade. The diadem hissed and brought forth a dark plume of smoke, taking the form of a beautiful wispy woman. Luna's voice cracked a single syllable, 'Mom'.

_ "Oh look, the sidekick thinks she's people. I always knew you'd turn out wrong; I only hoped that you would be a bit odd like your father. Instead you're a complete freak, taking other witches as lovers! MUDBLOODS, NO LESS!" _

"You're not my mother, you're just a fragment of a soul of a sick, sad little boy." Luna said, pushing the diadem closer to the sword.

Harry seemed to be unable to bring the sword any closer to the Diadem, either. In fact, he was struggling to keep the sword upright. It didn't seem fair that this Horcrux could learn from the demise of the locket.

"Hermione, help her!" Harry said with a strained voice. The apparition of her mother turned into beautiful yet wicked version of myself. It wasn't like before; it seemed to have more fury than I had recalled.

_ "Looney... you should put on the Diadem, and claim the wisdom promised to Ravenclaw House. You would finally be witty and clever enough for people to like talking to you. You would finally know what you need to do to claim my love, rather than fail when compared to Severus, the murderous Death Eater." The apparition of me flashed a cruel, seductive smile as she slipped her robes off, exposing my nude form. Luna apparently had a very forgiving perception of my body, and Harry looked away, awkwardly. _

_ "I'll give you a hint, Looney. You're too safe, too nice, too good for her. She needs the bit of fear to fuel her passion, she wants a man that can overpower her and take her by force. You have no Darkness within you. Put on the Diadem, and I'll show you how to defeat Snape, defeat Harry, and to claim her as your prize!" _

Luna screamed in a soul-crushing agony, shoving the circlet into the path of the sword. It bled a thick, black ichor. The sneer on her face as she looked at the Diadem's blood running down her arms shocked me, but it also pulled at me in a strange way.  _ Was the Diadem telling the truth on some level? _

Turning her wand in a slow circle, Luna repaired the dent in the Diadem and put it on her head. " **_How do you like my darkness now?_ ** " She seemed to be radiating a sense of strength and power that was eerily intimidating.

"Voldemort knows we're killing his Horcruxes, Harry. The taboo is broken, and Hogwarts' ancient protective spells are up now. And you were right about your theory that your cloak was one of the Deathly Hallows, and the stone is inside that snitch. It's like I'm making connections between pieces of knowledge that nobody else did. I can't wait for Tom Riddle to see me wearing this." Luna said in a sweetly horrifying way. The leaking darkness streaked through her hair, and it left her looking stunning while scarily powerful.

The three of us went back to the Room of Requirement's main room and was surprised to see the Weasley family there along with the rest of The Order. Ron was smart enough to look ashamed, while the twins had no concept of the word.

"Harry, off saving the Wizarding World with a pair of beautiful women..." Fred stated.

"...and take a gander at Luna! I'll let her be my Mistress of the Dark Arts anytime!" George added.

Luna smiled, taking my hand in hers. I wasn't sure if I was blushing or not since I was taken by surprise as Ron tackled me in a hug.

"Oh, 'Mione, I missed you so much! I was a bloody idiot, getting jealous and thinking that you needed to belong to someone like a pet." Ron's hug was crushing and had pulled my hand out of Luna's.

"Ron, you're squeezing me a bit tight." I managed, forcing another breath in. I also wanted him to shut up about that while others were around us.

"...and honestly, I don't care that you and Luna shared a bed at our safe-house. It's not like you two were having sex or anything..." Ron continued obliviously. Luna was starting to glare while Harry did the 'cut it out' gesture to him.

"Ronald, shutup. Your stupid is showing." Ginny said dryly.

Ron finally let go of me, and I adjusted my clothing and my collar. He finally noticed it.

"You're still wearing that thing. You still hung up on him? Blimey, I thought you had more respect for yourself than that!" Ron's face was between confusion and revulsion. The look on his face struck me harder than I thought it would, and felt ashamed as the rest of the Weasleys' eyes were on me. Luna took my hand and pulled me back towards her. Ron pushed her away, breaking the contact.

"Not now, Luna. I've gotta understand why my best friend is into this freak shite." Ron didn't notice that Luna was muffling a low growl.

"Ron, back off." Harry warned. "We've got Voldemort coming, remember?"

"IN A MINUTE!" Ron bellowed. "Look, 'Mione, just take it off, okay? We'll get you sorted out at St. Mungo's after this battle." As Ron reached for my collar, his words hit me.

I didn't want to go back there.  _ Ever _ . My vision of Ron was blocked by Luna, who had her wand out and hit him with a flurry of stinging hexes that made him back away.

"How dare you even mention that place to her! Do you remember what we went through?" Luna's anger had everyone surprised, and the barest tremble in her hand betrayed the rage she was holding back.

"Are you completely mental, Luna? She's my friend and needs help, not to feel like someone owns her!" Ron tried to reach around Luna to grab me, but found both our wands pointed directly into his chest.

"Don't you  **_EVER_ ** touch my Hermione again." At this point, the twins were pulling him away.

"Ronniekins, I think you should come with us now." Fred said, taking one of his elbows.

"Yeah, I've only got one ear now but I was listening better than you were." George added, pulling Ron by his other elbow.

"Why is Luna being like that?" Ron asked, confused.

"It appears that our Miss Granger plays  _ both sides  _ of the Quidditch pitch."

"Hermione is a fan of both the Cannons  _ and  _ the Harpies."

"Good one George!"

"What? No, you got it wrong! Hermione had fancied Snape, and called him 'Sir' while wearing that dog collar rubbish!"

"How is he our brother, Fred?"

"I have no idea, George. Did you even bother to look at the initials on that collar, you bloody prat?"

Ron tried looking back towards me, and realized that Luna was holding me as Harry and Ginny stood between us.

"Not that it was ever any of your business, and you didn't have to make a scene, but it's my initials on her collar; Luna Lovegood. Now can we please get on with killing Voldemort?"


	17. Chapter 17

"Harry, we need to address the school, maybe get everyone to gather in the Great Hall? Figure out a way to evacuate the younger kids from here?" I asked, wondering how we could get so many out so quickly.

Neville grabbed a microphone attached to a Wizarding Wireless and plugged it into the wall in a surprisingly muggle fashion. "Hey, Dumbledore's Army had to recruit somehow."

"That's bloody brilliant! Everyone in the castle will hear this?" Harry asked, and Neville nodded proudly.

"Even people outside the castle and on the grounds still. Apparently we were heard out in the Forbidden Forest as well."

Harry took the microphone and held it oddly under his jaw. "Everyone... This is Harry. Harry Potter. Voldemort's coming to fight here and I'm under Albus Dumbledore's orders to make this our last stand. Everyone who isn't of age needs to be evacuated, and..."

Harry looked around the room as the bunk beds vanished and a series of tables with random items on top of them materialized. "... the Prefects will escort them to the Seventh Floor where portkeys are awaiting them inside the Room of Requirement. And if you don't want to fight, you can leave just as well. But if you are taking the side of the Death Eaters, you had best leave now."

"So you want all of Slytherin out of the castle, do ya?" Fred joked, but his face went solemn as the truth hit him. The Sorting Hat had always wanted the four houses to unite, but it seemed like it never would come to be.

Minerva McGonagall was the first to come inside the Room of Requirement, harried and flustered as ever. "Potter! What is the meaning of this!"

"McGonagall! Snape's on our side! He killed Albus on Albus' orders after Albus forced me to poison him in order to destroy... well, to take out certain artifacts that made You-Know-Who immortal. There's just one left and we can kill him once and for all." Harry said, forgetting the microphone was still broadcasting.

I took my wand and terminated the charm, putting the microphone back down.

"Snape's loyal even after killing Albus?! Why would he order his own death?" She asked.

"His cursed finger, remember? Well, it was his whole hand. Then it went up to his wrist, then past his elbow... he was months away from it taking his heart and slowly killing him." I replied sadly. "It also ensured his position here to protect the school and to keep students from being punished by the Carrows."

Ginny spoke up. "I wondered why Snape made me patrol the forest with Hagrid for trying to steal Gryffindor's Sword. We just stayed in his cabin and held a 'Support Harry Potter' party instead."

Minerva's lips curled in a bit of a snicker. "He had us all fooled. Well, Flitwick and Sprout are putting up the defenses, so whatever you have to do, get to it."

Prefects and sleepy students were starting to file into the Room, where they saw the portkeys individually labeled for the students to take them home or someplace safe.

Minerva took a double take at Luna. "Is that what I think it is, Miss Lovegood?"

"It's definitely not a horn of a crumpled-horned snorkak." She jested. "By the way, where is Severus?"

Minerva thought, then gasped in horror. "Patrolling Ravenclaw Tower with the Carrows... if they heard Harry's broadcast, he's in trouble."

Luna and I exchanged a glance, and darted off to rescue him. He might be having to fend for himself against the two siblings, and I'd never forgive myself if I couldn't save him from this.

* * *

I followed Luna as she took us up to the Ravenclaw Tower, and I couldn't help but notice the strength and sheer power she had as she faced the portrait.

"To enter this tower, you must answer my question..." the portrait of Roweena Ravenclaw said distractedly, trying to find out what was happening inside her common room. As she faced myself and Luna, her eyes widened in shock and fear.

**"WHERE DID YOU FIND THAT?! WHO CORRUPTED MY DIADEM!"**

Luna's wand was giving off blue and black sparks as she faced her House Founder. Pale blond hair struck stark against the jet black streaks that framed her face, revealing the darkness that was within herself. I couldn't help feeling drawn to her like this;  _ am I drawn to the power or the dominance? _

"It was in the Room of Requirement, where Voldemort hid it after turning it into a Horcrux in his twisted desire to become immortal. I destroyed the Horcrux construct with Basilisk Venom in the sword of Godric Gryffindor. His Dark Magic has no sway here."

Voices from inside the common room were loud enough to be heard outside. "Snape, you bloody traitor! The Dark Lord will do worse than kill you for this!"

The portrait of Ravenclaw did not look pleased. "It may not have his taint on it anymore, but there is still Dark Magic within. Enter if you must; but I pray that you do the right thing."

The portrait swung open as Luna muttered about "not afraid to get my hands dirty", and began a series of transfigurations that turned the entryway to the Common Room into a swamp.

"Luna, what are you doing? We have to get over there still!" I said in a hoarse whisper, wondering what her strategy was.

"Swamps have crocodiles, don't they?" She asked coldly as one jumped out of the water and snagged Amycus, biting his leg. The sound of the femur breaking was only surpassed by his screams of agony.

Taking her moment to round the corner, she found Alecto's duel with Severus momentarily paused at the absurdity of the moment. Before I could raise my wand, a soft voice cut through the distance.

" _ Imperio _ . You sadistic bitch."

Severus raised his eyebrow at this, and conjured a bridge as he walked over the swamp to us. He looked thin and wan; several slicing hexes had been mostly deflected but had still taken parts of his robes with them.  _ Bloody skin let me know that he was wounded as well. _

"Are you two okay?" He asked neutrally, his eyes giving me a cursory look and remained on Luna. He seemed nervous around her.

"We're fine." I dismissed, torn between rushing to hug him and to stand firm.

Alecto was standing at the edge of the swamp, her own wand pointed threateningly under her own jaw.

"Amycus..." Alecto's voice grated out against her own will, "...You will stand down and drop your wand."

Groaning in pain and halfway submerged in the murky swamp, Amycus was frozen in fear as his sister was being held as a hostage.

" **SNAPE!** LET HER GO!" He howled in fear.

"It is not I that you must bargain with; Miss Lovegood has your sister under her control."

"Looney?" He turned to look at her. His disbelief was quickly shattered as he saw the look of resolve on her face. "How did you ever get out of Malfoy's dungeon?"

I was glad to see Luna had the situation under control, but was worried over what was happening. "Miss, are you okay?"

"I remember  **_EVERYTHING_ ** , Amycus! How you and your freak sister sent me to St. Mungo's and I went from torture victim to a sex-slave. 'Looney Lovegood, the Pureblood whore.' That’s right; I remember  **_everything._ ** The Healers there couldn't cast an  _ Obliviate  _ to save themselves, and I'll be going back to deal with Scotty  _ myself _ . But first, I think I owe you a bit of pain. Should I have your dear sister torture you or herself?"

Amycus whimpered at his decision as the pain of his broken leg continued.

"Miss Lovegood, please... you're better than this!" I implored, not wanting to see her like this.

"Luna, better to just kill them both off and be done with them." Severus' voice was doing everything it could to calm her, but she seemed beside herself with rage and a desire for vengeance.

"Alecto, cast Sectumsempra on your brother." Luna said sweetly to the imperioused witch. Without hesitation the red spell was cast and the brother began to bleed out into the swamp. "Very good, now..." Luna vanished a nearby window at the tower, "...go fly back to your Master."

Tears ran down Alecto's face as she watched her brother slowly fall beneath the surface, tinting the swamp water red. She had no choice but to run head-first out of the window from Ravenclaw Tower, silently as she was unable to stop herself.

As the witch disappeared, Luna summoned her wand and pocketed it as a grim trophy. "Glad to see you're save, Severus. We've destroyed the locket, cup, and diadem horcruxes. All that's left is Voldemort."

I turned to face Luna. "How could you do that, Miss? You didn't need to..." I trailed off as her lips grazed my forehead.

"Snape is safe now; that's all that matters. You have a decision to make, my dear." She put her wand to her throat, magnifying her voice. "Ravenclaw House, it is time to evacuate the school. Please make your way to the Room of Requirement." Her next wave of her wand made the swamp, as well as Amycus, disappear. She lead the nervous-looking children out of the common room, leaving myself and Severus there.

"Hermione. I..." Severus began, but I held my hand up to stop him.

"Don't apologize. I know. And right now, I don't care. We have a war to fight."

"You've become much closer to Luna than I had been lead to believe." His eyes looked hurt in a way that I never expected.

"She rescued me from the  _ hell  _ you dropped me in, Sev." I was resolved to stay mad at him, to keep my focus on the battle ahead. To remember that Luna killed two Death Eaters in cold blood just because they threatened the man that I had loved.

"I did it to keep you safe. As soon as I figured out what had been going on, I rescued you from there!" The pain in Severus' face couldn't be ignored.  _ So much for my resolve. _ I thought, pulling out my first-aid kit and tending to a bloody gash in his arm. He winced as the dittany-infused swab cleaned his wound, and I couldn't help but smirk at that.

"Miss has taught me something that I needed to learn; something that you could have never taught me because I wouldn't have listened.  _ War changes people _ . She loves me and knows that she's expendable when compared to Harry and his role in the war. I care for her deeply and sadly have to agree with her assessment. Before this war I'd have never considered any of my friends 'expendable' in any way. If our situation were reversed, I'd have done the same to you because I could never consider you that way."

"Hermione, I..." Severus was left speechless, and for once I was glad for it.

"I love you, you berk." I put my arms around him and squeezed, not caring if it hurt him a little.

"And what about Luna?" He asked gently into my ear. I stilled, sighing.

"It's complicated. I don't think I can choose between the two of you. The Byronic Hero and the antiheroine... you two are so similar yet so different at the same time."

He stepped away from me, leaving the tower. "Then don't. We have a war to finish, and a hero to sacrifice."

I followed him, his words striking fear in me. "Severus, don't!" I don't want to lose you! Not now!

As he left through the portrait hole, I grabbed hold of his elbow and turned him to face me. "Hermione!" Chastised, I let him go.

"Don't go off thinking you have to die, Severus."

"I have no such intention. I was speaking of Harry; his scar is the final Horcrux."


	18. Chapter 18

I was frozen in place. I had considered that there was a connection back in fifth year, but not that he was... would have to be...  _ sacrificed. _

_ Not Harry... _

"Hermione." Severus said, but it was muted and far away. My best friend had to go get himself killed.

I shook my head,  _ I don't want to play anymore _ . I wanted to go home and be held by my parents, or kneel for my Miss and make it all go away.

A sharp pain to my face woke me up, and my eyes were met by icy blue. Luna was before me, her face schooled in resolve.

"Hermione Granger, we have a war to fight.  **_I need you here._ ** Snape, I know you've got a plan. How can we help?" Luna charmed her hair into a french braid, and a second later I felt a similar charm on my own hair. It was almost too tight, but it kept my mind focused on the here and now.

Severus nodded, tapping his wand behind his left ear and muttering a duplication charm. Two knuts fell into his left hand and stuck them behind our left ears. It was cold, and a slight buzz was felt as I heard a bit of static.

"Parkinson took your idea of charmed coins and merged it with the Weasley's Extendable Ear. It will pick up whatever you say and transmit it to the other coins." Severus instructed, tapping his with his left index finger. My eyes lingered on his digits, wondering if he'll ever touch me again. not now...

"Parkinson, I've just recruited Granger and Lovegood. They are on our side and I will vouch for their... practicality. Do we have the spare rifle?" Severus' voice was sharp; he was ordering his own into the field of war and didn't like it.

"Yeah, Greengrass still working on... her other assignment. It's in the armory." Pansy's voice came from just behind me, and I turned my head only to see nobody there.

"It's like those two-way radios..." I said in awe. Snape actually smirked in pride.

"Luna, take Granger to the owlery. The janitor's closet will open at the words 'Blood Traitor'. There will be a pair of muggle binoculars and sniper rifle. Do not touch the tips of the bullets. Greengrass will direct you where to shoot from."

"Like that muggle video game I saw in the theater. Would you like me to activate the mine field?" Luna's usually aloof tone was back, but held an edge to it.

"WHAT?!" Snape shouted, followed by similar cries of surprise in my left ear.

"I sensed them once I put on the Diadem. Roweena thought that Salazar Slytherin might try to return to Hogwarts, so she left something quite devious that only she thought she could employ."

"Do they explode?" Zabini's voice asked.

"No, she was a bit more merciful than that. It's a nullifying field at the outer perimeter, followed by some lethal, but merciful, wards for those approaching the castle. She made sure that those coming from inside the castle wouldn't set them off." Luna said happily.

"A null field? That has only ever been theoretical..." Snape mused. He looked at Luna with a fierce look, it was almost fanatic. "Get the weapons, and protect her."

"With my life, Headmaster."

* * *

Luna and I made our way down to the Owlery, my nerves on edge for the upcoming fight.

"Can you believe that Severus had planned all this out?" I asked Luna as she kept an eye out for any rogue snatchers.

"To fight here at Hogwarts? It makes sense, he would have the home field advantage." Luna replied flatly.

"Yeah, but we also have some Slytherins willing to fight alongside us. I guess I shouldn't be too surprised..." I replied in quiet awe.

"Blood Traitor." Luna said to the doorway, which unlocked with a eerie squelch. The muggle firearms were there just like he said, and the ammunition was carefully covered.

"Careful, Granger, those are poisoned rounds. There should be some gloves there for you to handle them with." Daphne chirped in to my left ear.

"You've been listening in the whole time?" I asked, affronted.

"No, you've been transmitting. As for the Headmaster, he knew some of us were leery with Umbridge's regime back when she created the Inquisitorial Squad."

"But you were there! When she threatened to use an Unforgivable on me!" I snapped.

"I didn't sign up for that, I had to keep up appearances. Besides, none of us were even approached about Dumbledore's Army. So we made our own." She replied through the communicator.

"Think the Sorting Hat will be pleased?" I quipped as I adjusted the sling. Could I snipe people? Kill them in cold blood?

Luna must have noticed my concern and snatched the rifle away from me. "If you can't handle it, I will." I flinched slightly, taking the omnioculars for myself. I guess I can be her spotter.

We took a position at the top of the owlery; Luna conjured herself a flat surface and I took a nearby window, using the omnioculars to suss out potential threats. Neville seemed to be setting up charges on the bridge.  _ They are going to destroy it?  _ The wards on the castle were being strengthened by the Professors, the shimmer of the bubble around Hogwarts reflecting every layer of protection being added to it.

"It's a pretty shield, but it is only going to buy us time." I mused aloud. "Greengrass, may I ask how long you have been working with Severus? I thought he would have been too busy being Headmaster to also build a guerrilla army..."

My left ear chirped slightly as she hummed. "It was after Katie Bell got attacked. Headmaster Snape was making inquiries into his house and interrogated each of us with legilimency. After a while, he summoned a few of us he knew were against The Dark Lord and would want to fight. Even we don't know everyone else in the Slytherin Resistance, we were grouped up in sets of three and given different tasks while pretending to be loyal Purebloods. I just know he called us the Silver Trio, and that there was an Emerald and a Sapphire..." Her voice trailed off.

"What is it?" I asked, worried.

"He told us to not try and guess who was in the other cells; that such knowledge would invariably cause problems if we were to be captured. You're the girl, aren't you?"

_ I am the girl? _ "What are you talking about?"

"Headmaster Snape informed us to combat the Dark Magic that we've had to embrace as a part of our new curriculum by having a purpose. You were his, weren't you?"

_ She knows I was his submissive?? _ My heart leaps into my mouth, choking my voice to silence.

"She was his. Up until the moment he wiped her memory and scrambled her brain..." Luna said, loading the rifle.

"Miss, Severus was busy plotting and fighting a war, one to keep us safe! He obviously had others he was protecting as well; I wouldn't have wanted him to leave others at risk just because I nearly blew his cover!" I said, chastising her.  _ Maybe that's it, Severus wasn't only trying to keep me safe, but everyone. _ And he didn't want to have to choose between them and me.

Luna adjusted her sights, avoiding all eye contact with me, muttering. "I'm expendable, and you're not. He treated you wrong. You deserved better."

_ What's her problem? _ I wondered as I saw the bridge collapse with a series of explosions.

"Headmaster Snape had opposed The Dark Lord because of a woman he once loved had died. He told us that someone new had become his purpose, his reason to fight and keep his Dark Magic at bay. She got too close to him and... found out too much. It would have risked the outcome of the entire war, so he tried to protect her along with everyone else."

Luna scoffed, rolling her eyes at her words. "Let me guess, you also have a purpose? Some muggle girlfriend of your own that you desire?"

"Miss, what's wrong with you?" I asked, wondering where this was coming from. She knows I care about her, right?

"No, Looney. I'm fighting so that I can get out of my arranged marriage to Goyle! Some traditions have to change, like this near-inbreeding nonsense because of some notion about blood purity..." Greengrass replied. "Check the forest line, I see movement."

Pulling out my omnioculars, I saw the movement. It was in the trees.  _ It was the Gurg.  _ I swallowed my panic.

"It's the Giants. Magic won't hurt them." I kept scanning the perimeter as snatchers and death eaters apparated and formed ranks.

"That's why we have venom-infused ammo. Make every shot count, go for the chest or head. Greengrass out."

Disillioning the pair of us, I began putting up various 'notice-me-not' charms. 

_ It had begun. _


	19. Chapter 19

The first wave began to run in from the edges of the Forbidden Forest towards the bridge as the Gurg held back, making the lesser giants lead with the rag-tag snatchers and Ministry officials still under the Imperious Curse. Voldemort's forces seriously outnumbered the defenders of the castle, and a thread of hopelessness chilled me to my core.

Parkinson's voice cut through. “Target the Giants and all enemy forces that break too far ahead of the advance. We want to capture as many combatants at once with the null field as possible.”

Luna's weapon cracked the air as it went off, and I conjured ear plugs for the pair of us. She flinched at the offer, but relented and put them in. The way she looked at me, however, made me want to crumble.

“Confirmed, giant down. Looks like a head shot will kill within within a minute.” Parkinson's voice was cool and detached, almost eerie how calm it had seemed.

Luna turned away from her scope, a grim smile on her face. "Hermione, you will keep your resolve, and you will survive this."

"I know... I'm worried about the future." I wanted to be sure we would still be okay, that Severus and I would survive the war, and that the three of us would find a way to make this work.

"Now's not the time to worry about that, love." Luna stilled as another round exploded out of the barrel. I looked out over the battlefield and saw a headshot drop another giant. Luna's voice came through the communication knut. "Giant down."

"Miss, I want to talk about what you did to the Carrows..." A werewolf broke past the crowd and was running on all fours, its feral speed would spring the null field trap too soon. Before I could train my wand on him, a bullet blew through the knee and the werewolf crumpled to the ground, bellowing in pain and looking for whomever cast a spell.

Luna's face hardened as a look of rage flashed across it. "They got what they deserved."

Parkinson's voice chirped through, sharp and angry. "Lovegood, aim for the head or chest and make it a quick, clean kill! Don't give up our positions!"

The Darkness that had seeped through her hair seemed to radiate outward. "Dead is dead, and this way, they can suffer a bit more."

Zabini's voice cut through, panicked. "Granger, what's going on? You two need to keep level heads right now..."

"Did either of you get exposed to Dark Magic?" Parkinson asked as the first wave was hit with the null field. A flash of light swept through, snapping wands in half and undoing disguise charms and disillusionment spells.

_ It worked. It... undid magic _ . I marveled at the intricate spell work, how it had to stay empowered yet dormant for centuries...

...and then they began to melt the flesh into the ground beneath them, leaving odd piles of bones across the battlefield. Dark red glyphs glowed from the ground as it drank in the liquefied invaders.

"I think that got their attention."

The focused spell work that Voldemort and the Death Eaters had been using to take down the shield around Hogwarts stuttered as they took in what had just happened. It was a small reprieve in the battle; nobody wanted to advance after that.

"They aren't going to advance?? Come on, get into range you cowards..." Luna spat, bloodlust apparent in her voice.

"Miss, calm down. Something's wrong. Put down the weapon." I kept my voice as soothing as possible. This wasn't the woman who saved me; in fact, I wasn't sure my Miss was there at all anymore.

"No! The only thing that's wrong is that I can't... damn angle..." Luna put down the firearm and waved her wand over the length of the rifle, forcing it to change shape and condense down into what appeared to be a large stiletto dagger. Picking up the blade in her left hand, she gave me a penetrating gaze. My feet felt rooted to the spot, and I realized why I had been immobilized against my will.

_ She was going to go after them by herself without us. _

"Don't! It's suicide!"

"Stay." With that, Luna disapparated and the spell that held me was released.

I took to the sniping perch were Luna was and used the omnioculars to search the field for her.

Soon enough, a flurry of spells flew and crashed into a red shield that sprang up around Luna as she stood defiantly on a glowing rune.  _ What is she doing?? She'll get killed! _

"Come on, Tom... I have your Diadem..." Luna's magically magnified voice was sinister as she taunted him with the sing-song banter.

"I've got to save her! Cover me!" I said into my communicator.

"Who are you, little girl? I'm here for Harry Potter..." Voldemort replied, not letting up on his barrage of curses that seemed to have no effect on the shield.

Parkinson's voice cut through. "Granger,  **let her go** . You can't save her now."

"My name no longer matters,  _ Tom Riddle _ . Just the fact that I'm more clever than you and you've already lost this war."

"She needs me!"  _ This wasn't right _ . I had to apparate right behind her and hope the shield held up for both of us...

"No! Headmaster Snape warned us about Dark Magic; if you don't have control of yourself and your emotions, it will take you over. Lovegood's drenched in it right now, and we've got our mission to complete!" Zabini shouted as another wave of snatchers and Imperiused Ministry employees charged at my Miss.

Luna never raised her wand to them, she simply let them run across the field towards her until the piles of skeletons began exploding, one by one. It was a chain reaction, each skeleton that exploded when a person was near made their bones flying shrapnel to cut down the others around it. She was gloating the butchery, but shuddered as the magic was taking its toll.

"Hey Granger, can you see her hairline? I think the Diadem's making her bleed..." Pansy said in soft horror. Luna was holding her own, but there seemed to be a cost to it.

"I don't think she'll be able to hold out much longer, she's been messing with ancient blood rites out there..." Zabini muttered fearfully.

"I have to go save her."

"GRANGER!" Snape's voice cut through raggedly, "Don't." A cough not unlike a death rattle made me flinch for a second, but I didn't have time to worry about him. Focusing on myself, I turned and apparated myself directly behind Luna as the remaining forces worked on hexing the glowing runes on the field.

There were other voices on the communicator now; something about Snape being down and the Emerald raised a disapparition jinx.  _ Doesn't matter now, Luna's in trouble... _

"I told you to stay up there, Hermione." Luna's fist was white-knuckled around the handle of the dagger, the tip undoubtedly laced with poison. 

"You think your little traps will stop me?! I'll make certain your death is slow and painful, and let your Mudblood watch!" Voldemort shot a signal into the air, and Dementors began to swarm and approach us. Apparently they didn't set off the null field and slowly made their way across the open plain in search of souls.

"Please, stop this, Miss." I lifted my wand, but couldn't get my Patronus to come out. Luna was still keeping a defensive shield up, and the determination on her face told me that it was taking a lot out of her to keep it up.

"They deserve the  _ absolute worst  _ I can give them."

The white vapor I conjured dissipated; I wasn't going to be able to repel them.

"This isn't you. This isn't the woman I began to have feelings for. Come back to the tower with me, Luna." I reached for her arm, hoping to pull her away and apparate us back to relative safety. Blistering pain shot through me as my fingers made contact with her.  _ She won't let me save her... _

" **How dare you!** _I put you back together!_ "

"That doesn't give you a free pass to act like this! You're being  _ no better than Snape was _ !"

"I didn't  **hurt you** like he did!" The Dementors were closing in, and the bone-chilling coldness swept over me.

"But you're hurting me now..."

"I know what's going on. I can tell!" The blood flowing from her Diadem slowed down, and I finally noticed how pale she had become. I felt it pulling at me, extracting my will to survive and wondered how Luna was able to withstand this as well.

"Miss, I'm begging you to calm down..." I wasn't about to leave her, and if I couldn't save her, at least we'd be together.

**"HOW CAN YOU FORGIVE HIM!"** A Dementor's bony hand reached out from the black floating robes and touched her shield, cracking it. _It seemed... joyous._

"Because  **I LOVE HIM** !  _ And I love you... _ " Luna's shield collapsed, and in a panic, I grabbed and pulled her into my arms.  _ There was no pain this time, only love. _ My Patronus flew out of my want instinctively, repelling the Dementor that was on top of us.

"No. No, you don't. Looney's the expendable one. After tonight you won't need me anymore. I might as well make as much of a difference as I can out here, at least for the next few minutes..." Luna muttered as she went limp in my arms, and I didn't have time to figure out if she was okay.  _ she would just have to be... _

My Patronus was met with others as the Dementors were being chased away from the battle.

The glowing glyphs on the field faded as the Death Eaters began to advance...


	20. Chapter 20

Parkinson and Zabini took point between us and the Death Eaters who were advancing on our position, shield charms up as they were casting magic through their own defensive barrier.

_ How was that even possible? _

“Fall back, Granger!” the witch said as more wand-fire came from behind us. I turned to see the Weasley Twins in shock at the sight of Slytherins fighting on their side of the battle.

“Come on, ‘Mione.” George urged, “Fred, help with Luna.”

“Right,” Said Fred.

The twins helped us back towards Hogwarts when I finally realized that shock had been settling in. 

_ Tunnel vision and hearing, inability to focus…  _

Yeah. It was shock.

I was sitting in the Great Hall, which was barricaded and being used as an emergency medical ward, when I seemed to snap back into reality. Luna was still out of it, and Snape’s prone figure was laying on a table a few feet away.

I didn’t recall moving to his side, but I found myself holding his hand while Madame Pomfrey checked his vitals and drew a black cross on his chest.

“Master Snape…” I whispered, scared to wake him.  _ He was injured and needed his rest. _ His hand was cold in mine, and my brain refused to make sense of it.

“Hermione…” The voice wasn’t his, so I shrugged it off.

“Just get better. Please.” I choked back on tears. “I need you.”

“Hermione, let him go.” 

“NO!” I shouted back at them, and flinched in fear that I’d wake him up.  _ Just rest, Sir… you can wake up when you’re well. _

“He’s dead.”

* * *

The battle soon subsided as Luna had pulled off a large-scale massacre of Voldemort’s troops, and Harry had somehow died and defeated Voldemort, but was still alive all the same. He told me that it was only the horcrux in him that had been destroyed, but I couldn’t make sense of any of it.

“Has she said anything?” Harry asked, nodding towards Luna.

I shrugged.  _ I couldn’t understand anything anymore. _

“Hermione, they need to move Snape’s body out of here. They need the space for the wounded that they can heal.” As Harry said that, I looked over my Master, my Sir.

_ Severus was dead. _

“Okay.” My voice sounded foreign to myself. I had no idea how long it had been since I last talked, but it felt wrong to speak.

_ He’s dead, and she’s gone. There is nothing left. _

I let Harry guide me away from Severus’ body and I found myself seated next to an unconscious Luna. I took her hand and stroked my cheek with her palm, missing the casual touch of affection.

_ Come back, Miss. _

_ come back… _

* * *

Hogwarts had been cleaned up, and I was told that we’d all be getting Order of Merlin awards in a week. I declined attending the ceremony and would instead keep my vigil over Luna in the Hospital Wing.

Ronald had attempted to talk to me, but with no effect. Fred had died in the final battle, along with Tonks, Arthur, and a handful of other people who I couldn’t give a damn about. 

It was only when Ronald tried to physically remove me from Luna’s side that he was blasted away with wandless magic.

“Oi! I’m only trying to help you, you bloody munter!” Ron yelled at me, wincing in pain.

I blinked and found myself back in reality as I looked at him. “That wasn’t me.” I turned back to Luna and realized that she was cognizant on some level.

“You’ve been here for over a month!” Ron sounded exasperated. “Please. ‘Mione… come back to us. Come back to me.”

I shook my head at that, knowing how wrong it was. “I’ll never be yours, Ronald. I belong to her.”

_ I belong to her...  _


	21. My Heart Will Go On

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just figured out the ending; I hope you all have enjoyed this story. It was quite the journey for me to attempt, and you can see the rough ideas that took shape for OSL.

_**Five Years Later** _

* * *

 

“Ms. Granger, do you think I could leave early? I’d like to get home to family for-” My secretary called to me through the doorway.

I replied automatically. “Of course, Kira. Happy Yule.”

“And a Merry Christmas to you. Don’t stay here too late.” I promised I’d leave soon as Kira gathered her belongings and went home.

I finished up a report for the Minister and left early as well, savoring a walk through the atrium. Even though we were deep in the bowels of the Ministry, it was nice to feel a gentle breeze play with my curls as I made my way to the floo stations.

Harry and Ginny had invited me to Grimmauld Place for the holiday, but I declined as I already had plans.  _ Besides, they were producing an entire quidditch team with her uterus and it’s too rambunctious.  _

I held the gift in my hands, sighing at what had become a tradition. I was wearing a modest yet snug dress, designed for your eyes to trace over every curve of my body. The only thing that made it scandalous was the pale blue shade, which seemed out of place in this time of year.

_ It’s her favorite color. _

As I stepped through the Floo, I made my way up, exchanging holiday pleasantries with people who passed by.

“Ms. Granger, I was wondering if you were doing anything to ring in the New Year.”

I smiled politely, knowing where he was going with this. “Sorry, I’m not interested, Nelson. I’ll probably be here, though.”

His face fell; I knew he had developed an attraction to me, but it wasn’t reciprocated. 

“I just… Janus Thickey Ward’s no place to be for Christmas.” The concern on his eyes shone through.

My polite smile fell slightly, and it hurt to keep up appearances. “It’s like my home away from home now. Besides, they deserve guests too.”

I made my way into the long term spell damage ward at St. Mungo’s, eyes flicking to the soundproofed room where Scotty screamed non-stop, terror etched deep in his eyes. The Healers believe that somehow he had fallen victim to a poorly cast memory charm.

_ It wasn’t poorly cast. It was done perfectly. _

The projector and screen was already up when I got there, and I thanked the Healer for having it already set up as I opened the box and the smell of fresh popcorn filled the air. I sat by Luna’s bed and tapped the projector with my wand to play  _ Titanic _ .

“Happy Yule, Miss.” I said, squeezing her hand as the muggle movie began. Her hand squeezed back slightly, as it usually did when she heard the singing.

_ Luna was still in there. _

_ And I would wait. _


End file.
